u/BrosephDwalin

Own a cheirosiphon for home defense, since that's what emperor Constantine intended. Four barbaroi break into my house. "Malaka" As I grab my late Roman ridge helmet and hand-siphon. Burn a skouton sized scar through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my composite recurve bow on the second man, miss him entirely because of it's high draw weight and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the onager mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with clay pots full of Greek Fire, "O stavros nika" the Greek Fire crisps two men in the flame, the breaking and extra clay shards set off car alarms. Raise Spatha and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since Spatha wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as emperor Constantine intended.

\> Don't terrorize the Nika protestors, focus on green/blue teams

\> Demand John the Sanguinary not to be a retard with Italy

\> Don't siege Nisbis, take it immideatly

\> Zurge rush Ctesiphon to cut off Persian grain

\> Ally with the White Huns against the Sassanids

\> Ignore the Caucasus