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u/BrianHitByCar

r/Bombstrap r/cooladam r/CirclejerkSopranos r/beachboyscirclejerk r/okbuddycinephile r/BobDylanCircleJerk r/superseriousfamilyguy
▲ 61 r/Bombstrap

"Your cologne smells bad."

It's spelt 'colon', and I don't want it to smell good. Why do you think I made this big hole in my colomosty bag for shit to leak through? Stupid bitch.

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u/BrianHitByCar — 3 days ago
▲ 50 r/cooladam

I am not in danger of predatory homosexuals, Tyler. I am the predatory homosexual. A twink opens his door and gets molested, and you think that of me? No, I am the one who tops 😠

u/BrianHitByCar — 8 days ago
▲ 156 r/cooladam

Type Two Diabetes? More like 'Hawk Two-ah Diabeatin' my dick!' 😂 Anyone else use r/cooladam humor to cope with their diabetes diagnosis?

u/BrianHitByCar — 9 days ago
▲ 24 r/cooladam

When the prostitute you're lying next to realises they've hit rock bottom and starts crying, but you don't know what to do except pretend not to notice while desperately searching for family guy on the hotel TV

u/BrianHitByCar — 9 days ago
▲ 103 r/cooladam

'straight' men who are "only at this gay orgy ironically" when you ask them to pass the penis:

u/BrianHitByCar — 9 days ago
▲ 181 r/CirclejerkSopranos

Can any Sopranos TCG players explain why my first-edition Mikey Palmice card is just a completely different guy? Did I get scammed out of $2600?

u/BrianHitByCar — 12 days ago
▲ 6 r/cooladam

Malt Shoppe, anyone? 2 greasy cats sharin' 1 milkshake, eye contact while we lick cream off of our lips, maybe lick each other's lips because we're 'cool cats,' and real cats help lick each other clean, right? Not because we're queer, I ain't some fuckin' homo. Maybe touch penises after?

u/BrianHitByCar — 12 days ago
▲ 124 r/cooladam

Does this sub have any other INTJ pimps, or do I be the only white-ass motherfucker around who likes to slap the shit outta his hoes AND solve complex mathematical equations?

u/BrianHitByCar — 12 days ago
▲ 96 r/superseriousfamilyguy

In public he may act like a 'Family Guy,' but behind closed doors, Peter Griffin is nothing but an abuser. God, this makes me sick...

u/BrianHitByCar — 12 days ago
▲ 9 r/cooladam

Headline wasn't lying! Does anyone know how to safely wipe their dried 'delightment' from a work laptop?

u/BrianHitByCar — 12 days ago