u/Affectionate_Bar_743

Ive been dating a guy for two months now. We have met up at least once every week but the last couple of weeks it was twice or more. When we meet up it’s mostly him asking me to see me.

In those months he has sad that mentally he’s not in the right place. He doesn’t know what he wants in life, he feels like his life is falling apart. Last week he mentioned wanting to go on vacation for a month or two. He did ask my thoughts on it and I told him I would never say he can’t do it, but that I would find it difficult.

He starts messaging first a lot of the times. When he doesn’t it’s because he’s spiralling. I know I can’t be the one to help him and he has to do it but it’s really starting to hurt me. I asked him last night if he wants to go on a double date with a friend of mine and he again said he doesn’t know what he want and he might go away for a while.

I told him then that I am starting to have feelings for him and he said he respects me and likes being with me but feelings for him have to grow. He doesn’t know if he will ever feel love again because he got hurt too much.

I don’t know what to do with this situation. The thing is when he spirals he also doesn’t take care of himself for two days, it’s always his off work days because he’s home and doesn’t know what to do. He functions fine on workdays.

I feel so good when I’m with him. He’s kind and notices things like me being cold and giving me a blanket. He has a passion for job and that’s what’s hurting him because it’s not going well there at the moment.

We have been dating for almost two months now. It’s been going well. We have had some ups and downs, mostly because mentally he isn’t always in the right headspace and then he can disappear a couple of days.

The last few weeks have been really good. He messages me more frequently, asks me almost daily to meet up, speaks about future plans.

Now he has mentioned needing a vacation but because it was so soon I didn’t want to concretely plan something for the summer until we make it official. Now he suddenly mentioned planning a vacation with a coworker for 2 months. He did ask me how I feel about it, and I told him I am not the person to deny him doing fun things but that I would find it a bit difficult not seeing him so long. His birthday is during that period, I start work the second month so technically the first month he is gone is my last month of vacation. He said he understands but that he’s young now and now is the time to do those vacations bc it’s a very physically active vacation.

I’m not sure how I feel about it. I don’t want to be the reason he doesn’t make this trip, but I don’t know how to feel about not seeing and probably not hearing him for two months. It’s a nature vacation so he won’t always have a full battery so I probably won’t hear him daily.

Most of my friends all work so it would also mean I won’t have anyone to go on vacation with this summer because my friends take leave for vacations with their partners and not friends.