u/Belissari

I am asking because I am gay and have been on a few dates with 2 different Turkish men. Both of these men adamantly claimed to be straight which confused the hell out of me because I just assumed they were gay since I met them on a gay dating app.

Not to be too graphic but from their perspective it seemed like they believed that as long as they were giving presents as opposed to receiving them, they could still consider themselves to be straight. From a Western perspective this makes no sense, if you’re male and attracted to another male, you are gay.

After talking to some people in real life and they seem to claimed that in Turkish culture that’s how it is, so basically if you’re active/top you are considered straight but if you’re passive/bottom then you are considered gay.

Is it true that these men are straight or are they hypocrites and in denial about their own sexuality?

I don’t feel comfortable confronting my dad at this point, I’m curious if anyone else if in a similar situation.

I found that he follows and engages with a lot of right wing White nationalist content on instagram. He even started bragging about it in front of me, friends and family members, talking about how he gets a lot of likes on his comments on these instagram pages.

I don’t really even know what more to say about this but how can you subscribe to White nationalism when you have mixed race children?

There was a recent post here where someone was simply sharing their thoughts and experiences on being mistaken for another ethnicity, then they received multiple replies mocking them.

“Here come the lightskin circlejerk”

"Bro i swear people think im italian or hispanic all the time bro"

“Weird flex but okay”

“My friend's wife is 100% convinced everyone thinks she's Spanish... delulu her, and delulu you for believing it. lol”

These are some of the replies mocking them.

It’s not a flex to be mistaken as another ethnicity and it shouldn’t be assumed that someone sharing their experience is trying to flex.

There’s been a lot of chatter on this sub about the rising anti-Indian sentiment in Canada but outside of this sub I hear much more news about anti-Muslim and general anti-multiculturalism sentiment coming out of the UK.

The tension in the UK seems much more serious than Canada based on what I’m hearing. Talks about sending back anyone who has not assimilated into British society have become normalised, granted I know there was always anti-immigrant sentiment around but it wasn’t as strong just a decade ago.

There also seems to be quite a few prominent conservative British Desis who I hear agreeing with anti-multiculturalism, but would that be at their own detriment?

For British Desis, what’s life like in the current social and political climate? Is it as bad as the media makes it out to be?

Homophobia was a bigger problem for me when I was in high school. I went to an all boys private school, it was mostly White but for the most part I think being gay made you a bigger target for bullies in my school.

For the most part race didn’t really come up, only maybe twice did I have a racist experience. I am half Indian and somewhat ambiguous but not really White-passing.

I had one incident in school where everyone found out I liked boys and then overnight it was like the entire school turned on me. I went from having a perfectly happy life to living in a horrifying nightmare.

I was mentally, verbally and physically bullied on a daily basis for a period. The playground at recess and lunch time was one of the scariest places. One time two guys held me down whilst another assaulted me. The weird thing is that some guys in my school would bully me in an almost homoerotic way. One time they grabbed me and rubbed their crotch in my face, also they’d say things like “wanna suck my cock”.

The bullying got so bad that I ended up leaving the school. I became very depressed and suicidal but thankfully I overcame it and am in a better place.

Unfortunately I find there is also some racism within the gay community itself, so I don’t feel like I truly fit in. I have had many good experiences with gay men but I also get racist vibes from some. Most gay men I meet don’t realise that I’m half Indian when they approach me and sometimes act disappointed when they find out what I am.

Anyone else have any experiences to share?

A few houses down from where I live, there was a house of mostly young men in their 20s living together. They sometimes throw big parties which are very loud and some of my neighbours had a problem with that, which I don’t blame them because it annoyed me as well and it was consistently their house which produced the most noise pollution.

A few of my neighbours made some negative comments about them and mentioned them being Lebanese. One older guy in my area who’s lived here for a long time even said “this area has changed a lot, it used to be very Aussie” and by that he means there’s a lot of Lebanese people who live in the area today compared to years ago.

I guess because they were “wogs” and causing a problem people just assumed they were Lebanese, but it turned out that they were actually Croatian.

It made me realise how prejudice people in Sydney are towards Lebanese. Over the years I’ve heard lots of negative comments about “Lebos” from people and I remember hearing stories of Italian and Greek men being attacked because White Australians mistook them for Lebanese during the Cronulla Riots.

Now I wonder, are people just assuming anyone who looks like a “wog” and displays bad behaviour must be Lebanese?

Conversation about Indian hate starts at 46:26.

Even many Indians who are not mixed get the same comments and I feel like it’s because Indians have been so mocked in recent years that people view Indians as a caricature, so they can’t comprehend when they encounter Indians who don’t look like a caricature.