u/Desperate_Box_7442

i'm a bit new to this, so excuse me if i'm asking something well known to this community.

how do you welcome communication when it feels like your conscious is blocking it?

i had an experience with a UFO about 12 years ago, with a missing chunk of time. i told people close to me, but for the most part, i just moved on and went on with my life.

now, something about the experience is burning in my head 12 years later, out of nowhere, and i feel like there's a reason. i cant let it go and i cant stop thinking about it. why 12 years later?

i have dreams where it feels like i'm close to something, but then i think i pull myself back. i have a recurring dream where i'm flying to "the end of the world", but then i turn around, and check into a "bus station" place, and ask to go home. another recurring dream i have is being stuck in a black abyss, but i always start freaking out and beg to go back. i always feel like i'm being watched in the black abyss. (who am i asking and who is watching?)

it's not conscious control, and i only remember these things after i wake up. i haven't been able to lucid dream since a very young age.

i strongly feel like someone somewhere is trying to tell me or show me something. i dont know why i feel this way, but i do, and i cant shake the feeling. i think i'm consciously welcoming it, but at the same time, i feel there's some kind of "block".

wondering how people overcome this hurdle.

Is it just me or are people kinda... entitled? And ungrateful? Stupid? I know I would feel grateful if someone was caring for my parent, child, or loved one and relieving me of the responsibility. (Coming from a special needs mom).

In other times or countries, the responsibility falls on the family to take care of their sick/disabled ones. I wonder if that ever occurs to some people...? Like if they dont like how we are, they could take them home and do it themselves? Or they could have to be doing it themselves and wow its kinda cool they dont have to?

We empathize with them, they dont seem to empathize with us. That shit gets old. Unpopular opinion- I know youre feeling guilt/anxiety/sadness/anger, but stop projecting that onto me and get your shit together... and maybe try being grateful and appreciative that you have the help many others dont have.

i really want to hear people's experiences with seeing a UFO... and i'm not talking about strange lights in the distance or orbs or anything like that... but the time you were staring at a nuts and bolts UFO, no doubt in your mind that's what it was.

i had my own experience about 12 years ago, and so i know there has to be many other people out there like me... who saw a UFO, didnt get "proof", never reported it or made it a spectacle of it, or bothered with trying to get people to "believe" what they saw, maybe told a few people, and just moved on with life with that experience/knowledge.

i think there's probably a lot more people out there than we bother to listen to, and they probably stay quiet just out of fear of not being believed or lack of proof... if its allowed, i would love to hear your stories.

reddit used to be a place of investigative research and full of users with a desire for more nuanced, independent discussion or information.

now, it's become a sanitized, performative echo chamber where "consensus" seems to be the only currency that matters.

it’s become a landscape where the illusion of open discussion is maintained, but the substance is heavily policed, to the point of censorship.

the old reddit thrived on intellectual friction. it was messy. it was offensive at times. but you could actually go into a thread and find a doctor, an engineer, and a regular joe debating a point, citing sources, and everyone actually kinda learned something new in the process.

now, any dissent, any nuanced questioning of "official" narratives, or any attempt to introduce complex data that doesn't fit the "approved" headline is removed. subreddits are run more like a toxic HR department at this point.

we have moved into an era where labels like "misinformation" have been weaponized against people sharing any OTHER information.

when a platform is so terrified of advertiser boycotts or administrative crackdowns that it effectively bans any discourse that hasn't been preapproved by mainstream news cycles, it loses its soul. it stops being a place to FIND information and becomes a place to be FED information.

reddit used to be a place of investigative research and full of users with a desire for more nuanced, independent discussion or information.

now, it's become a sanitized, performative echo chamber where "consensus" seems to be the only currency that matters. it’s currently nothing more than a landscape where the illusion of open discussion is maintained, but the substance is overly policed, to the point of censorship.

the old reddit thrived on intellectual friction. it was messy. it was offensive at times. but you could actually go into a thread and find a doctor, an engineer, and a regular joe debating a point, citing sources, and everyone actually kinda learned something new in the process.

now, any dissent, any nuanced questioning of "official" narratives, or any attempt to introduce complex data that doesn't fit the "approved" headline is removed. we have moved into an era where labels like "misinformation" have been weaponized against people sharing any OTHER information. and subreddits are run more like a toxic HR department at this point.

when a platform is so terrified of advertiser boycotts or administrative crackdowns that it effectively bans any discourse that hasn't been preapproved by mainstream news cycles, it loses its soul. it stops being a place to FIND information and becomes a place to be FED information.

I saw a UFO (still not into calling them UAPs yet) about 12 years ago. Super up close and personal. Twice in the same night. It followed me and interacted with me. Definite flying saucer. Blew my 18-year-old mind. Completely changed my life. Never been the same. Nobody cares, right??

So I decided to get real weird about it about 2 years ago, after my first and only sleep paralysis experience. It wasn't an immediate suspicion, but over time I started to feel like the two experiences were connected somehow, despite completely understanding the science behind sleep paralysis.

A week ago, I went to bed trying to set the intentions of "making contact with them" in my dreams... Really trying to make some magic shit happen in my head, despite being a completely not magical or gifted individual whatsoever...

And then I had a dream I was stuck in a black abyss. (I'm actually not even sure it was a dream, but I'll just refer to it as that.)

Best way to explain it...

I was standing in absolute blackness. I was screaming and crying, "I'm sorry, take me back, please". I was consciously aware. It didn't even feel like a dream at that point. I remember feeling really scared. And sad. And not alone...

I keep thinking about it. It felt like I was stuck in a television of infinite nothingness, somehow being watched. I felt like I wasn't begging someone to "take me back", but someones...? Like I was being watched by an audience that somehow had the power to do that.

In the blackness, I remember thinking I was stuck there. Like maybe I was... dead? But now, I wonder....

What the fuck was that? Who was I talking to? Why was I being watched? Why don't they let me see them? Why do they only allow me to retain small pieces of the event? Who even are "they"?

I'm 99% sure everyone in my life hates me when I talk about this stuff and I can tell they're sick of my shit. So I'm looking forward to everyone here feeling the same.