u/Barbielith

Damn, I really wish I had known about this subreddit a month ago! I recently lost my job, and I'm looking for a fresh start.

So what am I looking for? I've been thinking a lot about that myself.

For the last four years, I've been a freelance writer for a few entertainment sites (a fun gig that AI killed slowly). Before that, I had nearly a decade of experience working as a production worker for a local news station down in another state. Mostly video editing (briefly served as the station's Chief Video Editor), but also very experienced with camera work, audio board running, running graphics, and pretty much everything else you can imagine when it comes to producing live news every day.

As much as I love writing, I don't see that being as sustainable as it was a few years ago. I do feel getting back into some kind of media production role would be nice, or anything related to AV work, though I won't lie, I don't know if I can handle hectic, fast-paced environments the way I did in my 20s.

I honestly think maybe something steady, quiet, and reliable might be nice for a change. Some kind of clerical or administrative role could be good. While I'm really good with co-workers, I'm very task-focused on my own and can easily work with no oversight. And if possible, not a public-facing job with steady influxes of customers or clients or anything. Not that I'm not a people person. I just really got used to working solo, lol

I'm not so much worried about ideal schedules right now. I actually like working crazy hours (could easily do nights/weekends if needed). Though something with observed holidays and decent time off would be nice, it's not a dealbreaker, especially for something entry-level.

Pay is probably the next big factor, but really anything close to the equivalent of $18-24 dollars an hour would work for now, at least. Oh, and full-time is a biggie, too. Again, I know that the market is sucky, but full-time would really help.

I'm in the South Durham area, but I am willing to travel at least 35-40 minutes to nearby work, and I have reliable transportation.

All that said, I'm just looking for something simple with decent pay to help me find my footing again.

Best to all of you, hope everyone's searches go well :)

In case you didn't get Simon's update from his latest newsletter:

• You Will Own Nothing and You Will Be Happy is officially on hiatus. Simon's got another issue written and like 30 chapters outlined, but per his own words, Simon "fucked up" and can't focus on it right now. Wants to finish it someday.
• Simon's still having trouble with Megg's Coven and wants to work on it, but once again admits he's really struggling with getting into the dark headspace needed for it.
• Megahex Perfect Edition was delayed because Simon wanted to add notes for backup material.
• Stems and Seeds is going back into print, One More Year isn't, but its material will be included in the second Perfect Edition (which he jokes will be released in 2032 at his pace*. Encourages people to read his Instagram for OOP material.
• Is still working on a secret TV project he can't discuss, says it's going well.
• Secret Headquarters is taking over Simon's zine and merch distribution. Meggandmogg.com will be used to sell high-end art pieces and "some cheaper stuff for less posh art collector wankers. Weird doodles. Dumb shit. Fun stuff."

Honestly, really disappointed by this update. You Will Own Nothing, and You Will Be Happy wasn't my favorite Megg, Mogg, and Owl media, but at least it was something. Oh well, at least I got a new air freshener coming.

How do you all feel about the current state of Megg, Mogg, and Owl?

35 MTF here.

I made the decision to transition about 3 years ago because I'd been dealing with dysphoric feelings since college. They weren't as overwhelming or intense as some people's, but it was unbelievably consistent. So I decided to go on HRT and begin the process of transitioning. I lasted a little over a month.

What happened? I went to a ballgame with my partner, we took a selfie, and I seriously did not like how I looked. To be fair, I was boymoding and hadn't even begun to see any physical changes. But something about that picture just filled me with such self-negativity. All I could think about was how ugly I was and how I'd never be able to pass.

It was horrible. I never had less confidence in myself. I stopped the HRT. Stopped working out (regaining about 15-20 pounds). Did everything I could to bury it all down and just forget about it. I just didn't want to think about it anymore. Then time moved on, and eventually I could think back on that period without the hurt. Unfortunately, now all I could think about was where I'd be if I continued the HRT.

And that hurt about as badly as the day I decided to stop.

It has been a rough couple of years for my identity and self-image. But I managed to work through a lot of those issues. I got back into exercise and routine. Started working on this in therapy again. And the best thing I think I've ever heard in therapy was a question she asked me.

"Do you want to pass or live authentically?"

So I chewed on that for a good long while. But it was a question I really needed to hear, because it reminded me that in almost every other area of my life, I valued authenticity. Yet, I was holding myself to an impossible standard because I was putting way, way too much importance on a picture of myself, basically at step 1 of the MTF journey.

So I'm choosing to live authentically. I'm back on HRT, and I'm once again looking forward to the changes I was excited about a lifetime ago.

Just really needed to get this out to someone who hopefully gets it.