u/DecentNarwhal5501

Earlier in the week, I was intending leave work a little early to go to see an old friend of mine who was visiting from out of town.

I had mentioned this to my manager at the end of last week, but I guess he had forgotten or changed his mind about this without letting me know!

The morning of, I had reminded my manager that I would be leaving early. He told me that it wasn’t going to be possible anymore because we were expecting a busier than normal ending to the day.

I was very disappointed by this and didn’t know exactly how to argue my case. I’m not a very argumentative person, and conflict is very hard for me to navigate, so I decided I would tell him towards the end of the day that I wasn’t feeling well or something I ate at lunch had messed up my stomach.

So here we go, 3pm rolls around and I walked up to my manager with my hands over my stomach, and told him: hey, my stomach is a bit upset. Would it be okay if I left early?

His reply: unless you are physically sick, I think you can manage a few more hours.

It was clear that I had not thrown up, so I did the best with what I had. I told him: I have been physically sick and need to go home.

He kept pushing: really, you look just fine.

I said: if you must know, I have actually just had an incident in my trousers.

He started laughing and said: really, you’ve shit yourself.

In this moment, I just figured fuck it. This guys an asshole and I want to get the fuck out of here.

So, I looked the man right in the eye and pushed one out.

He looked mortified as the room began to fill with that sour smell. But in the end, I won. I was able to rush home, take a quick shower, and then have a lovely catchup with my old friend.

I have not been back to work since, and have filed a complaint to HR against my manager for ignoring me telling him I was sick. Hopefully this blows over soon.

Sounds strange, but it is very exciting for me. I have been exceptionally stressed out at work the last year and a half or so. About 8 months ago, I just wanted some kind of relief from the seemingly endless agony of the corporate lifestyle.

This all happed to be a coincidence in the way it started. I had just thrown out all my old Tupperware and needed to pickup some new ones. So I headed down to my local DollarTree and picked a few up.

When I got home and unpackaged them, I realized they were all cracked. This was the last straw for me. Fuck this, fuck dollar tree, fuck everything.

I wasn’t going to let it go this time, so I decided to heck with it. I’m gonna fart alll over these bad boys and go back to return it.

My heat was pounding on my way there, would they know, would they smell it, would they even accept the return as the package is ripped open? Completely invigorated me, I had never felt so much life before!

Long storey short, they accepted my return and any time I’m in a funk (which is a lot lately) I go back to the dollartree or local grocery store and fart in there Tupperware.