u/Annual-Rip2611

When I (36f) was 13 or 14, my best friend and I used to spy on my older brother and his girlfriend as they hung out in the basement. He was 6 years older than me. She and I had a lookout spot outside a basement window with a full view of the couch, it was a whole thing. We were weird curious kids.

They would watch a movie and make out and sometimes fall asleep, and we were infatuated with having a view into this adult world. We’d make predictions about what they were going to do next, guess what they were talking about, etc.

When their makeouts started to involve clothes coming off, we stopped. Not because we weren’t curious, but because we felt like we would get in big trouble if we got caught. But my curiosity got the best of me and I snuck out there alone and started to watch them by myself.

I saw a lot. It was weird to see them doing these things, but I couldn’t look away and I was so curious and fascinated.

Of course, I got busted. His girlfriend sent me a note saying that they had seen me out there, and to please stop. So I did.

Fast forward to last weekend, when my brother and I were at a wedding, had too much to drink. His ex girlfriend was there too, and he brought the situation up to me - laughing, he said “remember how you used to watch me and Donna? Why did you?”

I didn’t answer, and he said “did you, like, get off on it?”

I stammered and stuttered and didn’t answer, and changed the subject. I sent him a long text the next day apologizing for doing that, it was so long ago, etc.

He said “no worries, but you didn’t answer my question.”

Do I need to respond to this? And what do I say? I don’t sense that he’s mad but I’m surprised he asked again.

Last summer my (44m) good college friend (Dan, 44m) and his wife (Shelly, 45f) stayed at our home while my wife (Jenna, 42f) and I were out of town. They had flight trouble and had trouble finding a hotel, and Dan texted me late to see if they could stay at our place. I said sure, and gave him the codes for the lock etc.

Dan and Shelly left the following afternoon, everything was fine, I hadn’t thought much about it since.

I received a call yesterday from Shelly saying she had to tell me something. She had found a photo on Dan’s phone of the art hanging in our primary bathroom, which is a three panel set of nude sketches of Jenna that an artist did a couple years ago.

Shelly was shocked to find the photos, although she acknowledged that they had both seen the sketches during their visit (which wasn’t a big deal - if we had known they were coming we would have likely covered them).

Shelly said she hasn’t addressed it with Dan yet, but will. She wanted to check with me first and “follow my lead” as to whether I will tell Jenna and if I’d like to talk to Dan about it after she talks to him. I said I’d get back to her.

I’m not surprised they saw the sketches, that’s not unexpected. But Dan taking the photo and getting “busted” is a shock here.

I assume I should let my wife know and talk to Dan but I’d love opinions.

Last summer my (44m) good college friend (Dan, 44m) and his wife (Shelly, 45f) stayed at our home while my wife (Jenna, 42f) and I were out of town. They had flight trouble and had trouble finding a hotel, and Dan texted me late to see if they could stay at our place. I said sure, and gave him the codes for the lock etc.

Dan and Shelly left the following afternoon, everything was fine, I hadn’t thought much about it since.

I received a call yesterday from Shelly saying she had to tell me something. She had found a photo on Dan’s phone of the art hanging in our primary bathroom, which is a three panel set of nude sketches of Jenna that an artist did a couple years ago.

Shelly was shocked to find the photos, although she acknowledged that they had both seen the sketches during their visit (which wasn’t a big deal - if we had known they were coming we would have likely covered them).

Shelly said she hasn’t addressed it with Dan yet, but will. She wanted to check with me first and “follow my lead” as to whether I will tell Jenna and if I’d like to talk to Dan about it after she talks to him. I said I’d get back to her.

I’m not surprised they saw the sketches, that’s not unexpected. But Dan taking the photo and getting “busted” is a shock here.

I assume I should let my wife know and talk to Dan but I’d love opinions.

Last summer my (44m) good college friend (Dan, 44m) and his wife (Shelly, 45f) stayed at our home while my wife (Jenna, 42f) and I were out of town. They had flight trouble and had trouble finding a hotel, and Dan texted me late to see if they could stay at our place. I said sure, and gave him the codes for the lock etc.

Dan and Shelly left the following afternoon, everything was fine, I hadn’t thought much about it since.

I received a call yesterday from Shelly saying she had to tell me something. She had found a photo on Dan’s phone of the art hanging in our primary bathroom, which is a three panel set of nude sketches of Jenna that an artist did a couple years ago.

Shelly was shocked to find the photos, although she acknowledged that they had both seen the sketches during their visit (which wasn’t a big deal - if we had known they were coming we would have likely covered them).

Shelly said she hasn’t addressed it with Dan yet, but will. She wanted to check with me first and “follow my lead” as to whether I will tell Jenna and if I’d like to talk to Dan about it after she talks to him. I said I’d get back to her.

I’m not surprised they saw the sketches, that’s not unexpected. But Dan taking the photo and getting “busted” is a shock here.

I assume I should let my wife know and talk to Dan but I’d love opinions.