u/EdgeOfPersonslity — reddlx

An Exercise to Identify Your Values

Today I want to tell you more about myself so I can pin this post to my profile.

Today I’ll give you an exercise to help you identify your values. And I’ll share my own values with you. Grab a piece of paper and a pen.

Draw an island in the middle of the sea. The sea represents life. There’s a small boat by the shore. You’re standing next to it. Now draw a star. This star represents your values. You get into the boat, and no matter where you are in the sea (in life)—you’ll follow this star, your values. Now flip the piece of paper over and write down what this star means to you.

When I wrote down my values using this exercise, here’s what I came up with:

Vegetarianism
Physics
Helping children from orphanages
Criminal psychology
Helping people find their purpose in life.
Girls

Write down what your values are. I’d be really interested to read them))))

reddit.com

u/EdgeOfPersonslity — 10 days ago

▲ 1 r/romance

How can you tell the difference between love and being in love?

I found a really great video by a psychologist about how love and infatuation differ. Here's link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GQEdzo3i1F4&t=301s. And I’m translating it for you.

First, infatuation can end, but love cannot. However, infatuation can turn into love. But not always.

Second, in infatuation, along with the emotion of love, there are other negative emotions—fears, anxiety, and shame. We’re afraid that we might be rejected. We worry that our infatuation might not be reciprocated. Whereas in love (mature, genuine love), aside from the emotion of love, there are no negative emotions. Instead, in addition to the emotion of love, there are many other positive emotions—joy, and a childlike, unpretentious curiosity toward this person. And every encounter with this person is accompanied not only by love but also by a surge of joy and excitement. Love can also trigger feelings of gratitude, compassion, faith, hope, and inspiration.

Third, the difference lies in strength and intensity. Being infatuated is first and foremost a hormonal surge. This leads to us being unable to behave appropriately, because the stronger our emotions are, the less we can control them. And infatuation can make us lose our minds. But true love is a calmer, more mature feeling that we can control.

Fourth, when we’re in love, all our psychological problems are magnified. We think, “Oh, am I attractive or not?”, “Oh, what if I get rejected?”, “Oh, what if I’m stupid?”, “Oh, what if they get bored with me?”. But when we’re in love, our psychological problems diminish or even disappear.

Fifth, love always includes an element of friendship. In love, tenderness comes first (though sexuality is also present). But when we’re infatuated, it’s all about sexuality.

So, does infatuation or love prevail in your relationship? Let me know if you found this information helpful.

u/EdgeOfPersonslity — 11 days ago

▲ 2 r/negativeutilitarians

Pleasure from pain. A masochistic adaptation to life’s harsh trials.

I’ve gone through a lot of tough trials in my life (to put it mildly). And that has turned me into a masochistic radical. That means that when I face some kind of life challenge, some kind of crap—I actually get a kick out of it.

I recently met a man who spent three years in captivity. Physically, he’s completely broken. And one might assume that if a person has gone through THAT much pain, they can’t live without it afterward.

I was afraid to ask him about it. So I’m asking you: Redditors who have gone through a great deal of pain in your lives, can you no longer live without it?

reddit.com

u/EdgeOfPersonslity — 13 days ago