u/DistinctIndividual63

We had a phone conversation and I specifically referenced the email sent when we were engaged that stated their opinion on how successful our marriage will be based on me not being Catholic. This is where my issues with ILs all began, I could never not think of that when around them. It ate at me everytime they said “we love you guys!” They wouldn’t say anything about it. I had to go back upstairs to settle baby back to sleep.

While I was gone, DH did finally reference it again and made me seem like a toddler throwing a fit. He told them that it was his bad for showing me. His dad said “I didn’t intend for her to see that” and DH said “yeah that’s on me”. DH chalked it up to me misinterpreting and just not knowing them well enough and having some hard feelings. They said “it would kill us if we lost you guys too, we’ve already lost so much”. Playing the victim. There was no accountability taken. I know this because we recorded to conversation as that is my husbands solution to not believing me when I tell him things they’ve said.

So the next night, I called by myself. It went ok. I was certainly more stern. I think they understand I’m not just playing along with everything. But I absolutely do not trust my husband anymore. For 5 years he’s been telling me he’s addressed things with them and that I should trust him. I don’t know how to get past that. He did not have my back at all and catered to their feelings only. It is a miserable time in this house.

I'm in my first year and need help pricing an S Corp return. Unfortunately, they also needed to have reviewed financial statements (which I could not provide), but I worked for several years at the firm that they engaged to complete them. I know the partners well. I prepared the financials in their format, provided the other firm my workpapers, adjustments, etc. They made no adjustments to my work (total AJE's roughly 25). I am struggling to bill as I completed all the work but the other firm billed significantly more than last year for significantly less work. It is a LCOL area. They were billed very low by the other firm for both tax and financial statement review last year at only $2,070. Gross revenue over $5 million if that matters. I live in a very small town and people talk about their accountant, lawyer, everything. Most new clients come by word of mouth.

Can you guys just check me. Am I hating on these people for no reason? My husband is generally supportive but thinks I overreact and I just absolutely hate even interacting with them.

My husband and I have a call scheduled with my in laws to discuss things. We have been married for over 3 years and have a 1 year old. From the beginning there have been issues, I’ve never felt comfortable or close with them. I get passive aggressive comments occasionally or comments that seem to have undertones of messages they want to get across but won’t actually address.

For context, they live 1.5 hours away. My husband is just shy of 40. He was married before and had to have an annulment to be married in the Catholic Church again. I am not Catholic and was pretty much indifferent until I saw the process and went to the church more. I am very much against becoming Catholic or getting my daughter baptized in the Catholic Church at this point. I am confirmed Lutheran.

Additional context: my daughter cannot tolerate any medicine. When she sick we have to rely solely on Tylenol suppositories which often make her have a bowel movement. When that happens we just hope she absorbed enough. She never has mild fevers. Always 103-104. She projectile vomits anytime an oral liquid Motrin or chewable tablet enters her mouth. Even mixed with various foods. My husband works in a hospital setting and does FULL PPE in every single patient interaction her has. Also, I still breastfeed and that is her comfort. How she goes to sleep each night and for naps. I stay home with her.

Here’s a list of things that have just irked the hell out of me for five years and I’m about to confront them about it so I can just get it off my chest.

-Told me “I don’t think the annulment will be ready by June” when I said we would like a June wedding

-Called the Diocese bc they wanted us to have a Catholic wedding and begged them to process the annulment

-Got very upset when told we would just get it blessed later by the church. His dad stormed out and slammed the door after saying “how can it be a real marriage if it’s not in the church!”

-Wrote a very long email about how I need to be Catholic in order for the marriage to work. Listed a bunch of statistics he gathered from various Catholic sources about divorce rates between couples that weren’t both Catholic.

-Passive aggressive comments about traditions keeping the family tight that made it feel like he was sending me a message that we weren’t participating enough. They have four kids. One won’t speak to them. One lives several states away.

-We asked them to not kiss our brand new baby literally as they were walking down the hall to meet her in the hospital, kissed right then, and kissed several times after. When confronted finally, said she hadn’t been kissing her.

-Asked not to distribute photos, distributed photos and uploads them to her mom’s electronic picture frame.

-Said “I think (husband) has more important things to worry about” when I told her we were doing no dyes with our daughter.

-Brought down husband’s baptism stuff? Why?

-Keeps taking our daughter out of my arms when I’m holding her. Doing grabby hands.

-Regardless of how many times we tell them when our daughter is sick it’s a bad deal, continue to downplay it saying “kids get sick, kids get sick” and “well her dad works in a hospital” when explaining the severity, his dad said “so what, are we just never going to see her?”

-Went to ask my husband after I told her no on babysitting our daughter for my birthday when she was two months old. Then again for my husbands birthday when she was six months old. As if she would get a different response from him. Pushes for us to go out and let her watch our daughter.

-Told me my daughter had my fingers (lol) and then proceeded to say how much she looked just like my husband.

-Bring up former friend in a way that makes it feel like I made my grown husband cut them off? As if this former friend didn’t treat me like garbage when we started dating? Told me my husband owes his career to this friend. Also pushed me to invite this woman to my bridal shower even though she really talked down to me and I let my MIL know that. Several times.

-Keeps bringing up my daughter sleeping over.

Give me your thoughts please! I have never felt like this about a significant others parents but I am going crazy stewing over stuff with them.

Can you guys just check me. Am I hating on these people for no reason? My husband is generally supportive but thinks I overreact and I just absolutely hate even interacting with them.

My husband and I have a call scheduled with my in laws to discuss things. We have been married for over 3 years and have a 1 year old. From the beginning there have been issues, I’ve never felt comfortable or close with them. I get passive aggressive comments occasionally or comments that seem to have undertones of messages they want to get across but won’t actually address.

For context, they live 1.5 hours away. My husband is just shy of 40. He was married before and had to have an annulment to be married in the Catholic Church again. I am not Catholic and was pretty much indifferent until I saw the process and went to the church more. I am very much against becoming Catholic or getting my daughter baptized in the Catholic Church at this point. I am confirmed Lutheran.

Additional context: my daughter cannot tolerate any medicine. When she sick we have to rely solely on Tylenol suppositories which often make her have a bowel movement. When that happens we just hope she absorbed enough. She never has mild fevers. Always 103-104. She projectile vomits anytime an oral liquid Motrin or chewable tablet enters her mouth. Even mixed with various foods. My husband works in a hospital setting and does FULL PPE in every single patient interaction her has. Also, I still breastfeed and that is her comfort. How she goes to sleep each night and for naps. I stay home with her.

Here’s a list of things that have just irked the hell out of me for five years and I’m about to confront them about it so I can just get it off my chest.

-Told me “I don’t think the annulment will be ready by June” when I said we would like a June wedding

-Called the Diocese bc they wanted us to have a Catholic wedding and begged them to process the annulment

-Got very upset when told we would just get it blessed later by the church. His dad stormed out and slammed the door after saying “how can it be a real marriage if it’s not in the church!”

-Wrote a very long email about how I need to be Catholic in order for the marriage to work. Listed a bunch of statistics he gathered from various Catholic sources about divorce rates between couples that weren’t both Catholic.

-Passive aggressive comments about traditions keeping the family tight that made it feel like he was sending me a message that we weren’t participating enough. They have four kids. One won’t speak to them. One lives several states away.

-We asked them to not kiss our brand new baby literally as they were walking down the hall to meet her in the hospital, kissed right then, and kissed several times after. When confronted finally, said she hadn’t been kissing her.

-Asked not to distribute photos, distributed photos and uploads them to her mom’s electronic picture frame.

-Said “I think (husband) has more important things to worry about” when I told her we were doing no dyes with our daughter.

-Brought down husband’s baptism stuff? Why?

-Keeps taking our daughter out of my arms when I’m holding her. Doing grabby hands.

-Regardless of how many times we tell them when our daughter is sick it’s a bad deal, continue to downplay it saying “kids get sick, kids get sick” and “well her dad works in a hospital” when explaining the severity, his dad said “so what, are we just never going to see her?”

-Went to ask my husband after I told her no on babysitting our daughter for my birthday when she was two months old. Then again for my husbands birthday when she was six months old. As if she would get a different response from him. Pushes for us to go out and let her watch our daughter.

-Told me my daughter had my fingers (lol) and then proceeded to say how much she looked just like my husband.

-Bring up former friend in a way that makes it feel like I made my grown husband cut them off? As if this former friend didn’t treat me like garbage when we started dating? Told me my husband owes his career to this friend. Also pushed me to invite this woman to my bridal shower even though she really talked down to me and I let my MIL know that. Several times.

-Keeps bringing up my daughter sleeping over.

Give me your thoughts please! I have never felt like this about a significant others parents but I am going crazy stewing over stuff with them.