u/Blue_Steel_415

Yes - I know there is a specific subreddit dedicated to this but its not super active, and I'm wondering how many FA's specifically daydream to this extent, since most of us lack any sort of meaningful relationships.

Its embarrassing to say, but I spend time daydreaming not just about dating, but dating celebrities, being famous/a celebrity, living an extravagant lifestyle, inserting myself into characters on tv shows/movies I watch, having conversations. Sometimes I even say things outloud without realizing it. I know... Its cringe times a million....

I'm in introvert, and can go a few days without leaving my apt. In addition to major depression disorder/anxiety I have chronic fatigue, and while I'm not necessarily bedridden 24/7 I spend a lot of time laying down just exhausted. Icing on the cake? I've been unemployed for over a year, so plenty of time on my hands.

Do any of you maladaptive daydream? Whats the craziest thing you've dreamt of or gotten so into?

For me? dating a celebrity, being a DJ, being famous, having lots a friends and the popular kid (I was and still am a loner), being super successful. I cringe as I type all this stuff.

And obviously it goes way deeper, its not just dating a celebrity its playing out scenarios of how we met, things we talk about, conversations, headlines in the news. Its just so......pathetic.

The worst part is that I've been unemployed for almost 2 years, so I have pleeeenty of time to do this. Its basically become my coping mechanism for being a depressed introvert and not having anything else to do.

I guess I've always done it even when I was employed, just not to this extent now that I don't have a job to go to.

Wish I was joking. 1.5 years in. Countless applications. LinkedIn messages. Networking calls, zooms, etc. Very few interviews. And after my latest rejection my eyes started to water up and it just happened. First time in maybe 5+ years. Kind of laughing about it now as I write this, but its one of those awkward, embarrassing laughs.

Feels like it just gets worse as each day passes honestly. Just kind of spiraling with anxiety overload (yes, I see a therapist but it does not help with the negative thoughts and self doubt). The typical "enjoy this time off" "get outside" "pick up new hobbies" only lasts for the first 6 months. Then its just feeling anxious, worthless 24/7. I check my email probably like 1000x a day hoping to see something only to be disappointed.

How are people surviving emotionally? Not talking about financially because thats a whole separate nightmare.