Don’t really have any friends, hoping this watch can fill the dark void inside of me.
Also wondering how long after buying this I should expect my social life to improve. Thanks in advance.
Tommy Tommy bum bum,
Always talks but never won one.
Interim king with paper crown,
Walks real fast but falls right down.
Tommy Tommy quitter quitter,
Every interview gets more bitter.
Waiting, tweeting, stomping feet,
Still can’t make the GOAT retreat.
Tommy Tommy boo hoo boy,
Acting like they stole his toy.
“Jon won’t fight!”
Cry some more.
Maybe knock on Dana’s door.
Tommy Tommy huff and puff,
Beat some guys? That’s not enough.
Real champs wait,
Real champs scheme,
You’re just living in a Reddit dream.
Tommy Tommy yappity yap,
Interim belt is just cosplay crap.
Polish it daily, hug it tight,
It’s still not gold no matter the light.
Tommy Tommy cope cope cope,
Living off fanboy thoughts and hope.
When the history books are finally done,
They’ll say,
“Yeah… that interim guy was fun.”
Tommy Tommy bum bum,
Never was the chosen one
From Ciryl Gane Tommy runs
The real heavyweight champ is Gane
Tom is done
Tommy Tommy bum bum,
Always talks but never won one.
Interim king with paper crown,
Walks real fast but falls right down.
Tommy Tommy quitter quitter,
Every interview gets more bitter.
Waiting, tweeting, stomping feet,
Still can’t make the GOAT retreat.
Tommy Tommy boo hoo boy,
Acting like they stole his toy.
“Jon won’t fight!”
Cry some more.
Maybe knock on Dana’s door.
Tommy Tommy huff and puff,
Beat some guys? That’s not enough.
Real champs wait,
Real champs scheme,
You’re just living in a Reddit dream.
Tommy Tommy yappity yap,
Interim belt is just cosplay crap.
Polish it daily, hug it tight,
It’s still not gold no matter the light.
Tommy Tommy cope cope cope,
Living off fanboy thoughts and hope.
When the history books are finally done,
They’ll say,
“Yeah… that interim guy was fun.”
Tommy Tommy bum bum,
Never was the chosen one
From Ciryl Gane Tommy runs
The real heavyweight champ is Gane
Tom is done
Jones vs Smith is probably the worst dismantling I’ve ever seen in a title fight. 48-44 and would be 50-44 without the foul. At no point was Smith even close to winning this fight.
Another close one for me is Aspinall vs Gane. Ciryl Gane looked incredible in the first round, was piecing Tom up on the feet effortlessly, stuffing takedowns and managing distance. Tom just had no answer.
This fight was definitely heading towards a round 3 or 4 TKO in Gane’s favor. Tom got pretty lucky when that eye poke happened and it was smart of him to take advantage.
It feels like every dominant champion gets thrown into the GOAT conversation before they have actually built a GOAT resume.
Win a few title fights? GOAT.
Look unbeatable? GOAT.
Pass the eye test? GOAT.
When did dominance become more important than who you actually beat?
A true all time resume should be filled with elite wins over opponents in their prime, different styles, years of sustained success, and victories that still hold up a decade later.
Being incredibly skilled is not the same thing as having one of the greatest careers ever.
Those are two completely different conversations.
Some fans have started treating “he would have beaten everyone” like it is more valuable than “he actually beat everyone.”
That is backwards.
Legacy is earned over time, not handed out because someone looks untouchable for a couple of years.
Which brings me to the fighter everyone seems afraid to say this about.
Islam.
Phenomenal fighter? Absolutely.
Top 15 all time? Sure.
GOAT?
Not even close.
For someone who is already being put in top 5 and even number 1 all time conversations, his resume leaves a lot to be desired.
Most of his biggest wins came against naturally smaller fighters moving up in weight or opponents that were considered favorable matchups.
Maybe he gets there someday.
But right now people are ranking the career they think Islam will have instead of the one he has actually built. That is exactly what is wrong with modern GOAT debates.
JUST KIDDING ASSHITALL IS A FCKING BUM AND A QUITTER
I think it will, considering how Tommy BUM BUM has become a full time youtuber instead of a fighter. An absolute bum is what he is. A quitter and a fake champ. King Gane is going to finish what he started.
Tommy Bum Bum, the Quitter Quitter Guy
Tommy Bum Bum, the quitter quitter guy,
Caught one eye poke, then waved goodbye.
Said “I can’t see!” and left the cage,
Then fought his battles on the social page.
Tommy Bum Bum, keyboard in his hand,
Posting more than fighting wasn’t quite the plan.
Every interview, another tale,
While the heavyweight division went stale.
Got LASIK done, “my eye’s repaired!”
Fans just looked and scratched and stared.
New glasses gone, new vision bright,
Still no rush to book a fight.
Keeps that interim belt nice and clean,
The longest “almost” champ we’ve ever seen.
Championship gold without championship pay,
Just waiting for tomorrow… every day.
Tommy Bum Bum, the quitter quitter guy,
Always another reason why.
Less octagon, more YouTube grind,
The comments section is where he’ll shine.
Tommy Bum Bum, don’t take it hard,
You’ve mastered every media card.
When history asks what title you won,
Just say, “Interim… and the tweeting was fun.”
But he never reached that potential.
Seriously. The guy is 6’9”, built like Karl Malone, moves like a guard, has an all time basketball IQ, elite passing, elite athleticism, and played for over 20 years. On paper he should’ve been the undisputed GOAT and it shouldn’t even be close.
Instead he spent his career looking for the easiest path possible.
MJ would’ve won 8 straight with that body. Kobe would’ve averaged 40 out of pure spite. Give either of them LeFlopper’s physical gifts and the GOAT debate would’ve ended before it started.
Instead we got LeTeamSwitcher bouncing from superteam to superteam every time things got difficult. Miami. Back to Cleveland. Then Hollywood. Every move calculated around making life easier instead of embracing the challenge.
And don’t even get me started on the body language. Hands up after every missed rotation. Looking at teammates after every turnover. Flopping around like he got hit by a freight train because someone brushed his shoulder.
The talent was limitless. The mentality wasn’t.
The funniest part is people confuse longevity with greatness. Congrats, LeFlopper played forever. If you need 20+ years, multiple franchises, handpicked rosters, and endless excuses to stay in the GOAT conversation, maybe you were never the GOAT to begin with.
The greatest body in NBA history with a mentality that always looked for the path of least resistance. That’s why he’ll always be remembered as the greatest “what if” instead of the undisputed greatest ever.