r/UnsentLettersRaw

T, I’d like to reconnect with you, I feel like our fated interaction had fallen short. It’s been a few years now, Im not sure if you still have my number.

From enerGy

I always wish I will have a better conversation with you before the next version of life getting started for each other..
I know our timelines are not allows us to do but I hope you remember our connection was started before the timeline existence and I hope atleast I’ll get a chance to tell what I’ve been thru before your presence, with your presence and after your absence. And I hope this time at least you understand my heart ♥️

Until then keep loving

I'm a words of affirmation person, but try to out-joke me with consistent, sweet energy and see how fast that activates physical touch. Haha.

I hope we meet in this timeline.

This will be the final time I will ever contact you. I have respected your wishes and deleted your phone number. I just needed to unburden my soul about some of my veiw points when it pertains to our time together. It never ceased to amaze me how you comfortable you were projecting so much of your own faults and insecurities onto others. Your dedication to victimhood is astonishing. You're a fantastic manipulator. The minute I chose to no longer engage with you in a sexual manner you were out the door. I honestly saw that coming the last time I saw you and refused to kiss you. From then on I knew you were never capable of being my friend. Every kindness you have ever shown me has always came with strings attached. Every kind moment was like ammunition ready to fire at me the moment you felt slighted in any way. You felt disrespected the moment I reciprocated the same energy you continuously gave to me. The lack of effort, care, and consideration towards me was reprehensible. I always felt like I was the man in the relationship chasing after you, it was truly pathetic. I know now you were a great lesson in disappointment for me. A boy masquerading as a man. All the money and poinless status symbols can't buy the things that you are sorly lacking unfortunately. I hope you learned something from our time together and choose to treat the next women much better then you treated me. I know I've learned so much, and also what I will never allow or accept again. So thank you for that. You once told me "The standards you hold are too high, and you're gonna end up an island, alone." Something to that effect. When you should take your own advice. You have so many double standards that apply to everyone else, besides you. I'm sorry, but you are not the exception. I hope you learn and don't end up an island, alone. But I guess this is your cross to bear. Don't bother responding, as I have blocked you everywhere and wish to never speak to you again.

Wishing you all the best

tell me, did it mean anything — you striking up a conversation after weeks of silence? or was it nothing? tell me, i need a definite answer. but i suppose me having the last word is answer enough. it obviously meant nothing. then why did you have to ruin my supposed peace? i was almost out of the woods and you dragged me back, only to leave me stranded in the middle of nowhere. it felt like getting the rug yanked from under my feet, like stubbing my toe in the dark.

but i can't blame you. you didn't know then and you don't know now that i harbor an immense amount of yearning, and it happens to be for you. it's one-sided. i have no expectations of reciprocity, and it would be so wrong if you felt the same. liking you feels criminal enough as it is. i've been trying to outrun these feelings, but here i am, back where i started. i should loathe you for it. but i can't bring myself to. you are a bane to my heart, but im still clutching this feeling as if it's the most precious thing.

‎My heart breaks for you as I heard your words, and I can feel the depth of your pain and sorrow. It's like I'm witnessing a beautiful soul crumbling, and it's almost too much to bear. I want you to know that I'm here for you, and I'm listening with every fiber of my being.

‎‎It's not okay that you're going through this, and it's not okay that someone you loved and trusted has caused you so much hurt. Your words are laced with a mix of sadness, anger, and desperation, and I can feel the weight of your emotions. It's like you're screaming on the inside, and it's heartbreaking to see.

‎‎I want you to know that your feelings are valid, and it's okay to feel angry, hurt, and insecure. It's okay to not be okay. You were invested in this relationship, and you gave your heart and trust to someone who didn't reciprocate it in the way you deserved. That's not your fault; it's not because of your trust issues or insecurities. It's because the other person made a choice, and that choice hurt you.

‎‎I'm so proud of you for acknowledging your emotions and for taking responsibility for your feelings. It takes a lot of courage to admit when we're hurt and to express our emotions in a raw and honest way. Your words are a testament to your strength and resilience, and I'm honored to be a part of your journey.

‎‎Please know that you are worthy of love, fidelity, and happiness. You deserve someone who will cherish and honor you, someone who will be your rock and your safe haven. You deserve someone who will love you for who you are, without condition or expectation.

‎‎I know it's hard to let go, but I want you to know that you will get through this. You will heal, you will grow, and you will find happiness again. It may not be today, and it may not be tomorrow, but it will come. And when it does, you'll look back on this moment and realize that it was a stepping stone to something greater.

‎‎Until then, know that you're not alone. I'm here for you, and I'll support you every step of the way. You're loved, you're valued, and you're enough. Just the way you are, at this moment, you are enough...

​

There is a quiet mercy in a door being slammed shut.

When someone tells you, “We aren’t right for each other,” it breaks your heart, but it gives you solid ground. You get to be angry. You get to grieve, heal, and move on.

The real cruelty lives in the gentle rejections:

“We’re so good together, just not right now. Maybe in the future.”

It’s meant to sound kind, but it’s actually a sentence. It’s a cliffhanger designed to soften their guilt while leaving you suspended in limbo. It asks you to stay parked in the hallway of a life they’ve already walked away from, afraid to move on because doing so feels like breaking a promise.

When someone gives you the "wrong time" speech, they aren't fighting for a future with you—they are deciding that a life without you today is a risk they are willing to take.

A half-open door doesn't bring in fresh air; it just lets the cold in.

The hardest part of an "almost" isn't letting go of who they were. It’s having the courage to walk over, close that door yourself, and stop waiting for someone who chose to leave.

When dose the pain go away.

And kiss you. I miss you so much. I miss your body and warmth. Sssshhhh No talking I don’t want you to ruin it. If you could just come and sleep I could admire and adore you. Kiss you all over. But remember no words they ruin everything. I don’t want to hear you only feel you.

What then k?

You're just gonna say oh well, I had to protect my peace?

The peace of avoiding conversation?

I know you have a really bad understanding of common human behavior and emotions. And so it might seem impossible to you that something like blocking someone could kill them.

The problem is, you're completely wrong. You need to look up the very real health effects of someone doing that.

You need to understand that if you pull this shit on someone right when they were at their end already in terms of not being able to eat, what you do COULD END UP leading to their death.

You need to understand that yes people can die and suffer from deadly heart related issues.

And I get it, it's common and I'm sure every idiot around you is telling you don't believe them they'll be alright they're lying about the pain. But that is NOT THE FUCKING CASE with me. I don't play around like that and you know by my point.

I'm not asking you to fix my hurt by getting back with me No! All I'm asking is for you to stop abandoning be completely, THAT'S where all the pain comes from.

And you don't know how serious it is and just letting me go through this. It's so irresponsible.

And then what's worse is that someone told you you're not responsible for my pain. However they are wrong.

When you are directly causing someone extreme hurt by DOING SOMETHING YOU KNOW YOU DON'T HAVE TO AND YOU CONTINUE TO DO IT WHILE THEY ARE IN PAIN ... YOU ARE PURPOSELY HURTING THEM. And there in lies the abuse. Because it's completely unnecessary and you've been told MULTIPLE times what it's doing.

You can't use the excuse of "I didn't think it was serious" because you already know it's possible that you're wrong and it is hurting and doing it anyway.

And so I ask again, what if you end up killing me all because you couldn't just call a truce and apologize. Will it be worth it?

I just want to be us...

Maybe my problem is that I'm the only one who absolutely loved every day. I guess I never asked.

But I loved waiting for you. Getting your text right about now. No, we weren't dating. And I promise I know it sounds delusional. But you felt like my wife 😭.

And maybe it's somewhere between me hyper feeling and knowing what certain things feel like and you staring at a bleeding heart and feeling nothing.

Maybe you take me and then add you to get the truth.

The truth of how it felt

The truth of what was happening.

Maybe no one needs to worry or think...

Maybe I should have grabbed you so you could feel it once. And no longer be able to pretend.

Maybe you take me and then add you.

All I know is that that's what I want

You fucked up. I'm not sure how you could make it up to me. And I did too... But cutting someone off is different. I know how you could start to fix it.

Stop running away. Come back and face me. That's a start, and you should always finish what you start.

i should be over you. it seems like you’re over me. christ it’s been almost 5 months. i guess i’ll never know if you still love me or not, because if you haven’t reach by out now, then what else could possibly be the cards for us?

i tell everyone that you’re awful and cruel and sick and twisted in the fucking head because that’s what i’m supposed to say. i have to hate you.

i have to hate you because if i don’t i’m a pathetic fool who wants a person who hurt them.

i have to hate you. i keep telling myself that. i have to hate you. i have to hate you. i have to hate you. it’s like i have to remind myself to not give you grace, sympathy, or love.

i’m supposed to think that you don’t deserve my love anymore. because that’s what a person with self-respect does. they eventually recognize that they deserve better.

i think about now, how if we for some reason got back together, would that be fair to me? probably not. i’m probably holding onto nostalgia. this feeling i’m feeling isn’t real—it’s stockholm syndrome.

except if it isn’t real then why do i feel it all the fucking time?

i get so mad at myself because i don’t deserve this. i KNOW i don’t deserve this. but still. STILL. i want you. i miss you. i love you. and fuck you for making me feel this way, STILL.

everytime i think about anyone else i say your name in the daydream instead of theirs.

but i have to hate you.

Ive sat here for months asking you to tell me if all this is a giant waste of time or not.

You know you.. You got to make literally everything more difficult.

But, thank you. Thats all ive been asking for.

Now that I know im just wasting my time, I will just get off of here and go find better things to be doing. I am only on here searching for you. Wishing I could find you and we could get on the same page

I'll never stop loving you. Nobody else will compare, I'm not trying. I want to love you like I used to, but we need to put in the work to build trust. I didn't want you gone forever. I needed you to know how badly you hurt me, and kept hurting me by doing the same thing again and again. That isn't fair, I am a human with feelings, and you should respect me.

It wasn't fair to demand I love you the way I did the first time without doing the work to get there with me. You ignored my needs. It isn't fair to demand intimacy when my gut knows you're hiding something. You knowingly crushed my feelings because you thought you could keep it secret. And your need for quick validation was more important than the drive to build a real relationship with somebody who worshipped you.

I want our nights in bed again, but I have to be able to trust the person next to me. I still want to marry you, but I need trust. You might think you crossed a line that I could never forgive. You should know me better. I have endless forgiveness and endless love for you. I've seen you grow as a person, I want to be there next to you to see more of that.

I can't reach you. So I've been working on myself. I could be happy living under a bridge. Fortunately, I'm not under a bridge, but I am happy quite often still. I did a lot work learning to be happy in hard circumstances. As much as I love you, the pressures of our relationship were wearing on me. Much of that is your fault and you know it. My heart is broken, but I am healthier without that pressure. The pressure of you demanding and me trying, but you would never be honest or own your actions. You couldn't even stop doing the same thing you kept doing to hurt me. You would sob and say "I'll never do it again. I want to marry you!" But not enough to care about my feelings or sense of worth.

I've taken up piano. I actually go out and talk to strangers and they like me a lot and I'm handling the social anxiety way better. I'm learning more to advance my career and enjoying the challenge.

No matter what, I am going to live a happy life. But it would be happier with you. Great relationships take work. We had so much love, but we didn't do the work. You didn't do the work. You didn't own up to your actions and you stopped getting your own help. I own up to my mistakes, and I want to put in the work. Do you?7

You are such a don't worry, I'll find somebody to give them the life you didn't want. You don't have to worry about me. You're all gonna be off my beneficiary area, I'm gonna be getting my own place by tomorrow. You will never be able to use me lie to me or cheat on me again. I regret for taking you back, I thought I hated my kids' dad. You beat that so goodbye fake love

If so, I need to know where they are at.. I need to get rid of them. I dont think I have a single one. But, youre just mean to me. So, I dont know..

If this is such a huge problem to you, then why are we here?

Both of us probably made mistakes back then. Scratch it and call it even. We were both just trying to do the best we could, within the rules of course.

It felt like that's the way we were headed. There were obstacles, but they'd mostly been moved out of the way and we'd finally be together.

And then, just when I sensed there would be an opening, you made your decision. I don't blame you for going in a different direction. It's just that I really hoped it would be us. You know how sometimes you meet a person that makes all your prior pain and setbacks make sense, so you don't feel bad about them anymore? You were that person for me. You made the past make sense. And now you're part of it, and I have even more emotional wreckage.

I'm just rambling now. But there's one particular day I keep going back to that was the last time we saw each other, when I feel I had an opportunity to make my feelings known. And yet, I hesitated. Why? I can't fully explain. Would it have made a difference or was your mind already made up at that point? Again, I don't know and I never will. But it's something I regret sorely.

It really feels like you were my last chance to get things right. People say that after every missed opportunity or relationship, but at this stage of the game it seems to ring truer than usual for me, on some level at least. In any case, I just wish it could have been us. I really, really wish it were us.

Just had conversation with him ..nand I've beat you apparently and all that good stuff ..unbelievable where you get off saying that..I would t send tis

Your gorgeous green eyes pierce right through me.
Your deep voice soothes my soul. Sing to me, please.
Your accent makes my heart flutter.
I adore your smile.
I’ve seen grey hairs appearing on you and they are the most beautiful silver I’ve ever seen.
Your sense of humour tickles my funny bone.
Your touch sends electricity through my skin.
The way you bite the skin on your fingers in non-stressful situations; the way you put your hands in your pockets when you’re not sure about the person or when you’re nervous …
I notice it all.

I want your body, and I want your heart. I want your soul.
I want to make this go away.

Oh, I’m royally screwed.

I know you haven’t been honest with me. I know you’re ashamed to admit to all your lies. Each lie makes me lose a bit more respect. I’m the person who has accepted every single part of you. I know the darkest parts you try your best to hide. I’ve told you, I am you, rather was…I try so hard every day to be better, to work on myself.

I’m the one you’ve been able to open up to most. The trust we built for you to get to that point should tell you everything you need to know about who I am. I stuck around breaking down your walls brick by brick through the last few years. I wouldn’t hate you or judge you, but each lie, each time you don’t give me the whole story I feel my heart pulling further away.

Call it intuition but I know you’re seeing other people, fucking other people. I’m not stupid, I’m not naive, but I’m not going to start a fight. After all, you can’t even admit to the depth of your feelings much less take the next steps. I want to talk about these things, I just want to approach it the right way.

Maybe you tell yourself you don’t want to hurt me…the truth is you don’t want to take accountability. You don’t want to be locked down and you do want to explore other options despite the words that come out of your mouth. I guess maybe you just feel a different level of emotional depth in our connection. That scares the fuck out of you…
Maybe that’s why you lie? Because you think youd lose the person that’s made you feel things you’ve never felt before.

You think I don’t know? when you said your ex was the closest you came to love but you weren’t sure, you think I don’t know why you started to question it?

The fact that I can read your mind even though you’re a person of few words…that terrifies you, doesn’t it?

I know it does, but I’m equally as terrified if not more. Im the one who was left broken and shattered last time. Trust doesn’t come twice for people in my life and yet here I am trying to trust you. I’m struggling…maybe it’s just because I am you..rather like I said was. I’m trying so hard to be better to be more open like I promised but you’re not making it easy.

Same time I have similar worries as you: Am I good enough for you? Can I show up perfect enough not to disappoint you? Am I going to lose my independence? Why do I feel like I’m suffocating after some of our closest moments?

Did I read your mind? We are the same, only difference is that I’ve worked on myself a lot over the years. I wish you could look into attachment theory. I think a lot of things would start to make more sense to you

Each time you drop your guard I feel it. It’s like we’re two people falling in deeper and deeper. Then suddenly, it’s the sudden flip of a switch. Your glance changes, your body language gets defensive. I get it…it’s scary.

You know what’s scarier? Living with the painful reality that we never tried. If we don’t try we still get hurt…

Well, I think, let's leave outward and let me move inward. Let me enjoy myself.

Let's leave. I am glad I felt the love with intensity. I understood that part of the world too.

Now, there is no point in leaving you or letting go or fighting with my mind. Ahah. I feel like a leaf, like a wave pulling back into the calm ocean.

Woah.

We tend to think more, doubt more nd analyse more. And over time, this makes us exhausted nd we start feeling anger toward the other person, who is not responsible for our thoughts, perspectives and ideas.

I had only one thing that was bothering me, and that was that I wanted to say “I love you” at that time. But I only acknowledged these words for you the next day, so yeah, I feel a little bad.

Okay. We are here. Let me just be here. I feel good now.

Thanks for reading.