u/AnonymousBeeps

I had a dream, you broke no contact, texting me that you needed help with some huge calculations in code and then I write you a script to run those calculations and explain you on call how to run that script. It was really cute, and I was really happy... And then I woke up.

I see my phone, you actually texted me and deleted that message, and I jus had to text you back...

A week without talking to you... It's been really hard, but what got me through it was the fact that you wanted it and hoped it'd bring you peace. And that's all I want for you now since I've made you go through a lot, and I don't want that for you anymore. I wish to be patient with you, not rush.. take all the time to figure out things.

Why? Because you are special, my heart can feel it, and mahn when my heart feels smth soo damn right, it's never wrong! I can't explain it, but it is what it is, and i can't let go, i can't give up. Why? Because I fell in love with you. And I jus wanna love you right. I'm not saying i want to be with you, that's not in my hands, whether or not we are gonna end up together... But what is in my hands, is how I treat you, care for you, love you, not give up on you. I realized, the best way I can love you is to respect your stance, you're stance is to not be with me, and that's completely okay, if that means you get to be happy and at peace, because I only want the best for you. But if you're confused rn, dw I'm not gonna give up on you and run away. I'll be right here, maybe not with you, but jus as a smol hand from distance, supporting you, helping you, loving you...

And this is what gets me through all these lonely days.. the fact that I love you no matter what.

Sometimes I think,

about what we were

and what we could've become,

and I keep thinking...

unable to sleep.

Sometimes I don't think,

but the emptiness of my mind

belongs to you,

and I keep thinking...

unable to sleep.

And I lost you when I loved you the most...