I posted something personal and the story has enough details that if someone from my life sees it, they will know it is me. It’s says there’s 16 shared on my post but I don’t know exactly what this means.
Did 16 people share it to outside sources from Reddit? Or did the repost it on Reddit? I’m not sure. I want to know before I delete my post. Thank you
I hope no one that knows me sees this as I’ve been advised before to dump him but still hesitate every time I think about it. I always give people relationship advise and well I don’t think I’m doing very well in my own relationship.
This is going to be a long read.
We have been together for four years and during this time I’ve learned a lot and thought it was him that was teaching me these good things. but now I’m realizing well I was also so young so maybe I grew up throughout the relationship.
He has been on a trip for two months now and it’s now been 5 weeks since we have not spoken a word. The last conversation we had was when I told him I feel like you’re being distant and it’s really hurting me, sometimes I feel like blocking you so the Atleast I can tell myself that he’s not reaching out because he can’t. To this he said “block me”. Well I didn’t block him and said let’s wait it out and see if he even tried to call or text but NOTHING. I don’t think he’s cheating as he’s travelling with some family members so please don’t bring up that theory. If anything, I just think he’s sick of me and doesn’t really like me.
While he’s been gone, I’ve been taking care of his business, driving his family around, dealing with his customers day and night and spending so much money but he doesn’t even know this and I know it won’t matter to him as he has never appreciated anything I do for him.
Anyways, this distance is now making me think about deeper issues we have and I’m questioning everything.
I’ve never been married or had kids but he has done both.
Most of our relationship has not been romantic, extravagant, joyful or included anything like date nights or trips. He is not financially stable so when I even mention dinner date he gets triggered. I used to ask and then I stopped completely after I noticed he is fearful of spending money. The few times we went on a date, I paid. I honestly didn’t mind it cause what’s $60-$80 going to do for me anyway.
He is not affectionate in private but when we’re walking outside or go to an event together, he tells me that he feels pride that I’m beside him cause other men look at how good I look and that makes them respected him more.
I have explained to him that I’m young and I appreciate romantic gestures- even giving me a unique looking rock off the road. He just starts an argument every time. He doesn’t believe in birthdays or Valentine’s Day so forget about literally anything romantic.
I make good money and have helped him a lot with child support, credit card payments, some other big purchases. All I have asked in return is for him to hold me and look at me with love and compassion in his eyes. Because he knows this is the one thing I want from him, it’s the first thing he withholds when he wants to hurt me.
Why am I still with him?
- I see him as a kind person and that’s rare these days. He wakes up before me and clears snow off my car and heats it up for me, when I’m tired from work he massages my feet, when I’m tired-he makes me food, anything I want he does his best to make it happen. He also gives me great advise that has helped me maintain relationships with friends and survive through tough University and work life. I guess I just appreciate having a friend.
-I also have built an attachment to his family (it’s honestly one sided) I call them and make them food and stuff but they don’t really initiate anything. I just still find it hard to never speak to them again.
- This is the longest relationship I have ever been in so naturally I feel like if I let go, it’s a failure on my part as I’ll think I did not try hard enough to overcome these challenges. He insists on getting married and having kids but I can’t envision my husband being non-chalant and acting so cold.
Thinking of what he does to make my life easier
-Throughout the relationship, he has paid for my car insurance $120 and I also live with him so I haven’t had to pay rent ( I do own a house I’m renting to others). He also helped me with setting up and organizing my business. He also takes care of my car needs. That’s about it.
I guess my point is, I’m financially stable and do well on my own, all I wanted was love and I have not gotten it. I told his brother that him and I haven’t spoken in 5 weeks and he confronted him and his response was “ don’t worry, when I’m back- I’ll fix everything and I know she will understand”. What the hell does that even mean?
I take it as he takes me for a clown and thinks I can just move on from being ignored for 5 weeks.
Which one gives me more points? I have been stuck on 4points for a couple days now and can’t join a lot of groups I would like to
We are looking to open a business- very sure on opening a cafe.
For anyone who has been to Mokha Cafe in Edmonton, that’s the vibe we’re looking to go with. Somewhere to relax, work, or study and socialize.
There are more than 20 of those cafes all around Edmonton now and we are looking to see if Red Deer would appreciate or even need something of this sort.
Any advise or suggestion on location, pricing or literal anything would be greatly appreciated.
Even if it’s just a simple “don’t do it”
Thank you in advance!