

This July 4th, we would like to celebrate with a proclamation of...
RULE BRITANNIA
BY PROCLIMATION OF THE HERALDS OF THE GOOD AND BENEFICENT VIRGIN QUEEN, BLESSED AND BELOVED BY THE MOST MAJESTIC GODDESS OF ALL MEN, BRITANNIA, WE DO PROCLAIM IN KIND TO THE BENIGHTED SUBJECTS IN THE AMERICAS.
Whereas many of our recalcitrant Subjects in the diverse parts of our rightful colonies in North America, misled by dangerous and ill-designing backwards gods and false prophets, and forgetting the allegiance which they owe to the Power that has birthed and protected them, after various disorderly acts committed in disturbance of the Pax Britannia, to the obstruction of lawful commonality, and to the oppression of our most loyal Subjects carrying on the same, have at length proceeded to an open and continued ignoble resistance, by arraying themselves in a hostile manner withstanding the execution of the Pax Britannia, and traitorous preparing, ordering, and levying oppressive disobedience against fair dues of our great Albion.
All good and pious men are to submit themselves before the Crown and its rightful and lawful representative upon your wayward coasts. As harbingers of civilization, those of good standing and good morals have nothing to fear from the righteous armies whomst carry the sun-lit banners of the Goddess Britannia. Those who pledge their devotion to the cause of civilization and the peace of the Goddess Britannia will find tranquility and prosperity under her most regal dominion. To those who irrationally insist on the continuation of superstitions, heathenry, and barbarity, we will only give one warning as is right and proper til such wanton primitiveness is met in kind with force of arms and force of powder.
(Happy Independence Day everyone! May the Founders bless you!)