u/Economy-Welcome5933

I tired to read and add as many comments as I could find on my last one, here’s the new one:

• Steven Spielberg-You are a person who exists in your own basic vanilla world. (Complimentary)
• Stanley Kubrick-You sneer at modern fans who haven’t seen this man’s entire set.
• Christopher Nolan- Awww, does the little baby wanna watch real movies? Does the baby have the highest rated films online? Does the baby have a point?
• Damien Chazelle-This one honestly depends, you're either a starry eyed theater kid, or a depressed psycho.
• Baz Lurhmann-Happy and Gay.
• Gus Van Sant-Sad and Gay.
• Tim Burton-You never grew out of your middle school emo phase and honestly, kudos to you for keeping with your guy,  so many of us have abandoned him.
• Denis Villeneuve-No hate, but I’m confident you haven’t watched anything made before 2005.
• Guillermo Del Toro-You were probably once a Tim Burton stan but have since moved on.
• Coen Brothers-You have amazing taste, keep it up.
• David Fincher-You probably use the term “film bro” unironically.
• Martin Scorsese-You either love or hate the “absolute cinema” meme. No inbetween.
• Sam Raimi-You like to have fun here, nice to have you. (usually) 
• Wes Anderson-You have based your entire life on this aesthetic.
• Spike Lee-Yeah yeah, “Fight the power” and all, do you have to keep getting into arguments with strangers?
• Guy Ritchie-You feel smarter hearing the British accents.
• Quentin Tarantino-For the love, stop doing the same dance move over and over again every time you go to the club, we get it, you like Pulp Fiction.
• Edgar Wright-You need to own up to your ADHD problem.
• John Hughes-You used to be fun, but are now just old and sad.
• David Lynch-“It’s kinda Lynchian” -you every freaking time you see anything strange
• Jim Jarmusch-Your such a hipster that you ended up finding real quality and I’m very happy for you.
• Greta Gerwig-Your the type of girl who seems timid but will absolutely destroy anyone who talks crap about your friends.
• Paul Thomas Anderson-I can’t make fun of you guys, you are winning rn.
• Matthew Vaughn-You don’t want to say Guy Ritchie for the answer so you picked the next best thing.
• Mel Brooks-You say you prefer classic comedy but I’ve seen you people bust a gut at a random instagram reel with no humor except racism so idk.
• Woody Allen-Good luck with that buddy.
• Taika Watini-Awkwardness is the funniest thing to you.
• Sergio Leone-You have the attention span that many crave for. Value that.
• Terry Gilliam-You try to have faith, but you and I both know that he is never actually going to make another movie.
• Julie Taymor-Even all the other theater kids thought you were strange.
• Spike Jonze-You probably hated your creative writing teacher.
• Alfred Hitchcock-Is he though? Are you just trying to sound smart?
• Ridley Scott-Your favorite is either Alien Gladiator, or Blade Runner. Not really the others.
• Sean Baker-You log adult films on Letterboxd with no shame at all.
• Jordan Peele-You’re still upset about Tim Burton’s comment about diversity in horror.
• Brian De Palma-You’re either an absolute fiend, or are struggling with a fear of intimacy.
• Ryan Coogler-How’s that crush on Michael B. Jordan going?
• Kevin Smith-The askewniverse raised you when your parents didn’t want to.
• Tony Scott-Greasy hair, sunglasses indoors, smells of vape, but still kinda cool.
• Robert Eggers-You were that angry kid who always said they were born in the wrong time period.
• Richard Linklater-You enjoy so much of life, but definitely not sober.
• Mike Flanagan-Your favorite author is Stephen King
• Akira Kurosawa-You have amazing taste, but you know you do and let it go to your head way too easily.
• Ari Aster-Type of kid who collected bugs.
• Francis Ford Coppola-You can’t keep trying to defend Megalopolis. Just take the L on that one.
• William Wyler-Grandpa
• Roy Andersson-You’ve stifled your laughter for a lifetime.
• Robert Altman-You are quick to bring up Short Cuts whenever somebody starts gushing about Magnolia.
• James Cameron-You’re the type of guy to randomly announce he’s buying 20 acres of land for some random project he never got real experience with until now.
• Terrence Malick-You just want to live in a treehouse and murder people with Martin Sheen.
• Alejandro González Iñárritu-You got kicked out of superhero movie night after bringing Birdman.
• Yorgos Lanthimos-There are a lot of fun words to describe you. Neurotypical is not one of them.
• Darren Aronofsky-You alright buddy?
• Peter Berg-Middle school boy.
• Sam Peckinpah-You’re edgy in an old person kind of way.
• Todd Field-You’ll acknowledge something bad when it’s happening, but you're probably not going to do anything about it beyond that.
• Matthew Johnson-You wanna book a gig at the Rivoli.
• George Roy Hill-You heard of Paul Newman?
• The Daniels-Your probably a fun hang but in small doses.
• Werner Herzog-This man probably narrates in your brain constantly.
• Michael Bay-Stop
• George Miller-You really like Happy Feet and Babe. I can’t quite think of anything else he made that was successful.
• John Carpenter-Your pretty cool, likely don’t have a strong relationship with that least one of your parents, but still cool.
• George Pal-You were raised on VHS.
• David Lean-Your have strong thoughts on the “Lawrence of Arabia is gay” theory going one way or another.
• George Lucas-Have you ever seen this one movie called “The Star Wars”?
• Adrien Lyne-I can tell that dates go very interesting for you.
• Todd Field-You either want that stupid hat, or you already own it.
• Ingmar Bergman-You’re you and nobody can take that away from you.
• Wim Wenders-You have very specific expectations of what the world should be, but I can’t get mad at you, this guy is amazing.
• Andrei Tarkovsky-You keep talking about how Stalker “changed your life.” We get it.
• John Ford-You will call people “Pilgrim” unironically.
• Jacques Demy-La La Land almost winning best picture was the biggest thing to you.
• James Gunn-You’ve put together a whole soundtrack for your entire life.
• Rian Johnson-You try your hardest to channel the vibe of an eccentric sleuth but can’t quite pull it off.
• Paul Verhoeven-What is it with you and women?
• Danny Boyle-So are you going to choose life or not?

First time doing this, so idk how this will go.

• Steven Spielberg-You are a person who exists in your own basic vanilla world. (Complimentary)
• Stanley Kubrick-You sneer at modern fans who haven’t seen this man’s entire set.
• Christopher Nolan- Awww, does the little baby wanna watch real movies? Does the baby have the highest rated films online? Does the baby have a point?
• Damien Chazelle-This one honestly depends, you're either a starry eyed theater kid, or a depressed psycho.
• Baz Lurhmann-Happy and Gay.
• Gus Van Sant-Sad and Gay.
• Tim Burton-You never grew out of your middle school and phase and honestly, kudos to you for keeping with your guy,  so many of us have abandoned him.
• Denis Villeneuve-No hate, but I’m confident you haven’t watched anything made before 2005.
• Guillermo Del Toro-You were probably once a Tim Burton stan but have since moved on.
• Coen Brothers-You have amazing taste, keep it up.
• David Fincher-You probably use the term “film bro” unironically.
• Martin Scorsese-You either love or hate the “absolute cinema” meme. No inbetween.
• Sam Raimi-You like to have fun here, nice to have you. (usually) 
• Wes Anderson-You have based your entire life on this aesthetic.
• Spike Lee-Yeah yeah, “Fight the power” and all, do you have to keep getting into arguments with strangers?
• Guy Ritchie-You feel smarter hearing the British accents.
• Quentin Tarantino-For the love, stop doing the same dance move over and over again every time you go to the club, we get it, you like Pulp Fiction.
• Edgar Wright-You need to own up to your ADHD problem.
• John Hughes-You used to be fun, but are now just old and sad.
• David Lynch-“It’s kinda Lynchian” -you every freaking time you see anything strange
• Jim Jarmusch-Your such a hipster that you ended up finding real quality and I’m very happy for you.
• Greta Gerwig-Your the type of girl who seems timid but will absolutely destroy anyone who talks crap about your friends.
• Paul Thomas Anderson-I can’t make fun of you guys, you are winning rn.
• Matthew Vaughn-You don’t want to say Guy Ritchie for the answer so you picked the next best thing.
• Mel Brooks-You say you prefer classic comedy but I’ve seen you people bust a gut at a random instagram reel with no humor except racism so idk.
• Woody Allen-Good luck with that buddy.
• Taika Watini-Awkwardness is the funniest thing to you.
• Sergio Leone-You have the attention span that many crave for. Value that.
• Terry Gilliam-You try to have faith, but you and I both know that he is never actually going to make another movie.
• Julie Taymor-Even all the other theater kids thought you were strange.
• Spike Jonze-You probably hated your creative writing teacher.
• Alfred Hitchcock-Is he though? Are you just trying to sound smart?