u/Embarrassed-Brush-97

Should I F23 be upset that my b fM24doesn’t want me at his birthday party?

So I’ve been with this guy for almost a year now. He’s very sweet and things have been serious. Now that his birthday’s coming up I ask him his plans and he says he doesn’t know. Couple weeks later he tells me his friends planned a party for him the weekend before his bday and they’d most likely be going out to different clubs. Cool. Sounds fun. But he never mentions inviting me. Eventually I just asked why I was never invited to be there. It’d be different if this was just a boys night thing but he has quite of few friends who are women so…I just assumed. I’d be going with…especially since I know his friends, Weve gone out and had game nights together.

He says it’s just because he’s gonna be drunk and he doesn’t want me to see him that fucked up. Also he says if I go he feels like he’s gonna have to be in ‘protecter mode’ and he doesn’t wanna have to worry about that…I explained to him that I get it to an extent but if I’m gonna be his partner, he should feel comfortable around me

Anyway I told him that it really hurts my feelings that he doesn’t want me there and he thinks I’m not allowing him to enjoy his day how he wants and that I’m trying to tell him what he should do.

He does want to spend his actual birthday being with me but I like going out to the club and having a good time too…I don’t and to be selfish or try to control him but I’m very hurt that he doesn’t want me there. Should I be offended or is this normal?

I 23F have been seeing this guy for a couple months now. Around 7 motnhs, and I’ve never dated before him. He’s very kind, respectful, and I think we have a connection, I feel comfortable around him which is very serious for me as I’m a rather shy person. But…sometimes he says things that I just think are kind of stupid and may be signs of him being a bit misogynistic…I wouldn’t say he the worst but….sometim s he just rubs me the wrong way. Like we were talking about women’s struggles after having children and he goes ‘yeah I bet it hurts almost as much as getting kicked in the balls’ mind you…we’re talking about giving birth…I just thought that was weird. Also after talking about post part depression and how serious it is he goes ‘yeah, but men after having kids get depressed too, you know if they feel like they’re not getting enough attention from their partner’ which I believe can define You be true but like…I just feel like that’s an odd response. Another time I told him about how if I got married I wouldn’t want to change my last name and at most I wouldn’t hyphenate it, he tells me ‘you say that now but when your in love it’ll change’ I don’t like that either. Very weird. At least to me I guess. During our most recent hangout we both heard about a female celebrity getting cheated on and he says ‘Yeah she was stupid’ basically saying that she should have known he was a cheater and it’s her fault for being with him. Instead of just being a normal fucking person and saying ‘Yeah that sucks man…’

I don’t know, maybe I’m being too harsh, he’s shown me sighs that he’s a good guy but sometimes he opens his mouth and he just sounds like a weirdo to me…

Am I being too hard on him?