u/Aromatic-Swan7855

I went a month NC with mom just to cool off, take some space. I reached back out at the end of the month as I had planned. When I came back she was fine, but I was met with more guilt-tripping. Like I was being difficult, shutting her out. She brought up this point of knowing someone who keeps in contact with his mom atleast once a week and told me to promise this. Apparently during this time she vented a lot to my grandma about how I was difficult and a bad child.

She is sweet in a lot of ways but clearly mentally unstable and I'm thinking I might need to take space again, for longer. Thoughts? Similar experiences?

I recently had a sexual encounter with a man. There was intoxication on both sides, more so on my end. I didn't feel fully clear or comfortable about my capacity at the time. I had to sit with it to figure out what it means for me.

What’s been disturbing is watching people immediately try to force the situation into a clean category. Half of Reddit calls it a false accusation. The other half says it’s obviously rape. There seems to be no room left for ambiguity, confusion, or complicated feelings when alcohol is involved.

I think we’ve lost the ability to talk honestly about grey-area experiences. Not every person who comes forward is trying to “ruin someone’s life,” and not every confusing encounter fits neatly into black-and-white language. Sometimes people are just trying to process something that genuinely left them unsettled.

It’s alarming how quickly young women are pressured to pick a side: either “you fully consented so stop complaining” or “you were assaulted and must frame it that way.” There should be space to talk about experiences that felt violating, confusing, regretful, emotionally complicated, or difficult to understand without thousands of strangers demanding a definitive label immediately.

I'm 21 and I met this wonderful 38 year old at the bar one day. He was super nice and made me feel like the most special girl in the world. We went back to my place to have sex.

We had breakfast the next morning and watched a movie. It was intimate I felt like and he even shared some of his music with me and stuff. He kissed me everytime he left so it kind of already felt like we were in a relationship. We've had a few more dates after this and I thought I really liked him. But I do remember being confused of what he saw me as. And all of our plans were last minute.

We had a date at the bar again. He got me super wasted blacked out drunk, later buying me a 12 pack of alc to take home which he encouraged me to drink from that night. I don't remember what happened but I was not myself that night, slurred speech, falling and everything and next thing you know I was passed out and he was taking off my clothes and stuff and the night ended in a movie.

He kissed me that night saying he enjoyed this week and that I'll be a good mother once I graduate or something. Got a flirty text the next morning reminding me to make sure to practice safe sex or something and when I responded I never heard back.

I guess I was just a fling to him? Or there were concerns about pregnancy? Or maybe I was just embarrassing with my behavior that last night. Idk. It's just kinda heartbreaking to be led on to this extent only to be ignored.