u/Alternative_Size_550

There is something so depressing about working so hard to upkeep other people’s lives (who have it SO much better than me!!) to the point where i’m so exhausted I can’t even tend to my own life.

Then I get to hear about how exhausting and stressful it is being a SAHM (it is, but I’m hearing it from my MB that I work full time hours for).

Im just over working myself to death just to feel like a servant in other peoples lives. Does this feeling ever go away? Ive been in this career for 7 years and I fear I’m in too deep to change career paths without seriously sabotaging my financial situation.

Not sure if I’m looking for advice, validation, support or what. Over the last few weeks Ive been in a serious depressive episode and have had an overwhelming feeling of “I just don’t want to do this job anymore.”

I love my NKs so fiercely and the parents are so wonderful. I really have no complaints about the family other than the occasional annoyances that come along with working in someone’s home.

I’ve noticed Ive stopped planning elaborate activities, having dance parties, or being my overly joyous self that I usually am. I’m always exhausted and run out of patience quickly. I know I’m doing the kids and parents a disservice but I can’t pull myself out of it. Even after a long weekend with plenty of rest and self care, I’m just not happy to be doing this job.

Idk have I reached the end of this career? I’m unfortunately not qualified to do anything outside of this field and remain at the same income. And I feel incredibly guilty even thinking about leaving because the parents have been so generous and accommodating & kids are so young and very attached to me.

ugh help.

No one tells you that you’re going to sync up with your MB. One week out of the month there’s an understanding that the bare minimum is enough from both of us. Pray for my DB. 😭