u/Cautious-Ad-6277

why does this happen?

how can I fix it?

This actually happened a while ago, possibly up to a year. I'd only been saved about 6 months at the time. I put it out of my head, and never told anyone, but I've been thinking about a lot of stuff recently.

I get hit on a lot, and everywhere I go the men are always "nice" to me. Before Jesus I just accepted this as my due, but now it makes me a little sad.
When I first got saved, everyone was so lovely and welcoming in our church, that it was sad for me to realise that I had to ignore a lot of the single men, because they were just trying to hit on me.

Anyway around this time this guy from Church approached me, wanted to ask me out. And I wasn't in any place, I was about ready to give birth, and he gave me what I later came to recognise as "Christian Chat-Up lines" and said that he felt The Lord was telling him to be there for me and support me (LOL, right) and then dropped the zinger that he was "seeing someone, but wasn't 'engaged or anything'," and that he would break-up with her to be with me.
After I told him no, he didn't bother me much or drop any more zingers, but after the baby he did try to chat me up a few more times.

I haven't much thought about it, but he's now engaged to the woman, and I wonder if I should tell her.

I'm a relatively new Christian, so I'm really struggling with this. Are these just guidelines, "spiritual talk", or are they direct words from God.

I was raised Catholic, and always considered myself a good girl. But I was also raised to be confident, independent, and to care for my body and appearance. I'm tall, have slightly olive skin, and have been blessed with natural beauty. I started modelling when I was in high school, and I've had a pretty successful career. I've always loved clothes, jewellery, and nice things, and my career has allowed me to indulge in those things.

I always tried to keep my priorities straight, but I'm not afraid to admit that I was seduced by the lifestyle, the admiration, and the glamour. I fell in love with a man I shouldn't have, and we had a tumultuous couple of years together. When I was pregnant with our 2nd child, he assaulted me whilst high on drugs, and I fled, returning to my home city.
One night I was out trying to enjoy a night on the town with some old friends. A bit hard when I was like 5 months pregnant, and couldn't drink. I looked around, and it was like in a movie, like I was somehow seeing everything around me differently. I went outside and just wept.

This kid came up to me and he was handing out flyers for his church or something, and he gave me some line about Jesus, but mostly I was tired and sad and weepy, so I followed him up to the church. That night I gave my life to Jesus, and everthing changed for me.

I finally feel that my life is on track, and that I'm where God wants me to be. I am blessed with two beautiful kids, I have a nice apartment that fortunately I held onto, plenty of money. I don't really need to work, but I'm partners in a boutique that's already so profitable we're looking to expand.
More importantly I actively involved in my church, I'm active in Prayer meetings and Bible studies, and I support a couple of charities. I'm still a strong independent woman, and I'd already made up my mind that I was going to raise my kids on my own, but now Jesus is the head of my family.

Then boom, out of nowhere, I get this "prophesy" or Word of Knowledge, that I'm to marry this kid at church.
He helps out in the nursery sometimes, and he was holding my boy while I sorted out my daughter, so maybe that's how the Minister got confused. But he wanted to pray for us, and I felt drawn to go up, but I thought he would pray for my family just me and the kids. But the guy followed me up and so the minister prayed for us all.

So I don't know what to do. Because this feels like its from God, and I want to be obedient. But he's a kid. I'm guessing he's like 18~19, and I'm going to be 30 soon.
I was going to say that he's not my type, except he wasn't my type before I gave my heart to Jesus, and I don't know what my type is now.

And I don't know how to move forward. Do I ask him out, start dating, what?

There are a few things to mention:

This was a visiting minister who apparently has a reputation of hearing from God. Both times when he preached and prayed for people he had Words of Knowledge that were apparently very accurate.

I spoke with our Pastor, who is somebody I trust and I believe does hear from God. Whilst cautioning me not to jump to conclusions, he shared that whilst they were praying for us, that God had shown him visions of our wedding.
Our Pastor seems to believe that what God shows him is a possible future, sort of like what our wedding could look like IF we decided to get married. He thought this was sometime in the future because the guy was wearing a Military uniform. Also, that he was surprised that the wedding was not in our Church, but he gave a detailed description of the Chapel and it's location.

I went to church this morning, wondering about how I could even talk to this kid. Instead I found this young man. It was both awkward and yet not.
We spoke after church and some more things came to light.

1. I've not thought much about getting married, but if I'm honest, I could not imagine getting married in our Church. It's a converted warehouse in an Industrial estate. If I had my choice, I would be married in an old traditional chapel
2. Our pastor said something very specific about the location that it was the joining of two rivers. I've never really thought about such things, but this guy Knows the rivers well, as he grew up sailing, What our Pastor described is the Sailing Club where he grew up sailing, and on the hill above, exactly as described, is the preserved Chapel from an old hospital that used to be there.
3. Turns out he's in the Reserves and already has a Military uniform,

I'm a relatively new Christian. I am almost 30 but only gave my heart to Jesus around 18 months ago.
Previously I tried to be "good", but I did not live a Godly life.

I have been doing my best to live for him. I'm active in our Church, I participate in Prayer and Bible studies, support our Women's Ministry, and personally support a couple of charities. I am raising my two young kids on my own, and was committed to doing that as a single mother.

I was never married to my partner and he was a violent drug user and we'd split up before I came to Jesus. He's on the other side of the country, and has no interest in his kids.
I'm not really clear on what the Bible says about my situation, but I was comfortable in my choice to make Jesus the head of my household.

But can I be honest and say that I miss having sex. I know its wrong to have sex outside of marriage. But I think God may have opened a door to me possibly getting married.
Part of my decision to stay single has been that I get so much attention and I don't want to deal with guys lusting after me.

I don't really know what I should be looking for in a husband. I don't need a provider or protector. Is it wrong that I wonder what he might be like in bed?

I am near 30 but only came to Jesus a year and a half ago. Prior to having my kids, I had a very successful career as a model. Whilst all the work I did was in Fashion, I have to admit that some of it was not edifying.
Sadly you can google me and find plenty of images, some of which I am ashamed of.

I still have my looks and take care of myself, and there is plenty of commercial work around. Since it's often lifestyle related, there is work available at every age and life-stage. There's not as much in my home town, but there's enough. It could be anything from modelling clothes for a catalogue or website, or advertising a product.
I still get occasional contacts from agencies and reps.

I don't really need the money but feel I should be supporting myself.

We had a visiting speaker at our church. He ran some seminars whilst he was here, and Last Sunday he preached twice. He had words of knowledge, and invited those people up for Prayer where he and the Ministry team prayed for them. Some of the people I know, and his Words of Knowledge seemed spot on.

So last Sunday Night, he said to our Pastor, is it ok if I bring up the young family down the back and pray for them?
Everyone, including me and the lady next to me, turned around to look, only there was nobody behind me!

I'm 20, still at uni, and haven't had a girlfriend for a some months now. I'm a but weird, I like babies. I've babysat my niece, and my nephew, and I'm on the roster to help out in crèche. So yeah I had been helping out and holding her son (there's no crèche at night) so that might be why he got confused.

So after the confusion and laughter had subsided, he asked again if it was ok, and said that God had shown him us together.
I don't know why, it was all very awkward, but she went up for prayer, and I felt obligated to follow. They prayed over us, and he had a word about us being together and "leading people to Christ."
I was just grateful that none of my family was there that night.

I barely know this lady except to speak to in Church, and I sometimes watch her kids in crèche. She has a little girl, and a small boy. She came to our church about a year ago, and have her heart to the Lord. She was pregnant at the time, and I sent flowers (with others) when the baby was born, but that's about it.
I've heard she used to be a model, and I can believe it. She's incredibly beautiful, and always well-dressed, made-up, hair done, etc, etc. I'm no expert but I'd say her clothes (and her kids') are expensive and she drives a Mercedes. (And I've heard lives in an expensive part of town). I guess she's late 20's.

This would all be very weird, but laughable and funny, if it weren't for a few things.

Late last year, some visiting preachers prayed for us all, and one had a word of prophecy about me becoming a father. Since I was already falling out with my GF, and had no intentions towards marriage, I just took is as a "one day" kind of thing.

My Pastor spoke to me this week, and he was telling me not to assume things or rush into anything, and that I needed to pray and hear from The Lord. And at first I just assumed he was giving me the obvious advice to not read anything into this. Except he told me that whilst praying for us, God had shown him our wedding.
The only other thing I should mention is that when he said was speaking to me, I said something about being only still at uni and not able to afford to get married for years, and he said "oh I don't think you'd have to worry about money."

I can't stop thinking about this and I am very confused. To be clear I'm 20 and have got a couple of years before I'm even earning a graduates salary. She's very nice, but I barely know her to speak to. I like babies, but I'm not ready to be a father.
I've had a girlfriend, but this is a woman. And talk bout being out of my league.