u/CashComplete8980

How can this help with custody arrangements? What proof do I need other than pictures of the pills and alcohol?

She’s got no job/income , history of bad credit. My lawyer mentioned there’s a good chance her side will ask for the house and then sell once kids are out of HS. She’d probably foreclose on it before then.

I’d rather just sell it , split the assets, but At least one of us would need to find a place within the same area so kids can stay at the SAME school district (which is high on my list of priorities) cause my kids are well established in the schools. Anyone else do something like this?

Can a spouse stay in the marital home after the divorce without buying the other spouse out , but instead agree to sell it once the kids graduate High School?

Can a spouse stay in marital home after divorce and not have to buy the other out , but instead agree to sell it once the kids graduate high school?

Just seeing if anyone else can relate.

Father of 3 , sole income earner. She never really worked a job throughout the marriage. My lawyer said if your ex really wants to make things bad, she can ask to stay in the house with the kids as a part of the divorce settlement.

Got some hang ups about this obviously but would be better for the kids staying in same district etc. on the other hand I would want to stay in the house and she can get an apartment. I honestly don’t think she can maintain everything with the house (money wise)

All that being said I don’t know what she’s going for yet but we’ll see.

I always saw us selling the house and at least one of us getting a place within the district so kids can stay in same school

My stbxw thinks once we’re divorced she will move back to her hometown with our children. I’m not willing to let this happen.

My question is this point of contention dead on arrival in the view of the lawyers and squashed easily or is this gonna cost me and arm and a leg to fight her from moving away with kids?

I’m not sure how to feel right now. One minute im up and positive about the future, next minute im down thinking im about to lose everything.

Long story short im 45 been married for 16 years and have 3 children (15,13,12).

My wife and I have basically been divorced without the paperwork for a couple years now all while living together. We don’t talk , or even look at each other. Roommates show more affection to one another than we do. To me the house is toxic because of this. I feel like our kids know it too and feel it.

We’ve been doing things separately such as holidays including mothers and Father’s Day. She started that crap and i begged her to just fake it at least for the holidays for the kids sake but she wouldn’t. I’m sure the kids are all confused by this-it kills me.

She just filed a couple of days ago- it’s like we were pushing each other to do so . I was going to hold out till kids were older but she had enough- maybe it’s a blessing in disguise because I felt stuck and in too deep and my mental health is definitely taking a toll. I would let my mental health deteriorate to stay together a little longer- yes I know definitely not healthy.

She’s been a SAHM and I’ve been the income earner. I have fears about what everything will look like financially when the process is complete. I know I’ll probably be paying for her lawyer fees and she’ll get half of everything- she’s never been motivated to work. I’ll probably have some debt after this (never been in debt ) I have fears about downsizing from our house to smaller apartments. Im hoping we can keep the kids in their current school district. Just a lot of unknowns and it’s overwhelming at times.

All this said we were unhealthy the way we were living. I would wish that she would find a side romance fall in love and never come home- that never happened. But that’s where my head was at.

If I wanted a divorce so bad why am I feeling this pit in my stomach now that it has started? I will fight for nothing less than 50/50 custody. Sometimes I feel I can handle it other times I feel like I’ll break. A quote thet helps me is “if you’re going through hell keep on going “ Although maybe it’s not hell and maybe it’s meant to be. Guess I’ll know when the dust settles.

I think the kids deserve to see their parents happy again, either on their own or maybe we find a new loving relationship and they can witness that.

Thanks for listening. Any input is much appreciated. Guess I’m part of the divorced dad demographic now. Never thought my life would turn out like this as I’m sure a lot of you feel. Hope everyone is taking care of themselves, it’s great to see some inspirational stories on here.

Currently contacting a family member who’s an attorney