Divorce and remarriage in 40’s while seeking Jesus first.
Does anybody else feel like it’s almost difficult to do both things?
Since my divorce, I have worked so hard to chase Jesus to be his bride to devote my life to him. I have studied deep meditation. I have studied his word. I have studied many books in theology and in supportive Christianity. I have devoted life to prayer to conversation and the following his word and being obedient, I want to prepare myself to be a proper Christian man in a marriage. I’m often overwhelmed by trying to find a wife while chasing Jesus
I know some people are gonna say that maybe that’s God sign that I should remain single but I truly don’t feel like God wants me to remain single. It even says in the word for truly, it is not good for men to be alone that’s why he created Eve for us and I know that that’s returning the sexual immorality, but I no longer struggle with loss or sexual immorality stuff as I did when I was younger I want a companion I want somebody to pray with. I want somebody to pray over. I want somebody to cook for I want somebody to wash dishes for I want somebody to discuss my feelings and to listen to their feelings, and to really be there to support them in their good days and their bad days to not have them be a crotch or for me to be a crutch for us to be an inner lot Christian support system for one another they always pushed each other closer to the Lord.
In some ways, I know this is how the Lord doesn’t want me to be single because I think I need that person who loves Jesus more than they will ever love me so that they help push me towards him harder and I want to be there for someone else too.
This is not a post stating how hard it is to be single or that I’m looking for somebody. It’s a discussion based on the struggle of dating while also trying to fill the heaviness that is a disciple of the Lord and I don’t want to date to date, I want to date with the intention of marriage. Someone who can fulfill everything that a proverbs 31 woman would fulfill just as I would want to fulfill everything the Bible says I should do as a husband I want to exhibit the fruits of the spirit and have the overflow of my heart pour out so lovingly that my wife is overwhelmed by love loved is everything and I want to share that I want to love on somebody.
But again, I reiterate that it is difficult to find that person plus find them close and have them fulfill the word. No one’s perfect, but I feel like I put so much pressure on myself to be obedient to the word I want somebody who is doing just the same.
Is it just me or does everyone struggle do women struggle with trying to find somebody talking to someone doing all that and then feeling like it’s all overwhelming?