Around 1:30/1:45 AM on Wisconsin Ave? Sounded like lightning hit an electrical box. Big flashes of light too. Woke me up! Followed shortly thereafter by sirens so hoping they’re on it.
After growing up in these environments are:
You were never taught how to set them and so it made you vulnerable not just to more abuse from them, but from the other narcissists out there in the world.
I’m proud that I’ve learned to recognize what I will and won’t tolerate, and have gotten a lot better at stating my boundaries calmly and clearly.
This one I’ve found to be harder. Not letting it drain you. I will cut people out when I can, but I can’t cut out a toxic coworker. The advice to “not let it get to you” is not just useless but invalidating.
Any guidance on how to build up this emotional wall is much appreciated. I’ve found I get frustrated fast and can operate well feeling “frustrated” but I know it’s not good for my health overall.
(Beyond switching jobs, because I’ve done that as well, but it seems there’s a difficult person pretty much wherever you go.)
I (33/F) would really like to date someone who shares my passion for watching and playing sports. I state this on my profile on Hinge. I also want to date someone who likes to travel and likes history.
In the last month, I’ve had 5 guys try to negotiate the sports point. It’s bizarre. For context, this is how I state this:
“The one thing you should know about me is:
I’m a huge sports fan and want to be with someone who also follows sports.”
And in my match note, I say:
“I will probably be very chatty when we meet and want to discuss sports, in particular MLB and NFL. Please unmatch if you don’t follow sports.”
I also have a photo of myself at a game, and am wearing one of my team’s logos in another. I also have photos of myself at a party with friends and two from a couple of trips.
I’ve had men tell me the sports requirement is ridiculous or have tried to justify their lack of interest and it really makes me feel like I’m being disrespected right out of the gate.
I’m obviously not agreeing to meet with these guys, but I’m curious why anyone would match anyway.
Is expecting someone to share these interests that unreasonable? They’re not obscure interests. I don’t expect someone who works for ESPN, has a history PhD, or has been to 50 countries. I just want someone who can enjoy these things alongside me.
Update: I wish I were joking but this happened again in the last few hours, for a sixth time. I’m at my wit’s end.
The exchange:
Guy: Love your fun active personality! Did a 10,000 mile road trip in September, hiking and climbing everyday, but it would have been more fun with you
😁. Would love to plan something active and fun to do with you after we chat!
Me: Thanks! That's quite a long road trip lol I'm from the Midwest so I've done a fair number of those! During Covid I used to go on 50 mile bike rides too. Do you follow sports?
Guy: I was going to say you seem super sports motivated. Why is that so important to you? Did a lot of it growing up?
Me: Many reasons. My family are all big sports fans. I love playing sports. I love watching sports. I like the perseverance, the camaraderie, and strategy that comes with watching and playing them. Do you follow them?
Guy: I'm guessing this is where you unmatch me when I say I don't watch much sports. 🫡 I guess I'll go down standing.
Me: It's really important to me. Thanks for understanding! You're very cute and I wish you the best.