u/Curious-Toe-93

the abused becomes the abuser

how have you dealt with a parent who has been abused by another parent which leads to them becoming an abuser to their own children? i'm 22F, my parents have always had a rocky (arranged) marriage, but as we're an Indian household, divorce doesn't seem to be an option for them. my mother claims that she wasn't so rude and agitated before marriage as she is today, and i know she has been through a tumultuous marriage where there is no love, and a lot of abuse, which is why it was initially easier for me to side her and be as distant with my father as possible. but i have also noticed that this has led to her becoming (then physically, now verbally) abusive towards me, especially me as there is still some empathy and "willingness to do better" towards my brother. i dont live with them anymore, but it sucks not being able to talk to your own mother without her either trauma dumping or treating our calls like a daily agenda, it's always "what's next?", the refusal leading to constant screaming and insulting and ultimatums, saying that i am bound to listen to her problems because "family matters" and that they're returning the favour (by all means i rarely share my issues that too because they've always wondered why i kept things to myself after the event passed), that i'm selfish for not doing so, and i'm only here for the money (which again, is also false - i have helped them save as much as i could, i stopped going home three years ago, never went on trips or had disposable money unless it was my very own, and the only time my mother has visited me to the states was during my graduation week that too after immense begging to just show up ffs). i'm at crossroads if i should completely cut her off, as she is still comparatively much nicer to my 15yo brother. my father and i are a bit distant as it is, though he is making an effort by calling everyday, has acknowledged the distance and wants to make ammends by checking in on me every single day, sometimes twice a day about my wellbeing.

reddit.com
u/Curious-Toe-93 — 16 hours ago

got the job after a year and a half of search

Welp did not know this day would come but here it is, it's a bad bad market for international students but we made it FINALLY :') applied since sept 2024, got my grad date delayed thrice and applied for 4 more months post grad, and got a job today with an option to work remotely. It all paid off !!

reddit.com
u/Curious-Toe-93 — 10 days ago
▲ 6 r/emotionalintelligence+1 crossposts

It's been 5 months since no contact, I haven't cried over my situationship in good 3 months but suddenly im filled with so much rage. I found out that he viewed one of my stories last month and since then I've been taken aback. I've been left with the same sadness, confusion and a worry that because of this and my previous heartbreaks, I just may never give another guy a chance. I will never feel prepared. There's this unsettling feeling that has crept in me after doing so good these past 3 months, focusing on myself and working my ass off (maybe it's also bc im on my period rn lmao) but what do i even do with this rage? Part of me really wants to break that nc and lash out, part of me is really withholding because i made a promise to never break it and that'll be one of the biggest betrayals to myself ever. I just can't stop finding more and more things (not something i did to get something out of, but coincidences that just reveal more information) about this dude and trust me the more i do, the more it makes sense and the less i get to bring all that up because of his avoidant behaviour. And also how are you, as a classic avoidant, gonna preach about niceness and positivity and being that man full of love when you wanted to be a complete dismissive asshole to me in the pretence of being that good guy.... lmfao. What do i do to cope with this ?

reddit.com
u/Curious-Toe-93 — 19 days ago