u/DarthKaboose

Trying to work out if it’s worth doing a limited number of free strategies when pitching clients. Have just begun freelancing. I’ve got experience from university and two past communications jobs but no usable case studies, testimonials, or social proof.

I commonly see two trains of thought — one that pro bono work in exchange for testimonials/ case studies is good for starting out. The other is that free work is always a no-no due to limited perceived value, lack of client investment causing problems with timeliness and implementation, and that it can put clients off if they get pitched for free feeling like they’re being pitied.

Where do you sit on this? What would you recommend?

8 mo is a biter. He defies all textbook explanations. It’s not when he’s bored or distracted. He’ll bite mid-feed with no warning. He’ll bite latching on. He’s drawn blood twice now. The pain is unmatched.

However, I have a weird reaction to weaning. (My older two were exclusively formula fed and I’d eye-roll at people saying similar stuff to this so I do apologise, lol!). I cry hysterically giving him a bottle. And I mean hysterically. It feels like the grief from when a family member died. I hate it and can’t work out why it happens as nobody else seems to know what I’m talking about. I’m putting it down to hormones. It’s not guilt related because I know rationally there’s nothing to feel guilty about, it’s a very irrational thing.

Any experiences or tips appreciated, thank you.

Curious to know. Share your stories here!

Little man is now 8 months and has cut two teeth. He has bit me twice now while nursing. Neither times were particularly distracted, this one was mid-feed when he was latched and guzzling happily then chomped so badly out of nowhere it drew blood. I screamed in pain, giving my other son with autism such a fright he was inconsolable for nearly an hour. My scream the first time it happened didn’t affect baby at all, this time it made him cry, too.

It’s still ongoing. I don’t know what to do. My goal was to feed to two years. I don’t want that pain again, it’s still so very sore now. Deep bite.

However, there’s so much I’ll miss about nursing. I don’t feel emotionally ready to stop but honestly, I don’t think I ever will. What am I meant to do to console him the 4 odd times he wakes at night if I can’t pop a boob out? How do I calm him when he’s fallen and hurt his head?

Breastfeeding has given us such a beautiful bond. I love those moments with him more than anything and it’s where I’ll go when I die and go to heaven. I’ll always be a wreck when it has to stop.

I’m also very prone to mastitis, have had it half a dozen times in as many months, and am worried about pumping because it aggravated it the last time I tried and we haven’t pumped since. I also hate anyone giving him a bottle, myself included. My hormones and instincts are all really weird and intense around exclusively nursing but good lord, I don’t want to feel this pain again!

Any help or advice appreciated. Used shields early days but they affected baby’s latch and contributed to the mastitis.

I am so staunchly anti sleep training. It breaks my heart to even think of. I’ve read the James McKenna book, baby and I have co-slept and breastfed from day one, we contact nap. Any attempts to lay him down on a separate surface etc result in him waking and crying so this is how we go.

However, he’s now 8 months and I am struggling so bad. The past three nights he’s been up every half hour. Every. Half. Hour. I’m dreading tonight. I’m dreading the night after that, and the one after that. I look like an idiot who doesn’t know what she’s talking about when I’m so pro BN infant sleep because look at the absolutely wrecked state of me about to collapse from exhaustion with eye bags the size of Texas. Meanwhile the parents who got consultants in and did variations of sleep training are glowing with all their hours of sleep and their babies don’t seem any worse for wear.

I’m struggling so bad with this sleep deprivation. Can anyone help? Am I missing a trick that doesn’t involve sleep training?

I feel like I’m letting us all down in a weird way by being such a mess example of someone who doesn’t sleep train. :(

After not having slept properly in the 8 months since our third baby was born, and my husband saying that on Mother’s Day he would take the baby so I can have a good lie in, he decided to go out with his friends late last night and null that entirely. He’s now sleeping off his hangover while I’m up first with the baby like always.

We’ve been slammed with bills the past couple of weeks for various things so there’s no money for a gift for me which is fine. But of course my slightly narcissistic mother made a big song and dance about *reminding* my brother and I multiple times what’s coming up this weekend, wink nudge. He lives in another country and is useless so of course it’s on me to arrange. I proposed going halves on a voucher for a massage/ facial place, he agreed, I’ve still not seen that money and it’s now the morning of. I’ve also had to give up half my day to seeing her for coffee and cake, hoping that meant maybe I’d at least be able to get out of the house for an hour or two, to which she’s replied she couldn’t possibly afford that and she’ll come to mine. The irony is ridiculous.

On top of that we have my mother-in-law who I thought I’d cracked the code by sending her or dropping off flowers for Mother’s Day each year when my husband and I got together. More than slightly narcissistic, she has now turned it into a flowers competition and sends me a bigger, fancier, $300-odd set on Mother’s Day too to ‘appreciate me’ when if you knew her, you’d know it’s to make it a competition. Now my measly $40 supermarket bouquets don’t cut the mustard. I thought I could do something more heartfelt and bake her favourite fruit into a loaf for her with a handwritten note, but she’s been telling me I feed my kids rubbish lately and we all need to be gluten dairy and sugar free, so I’d now have to make the loaf gluten dairy and sugar free or she’ll turn up her nose at it. Not really an issue but it’s a less stable recipe. And so the rare moments I’ll get today not feeding a baby or seeing my own mother, I’ll be spending baking a loaf that may or may not turn out okay and she may or may not enjoy even if it does.

My 10 year old son confessed to me last night he and my husband haven’t discussed Mother’s Day at all and he was panicking about what to do. He said he had an idea but wasn’t sure if I’d like it. I reassured him I’ll love anything he gets me because it comes from him. At this point if someone handed me a rock I’d probably weep with joy and relief.

I’m so tired and burnt out and this is meant to be a day of honouring what we do and go through as mothers. Instead it’s more stress than an average Sunday. Is there any way we can opt out. lol

First feed of the morning, me half-asleep, baby latching as we’ve done so many times before with his two new teeth that I delusionally thought would never “chomp”…

Oh my goodness, I truly thought my nipple had been bitten clean off.

My answering yelp woke the whole household.

But, never one to waste an opportunity, I fell straight back into the training I’d so meticulously drilled into myself over the past eight months. Yes, La Leche League book, it was your time to shine. I gave the stern “no!” And ended the feed, thinking we would lock eyes and have an unspoken communication and this would be a real learning moment and would never be repeated again.

Baby barely heard me. Decided he wasn’t so fussed anyway, despite all his dramatics and wailing and trying to get latched in the first place, and happily crawled away making excited noises to start the day.

Meanwhile my 2-year-goal is flashing before my eyes and suddenly the mastitis-causing breast pump doesn’t seem like such a bad idea and I have no idea how I’ll get through the head-bumps or the overtired moments or the midnight comfort wakes without nursing. Cue the tears. From me, to be clear, not baby, who is still oblivious.

Minimal physical damage. Much emotional.

How did y’all handle this?!

Am contracting to a marketing agency but it feels structured more like employment. Have been paid $25 per hour for a year. I was asked to take on more duties and step into an account management role. I tried to negotiate a higher rate but was told because the work is consistent it’s a lower rate and justified by my lack of experience before this. We negotiated to $27/h for this ongoing project and I’m now sub-contracting. (Edit to add the $25/h was also contracting, I’m now sub-contracting as the agency hold the contract with a client and are contracting it out to me). I still come into the office each day. I don’t do any other work.

It genuinely is good experience and opportunity but I’m struggling with the pay factor. I’m not close enough with anyone else in-office to ask their pay rate.

I also don’t want to be conceited. I spoke with my therapist about this and when I mentioned $40-$50 an hour being more fair for this kind of work she was shocked and didn’t seem to agree then moved on.

Any thoughts appreciated.

Advised to post here by the mods of the legal advice subreddit.