How to deal with resentment of how difficult it is to get married in Islam as a man?
21M Pakistani-American. I’m getting resentful and farther from Islam because of how long it takes to get married since it’s exceedingly difficult nowadays. Like Allah swt gives us these natural desires and somehow we’re supposed to quell them for nearly 3 decades until we’re ready to get married. Like we need to be fully prepared to provide our partner and the way to find marriage makes it so a guy needs to curate himself to be absolutely perfect in terms of looks, income, status, maturity in order to get married and find a suitable partner through connections and profiles and most men don’t get to that until late 20s to 30s.
I’m a victim of that myself, I’m premed and in university, trying to get into med school and I’m anticipating gap years because the process is getting more competitive every single year with the heightened standards and I see marriage is being pushed back until I’m in 28-32 since there’s med school and then residency which doesn’t pay much. It’s honestly tiring, stressful and I feel lonely in the process because marriage just forbids all interaction with the opposite gender outside professional bounds so I can’t even meet someone naturally in college.
I’m losing a lot of faith since it’s so outdated and unrealistic especially since desire is strongest in your young adulthood and you actively want the same natural connections everyone else enjoys and cherishes. The cost of living is getting higher as well, and you need to make a least 200k+ to sufficiently provide in this economy, buy a house and maintain your standard of living. It’s ridiculous since most early-mid 20s people aren’t at that point. Does anybody have any advice over this part, I’m not in a good state of belief bc of all of it. Any advice from scholars or knowledgable individuals would help.