u/Charming-Chair-7838

I know, I know I’m sorry and that is mean.

But we both know it’s true.

Honestly, what do you bring to the table? Not a g d thing. Absolutely nothing. You actually take so much more than you could or would ever give.

Even the sex sucked in the end. When I stopped putting in all the work, dressing up, acting interesting and interested… and it came down to basic animalistic moves and motions and noises and actions… you didn’t do shit. You were a male version of a starfish standing on two awkward feet.

Your whole quiet/ mysterious / deep / confident front is just that, a sham… a front.

Let’s be real, you are so insecure it’s embarrassing.

Your speech impediment keeps you quiet, but I KNOW inside that small *large, oddly shaped* head of yours that there is so much more going on that you wish you could include and participate into the conversations.

That’s why I can’t, absolutely can not fathom why I am so sad. Why I can’t stop crying.

It’s been a little over 3 months since we spent that last night together. The one before the blow up. And 2 months since we’ve seen each other. And other than a couple emails strictly about Buisness, haven’t spoken in just as long.

And before you say—or think— (because we both know that quick witty comeback is just gonna stay stuck on the tip of your tongue) that I’m just mean or hateful and that’s why you couldn’t be the person I needed and was told I would get… I wasn’t always like this. This is what you get when someone finally matches what they’ve been given. Mine just with words, instead of acts. I respect my body and self too much. Trust me I thought about the physical revenge option.

I don’t know why this is messing with me so bad… I’ll be so sad for a few minutes and really feel it…in my core. That hurt. That pull. That ache.

The one that only you have ever been able to take away.

I want to reach out and ask if you could try just one more time? We have a spot for ourselves now. Baby worked hard and I got it for us. I sacrificed to save for this. Because I thought it was the ticket to our life together.

And then a few minutes later, I remember how much I hate you, you are a piece of shit.

And you were right about one thing, I am too good for you. Your words not mine.

That’s all for now.

I know you’re looking around here, I accidentally gave my safe vent place away. Why not post? A couple key words or phrases or even emojis could clarify it’s us. Without being damnable.

Anyway…

Do you wanna come see me?

💚🐊

I know, I know, I’m sorry and that is mean.

But we both know it’s true.

Honestly, what do you bring to the table? Not a g d thing. Absolutely nothing. You actually take so much more than you could or would ever give.

Even the sex sucked in the end. When I stopped putting in all the work, dressing up, acting interesting and interested… and it came down to basic animalistic moves and motions and noises and actions… you didn’t do shit. You were a male version of a starfish standing on two awkward feet.

Your whole quiet/ mysterious / deep / confident front is just that, a sham… a front.

Let’s be real, you are so insecure it’s embarrassing.

Your speech impediment keeps you quiet, but I KNOW inside that small large head of yours that there is so much more going on. That you wish you could include and participate in the conversations.

That’s why I can’t, absolutely can not fathom why I am so sad. Why I can’t stop crying.

It’s been a little over 3 months since we spent that last night together. The one before the blow up. And 2 months since we’ve seen each other. And other than a couple emails strictly about Buisness, haven’t spoken in just as long.

And before you say—or think— (because we both know that quick witty comeback is just gonna stay stuck on the tip of your tongue) that I’m just mean or hateful and that’s why you couldn’t be the person I needed and was told I would get… I wasn’t always like this. This is what you get when someone finally matches what they’ve been given. Mine just with words, instead of acts. I respect my body and self too much. Trust me I thought about the physical revenge option.

I don’t know why this is messing with me so bad… I’ll be so sad for a few minutes and really feel it…in my core. That hurt. That pull. That ache.

The one that only you have ever been able to take away.

I want to reach out and ask if you could try just one more time? We have a spot for ourselves now. Baby worked hard and I got it for us. I sacrificed to save for this. Because I thought it was the ticket to our life together.

And then a few minutes later, I remember how much I hate you, you are a piece of shit.

And you were right about one thing, I am too good for you. Your words not mine.

That’s all for now.

I know you’re looking around here, I accidentally gave my safe vent place away. Why not post? A couple key words or phrases or even emojis could clarify it’s us. Without being damnable.

Anyway…

Do you wanna come see me?

💚🐊

I went ahead and got a nicer one… well, nicer than that old stick one from dollar general we got for like $20 bucks back in 2020 lol.

It’s a 2 in 1. So it’s my vacuum and my mop. It. is. a. mother. fckn. GAME CHANGER!!

It really really works all at once. So the 🌊 could spill some food. Dry mixed in with her wet. And spilled it on top of her water thats already gotten everywhere… (hang with me here lol gotta give you the visual)

And I can literally suck up the hard stuff (😉) and it will mop at the same time. And it gets it all. Every bit. And the floor is actually clean. Like my floors don’t just look clean now, they feel clean.

Anyway, every time I use it I think of you. I know you’d love it. I mean it’s no Dyson.. but a girls gotta start somewhere.

The only thing is that you have to make sure to rinse out and clean the 3-4 parts that move and hold the dirty water after you use it every time. But still so worth it. It definitely beats sweeping, then collecting as much as you can (never all of it) with a dustpan. Then making the mop water, then mopping… lol you get the idea I don’t need to spell it out.

God I fucking miss you. But we were never real. I miss my hallucination of a husband and a life I so desperately wanted.

💚 (ex) wife

I went ahead and got a nicer one… well, nicer than that old stick one from dollar general we got for like $20 bucks back in 2020 lol.

It’s a 2 in 1. So it’s my vacuum and my mop. It. is. a. mother. fckn. GAME CHANGER!!

It really really works all at once. So the 🌊 could spill some food. Dry mixed in with her wet. And spilled it on top of her water thats already gotten everywhere… (hang with me here lol gotta give you the visual)

And I can literally suck up the hard stuff (😉) and it will mop at the same time. And it gets it all. Every bit. And the floor is actually clean. Like my floors don’t just look clean now, they feel clean.

Anyway, every time I use it I think of you. I know you’d love it. I mean it’s no Dyson.. but a girls gotta start somewhere.

The only thing is that you have to make sure to rinse out and clean the 3-4 parts that move and hold the dirty water after you use it every time. But still so worth it. It definitely beats sweeping, then collecting as much as you can (never all of it) with a dustpan. Then making the mop water, then mopping… lol you get the idea I don’t need to spell it out.

God I fucking miss you. But we were never real. I miss my hallucination of a husband and a life I so desperately wanted.

💚 (ex) wife

I went ahead and got a nicer one… well, nicer than that old stick one from dollar general we got for like $20 bucks back in 2020 lol.

It’s a 2 in 1. So it’s my vacuum and my mop. It. is. a. mother. fckn. GAME CHANGER!!

It really really works all at once. So the 🌊 could spill some food. Dry mixed in with her wet. And spilled it on top of her water thats already gotten everywhere… (hang with me here lol gotta give you the visual)

And I can literally suck up the hard stuff (😉) and it will mop at the same time. And it gets it all. Every bit. And the floor is actually clean. Like my floors don’t just look clean now, they feel clean.

Anyway, every time I use it I think of you. I know you’d love it. I mean it’s no Dyson.. but a girls gotta start somewhere.

The only thing is that you have to make sure to rinse out and clean the 3-4 parts that move and hold the dirty water after you use it every time. But still so worth it. It definitely beats sweeping, then collecting as much as you can (never all of it) with a dustpan. Then making the mop water, then mopping… lol you get the idea I don’t need to spell it out.

God I fucking miss you. But we were never real. I miss my hallucination of a husband and a life I so desperately wanted.

💚 (ex) wife