my fiance m33 broke up with me f28 over affair with his boss
my bf of 6 years and fiance of 3 years has broken up with me because he lost all romantic feelings towards me. I’m struggling to process what just happened in my 6 year relationship. We were engaged, planning a wedding for next year, living together since 5 yrs, raising a puppy together, and at the beginning of March he was still texting me things like “I can’t wait for you to come home, i love you over everything‘
One week later he suddenly distanced himself out of nowhere started questioning our relationship, asking things like “when was the last time we looked at each other with passion?” and saying there are couples where the romantic feelings never fade after 10 years. Then came weeks of emotional chaos: silence, distancing, telling me constantly “we’re going to break up,” blaming me for everything, saying his feelings weren’t enough anymore, but at the same time crying, hugging me for a long time, saying it could be the biggest mistake of his life and that it would break his heart if he ever saw me with another man.
What makes this even harder is that he got very close to his boss who is married 14yrs and has an 8yr old son, she is a life coach. I suppose she coached him and since then he talks about “180 degree life changes,” tarot cards, the universe, soul connections etc. Nobody recognizes him anymore — not even his family or friends. He suddenly changed completely: expensive shopping, new furniture, luxury hotels, obsession with work/gym, emotionally detached from everyone. And now she has basically replaced me and moved in a few days after i left our apartment. she moved in with her 8 year old son.
He says I “didn’t fight for him enough” because I packed my things really fast and left, but I left after weeks of emotional terror, being screamed at, ignored, and constantly told we were over.
I genuinely feel like I lost someone overnight and I still can’t understand how someone can go from planning a future with you to building a whole new life with someone else within weeks. Has anyone experienced something similar? Is this limerence/affair fog/identity crisis or am I just trying to make sense of something impossible? he always lied when people asked if it has anything to do with her. how can you forget a 6yr relationship that fast?