u/Commercial_Issue_723

My boyfriend has a 103-pound Doberman/Malinois/German Shepherd mix that is poorly trained (bad dog manners: try being 5'4 petite and having a very large dog jump on you and knock you down out of excitement, its not fun!), has anxiety, sheds heavily, barks constantly, tries to dart out the front door, and has very few boundaries. My boyfriend lives in a small apartment, doesn’t walk or brush the dog, and dog hair/dander is everywhere, literally piled up in corners of every area of his place. I try to overlook things because he treats me well, we have a good relationship, and because its not my house but its very off putting when I walk in and see dog hair all over my boyfriends clothes, which will obviously get all over me, and dog fur tumbleweeds everywhere you look (and no he doesn't vaccum/sweep his floors or lint roll his clothes if we go in public).
I have two dogs myself, but they have rules, boundaries, dog-free zones, and I keep up with cleaning because I’m allergic to dogs (they dont sleep with me but they do have their own beds and blankets etc). I dont spend the night at my boyfriend’s apartment because the amount of hair, dander, and overall cleanliness makes me uncomfortable and aggravates my allergies (my boyfriend doesn't know that is the true reasoning).
My boyfriend says he’ll be better about cleaning, grooming, creating dog free zones/boundaries, and training the dog when we eventually move in together, but he isn’t making any effort to improve those things now.
I’m worried that if we move in together, I’ll end up being responsible for cleaning up after a dog that isn’t mine because I’m bothered by the mess and he isn’t. I also think about having children someday and don’t love the idea of my baby crawling around on floors covered in dog hair and dander.
Am I being unreasonable for questioning whether moving in together is a good idea when our standards for pet ownership, cleanliness, and household expectations seem so different? How do I have a conversation with him about it to where he will be better and managing his dog?

TLDR: My boyfriend has a 103-pound poorly mannered, high-energy working dog that sheds heavily and lives with very few boundaries. I’m allergic, keep a much cleaner home with my own dogs, and dont spend the night at his apartment because of the conditions. He says he’ll improve the cleaning and training if we move in together, but I haven’t seen any effort so far. I’m worried about future cohabitation, potential children, and becoming responsible for cleaning up after a dog that isn’t mine. Am I overthinking this?

My boyfriend has a 103-pound Doberman/Malinois/German Shepherd mix that is poorly trained (bad dog manners: try being 5'4 petite and having a very large dog jump on you and knock you down out of excitement, its not fun!), has anxiety, sheds heavily, barks constantly, tries to dart out the front door, and has very few boundaries. My boyfriend lives in a small apartment, doesn’t walk or brush the dog, and dog hair/dander is everywhere, literally piled up in corners of every area of his place. I try to overlook things because he treats me well, we have a good relationship, and because its not my house but its very off putting when I walk in and see dog hair all over my boyfriends clothes, which will obviously get all over me, and dog fur tumbleweeds everywhere you look (and no he doesn't vaccum/sweep his floors or lint roll his clothes if we go in public).
I have two dogs myself, but they have rules, boundaries, dog-free zones, and I keep up with cleaning because I’m allergic to dogs (they dont sleep with me but they do have their own beds and blankets etc). I dont spend the night at my boyfriend’s apartment because the amount of hair, dander, and overall cleanliness makes me uncomfortable and aggravates my allergies (my boyfriend doesn't know that is the true reasoning).
My boyfriend says he’ll be better about cleaning, grooming, creating dog free zones/boundaries, and training the dog when we eventually move in together, but he isn’t making any effort to improve those things now.
I’m worried that if we move in together, I’ll end up being responsible for cleaning up after a dog that isn’t mine because I’m bothered by the mess and he isn’t. I also think about having children someday and don’t love the idea of my baby crawling around on floors covered in dog hair and dander.
Am I being unreasonable for questioning whether moving in together is a good idea when our standards for pet ownership, cleanliness, and household expectations seem so different? How do I have a conversation with him about it to where he will be better and managing his dog?

TLDR: My boyfriend has a 103-pound poorly mannered, high-energy working dog that sheds heavily and lives with very few boundaries. I’m allergic, keep a much cleaner home with my own dogs, and dont spend the night at his apartment because of the conditions. He says he’ll improve the cleaning and training if we move in together, but I haven’t seen any effort so far. I’m worried about future cohabitation, potential children, and becoming responsible for cleaning up after a dog that isn’t mine. Am I overthinking this?

My boyfriend has a 103-pound Doberman/Malinois/German Shepherd mix that is poorly trained (bad dog manners: try being 5'4 petite and having a very large dog jump on you and knock you down out of excitement, its not fun!), has anxiety, sheds heavily, barks constantly, tries to dart out the front door, and has very few boundaries. My boyfriend lives in a small apartment, doesn’t walk or brush the dog, and dog hair/dander is everywhere, literally piled up in corners of every area of his place. I try to overlook things because he treats me well, we have a good relationship, and because its not my house but its very off putting when I walk in and see dog hair all over my boyfriends clothes, which will obviously get all over me, and dog fur tumbleweeds everywhere you look (and no he doesn't vaccum/sweep his floors or lint roll his clothes if we go in public).
I have two dogs myself, but they have rules, boundaries, dog-free zones, and I keep up with cleaning because I’m allergic to dogs (they dont sleep with me but they do have their own beds and blankets etc). I dont spend the night at my boyfriend’s apartment because the amount of hair, dander, and overall cleanliness makes me uncomfortable and aggravates my allergies (my boyfriend doesn't know that is the true reasoning).
My boyfriend says he’ll be better about cleaning, grooming, creating dog free zones/boundaries, and training the dog when we eventually move in together, but he isn’t making any effort to improve those things now.
I’m worried that if we move in together, I’ll end up being responsible for cleaning up after a dog that isn’t mine because I’m bothered by the mess and he isn’t. I also think about having children someday and don’t love the idea of my baby crawling around on floors covered in dog hair and dander.
Am I being unreasonable for questioning whether moving in together is a good idea when our standards for pet ownership, cleanliness, and household expectations seem so different? How do I have a conversation with him about it to where he will be better and managing his dog?

TLDR: My boyfriend has a 103-pound poorly mannered, high-energy working dog that sheds heavily and lives with very few boundaries. I’m allergic, keep a much cleaner home with my own dogs, and dont spend the night at his apartment because of the conditions. He says he’ll improve the cleaning and training if we move in together, but I haven’t seen any effort so far. I’m worried about future cohabitation, potential children, and becoming responsible for cleaning up after a dog that isn’t mine. Am I overthinking this?

My boyfriend has a 103-pound Doberman/Malinois/German Shepherd mix that is poorly trained (bad dog manners: try being 5'4 petite and having a very large dog jump on you and knock you down out of excitement, its not fun!), has anxiety, sheds heavily, barks constantly, tries to dart out the front door, and has very few boundaries. My boyfriend lives in a small apartment, doesn’t walk or brush the dog, and dog hair/dander is everywhere, literally piled up in corners of every area of his place. I try to overlook things because he treats me well, we have a good relationship, and because its not my house but its very off putting when I walk in and see dog hair all over my boyfriends clothes, which will obviously get all over me, and dog fur tumbleweeds everywhere you look (and no he doesn't vaccum/sweep his floors or lint roll his clothes if we go in public).
I have two dogs myself, but they have rules, boundaries, dog-free zones, and I keep up with cleaning because I’m allergic to dogs (they dont sleep with me but they do have their own beds and blankets etc). I dont spend the night at my boyfriend’s apartment because the amount of hair, dander, and overall cleanliness makes me uncomfortable and aggravates my allergies (my boyfriend doesn't know that is the true reasoning).
My boyfriend says he’ll be better about cleaning, grooming, creating dog free zones/boundaries, and training the dog when we eventually move in together, but he isn’t making any effort to improve those things now.
I’m worried that if we move in together, I’ll end up being responsible for cleaning up after a dog that isn’t mine because I’m bothered by the mess and he isn’t. I also think about having children someday and don’t love the idea of my baby crawling around on floors covered in dog hair and dander.
Am I being unreasonable for questioning whether moving in together is a good idea when our standards for pet ownership, cleanliness, and household expectations seem so different? How do I have a conversation with him about it to where he will be better and managing his dog?

My boyfriend has a 103-pound Doberman/Malinois/German Shepherd mix that is poorly trained (bad dog manners: try being 5'4 petite and having a very large dog jump on you and knock you down out of excitement, its not fun!), has anxiety, sheds heavily, barks constantly, tries to dart out the front door, and has very few boundaries. My boyfriend lives in a small apartment, doesn’t walk or brush the dog, and dog hair/dander is everywhere, literally piled up in corners of every area of his place. I try to overlook things because he treats me well, we have a good relationship, and because its not my house but its very off putting when I walk in and see dog hair all over my boyfriends clothes, which will obviously get all over me, and dog fur tumbleweeds everywhere you look (and no he doesn't vaccum/sweep his floors or lint roll his clothes if we go in public).
I have two dogs myself, but they have rules, boundaries, dog-free zones, and I keep up with cleaning because I’m allergic to dogs (they dont sleep with me but they do have their own beds and blankets etc). I dont spend the night at my boyfriend’s apartment because the amount of hair, dander, and overall cleanliness makes me uncomfortable and aggravates my allergies (my boyfriend doesn't know that is the true reasoning).
My boyfriend says he’ll be better about cleaning, grooming, creating dog free zones/boundaries, and training the dog when we eventually move in together, but he isn’t making any effort to improve those things now.
I’m worried that if we move in together, I’ll end up being responsible for cleaning up after a dog that isn’t mine because I’m bothered by the mess and he isn’t. I also think about having children someday and don’t love the idea of my baby crawling around on floors covered in dog hair and dander.
Am I being unreasonable for questioning whether moving in together is a good idea when our standards for pet ownership, cleanliness, and household expectations seem so different? How do I have a conversation with him about it to where he will be better and managing his dog?