u/EnvironmentalPut3135

excuse my english and grammar since English's not my mother language.

me (17F) and my girlfriend (19F) have been in a relationship for over a year, we've always had ups and downs but now im starting to really realise what this relationship brings into my life.

she has avoidant attatchment and has problems with communication, i am anxious and I've always tolerated this behaviour for the sake of the relationship and because we wanted to heal together.

so far, i started to heal and she did too, but much less.

we still have problems communicating and I'm really starting to feel like im the only one putting effort and continuing the relationship, and she's just there.

I'm starting to resent her for this, this sunday we had a serious conversation and I've told her that im reaching my limit, that she never acknowledge my feelings and that she's always putting herself first (which is not a problem generally but in arguments it's starting to become one). she said that she will go to therapy because she cares about our relationship, so i just waited.

today we had a conversation and this subject came up again, making me feel more alone that ever.

she says that she doesn't understand me while i feel like she isn't even trying to. i just said "i figured" and she responded with "im sorry".

i feel stuck in this situation, i also have R- OCD and things are heavy for me, she knows that.

im starting to feel alone in my own relationship and i don't know if things are ever going to change or im just holding on endlessly when i should just let go.

i could really use some advice here, should i continue being patient or should i move on?

how can i handle this situation in a way that a secure attatchment person would?

hello, I'm 17 and i was recently diagnosed with OCD. i have a lot of themes and I'm starting to think that one of them might be relationship ocd.

i never fully acknowledged what ocd was for my entire life until i started to skip meals because of the fear of contamination or checking doors compulsively, then i started to see a psychiatrist and it all summed up to ocd (i am fully aware that it's a proper diagnosis because i know that i align with the symptoms of this disorder).

however, I've been in a relationship this entire time and my girlfriend has seen my ocd rise up until i got a diagnosis, now she helps me with fears and compulsions and she's very supportive of me.

this is the problem i wanted to talk about: my entire relationship I've been struggling with doubts and jealousy and this really messed up my relationship because almost everything that my girlfriend did or said was suspicious to me and i was convinced that there was something behind it. we had a lot of problem because of ex talks because i really couldn't let go the thought of her kissing her exes or even her crushing on them. i was mad and i would cry almost everyday because of this and it really affected my self-image and my relationship with my gf, which i value a lot.

i have retro-active jealousy, endless doubts and suspicion for this girl who really just wants to spend some time with me and loves me.

this problem is following me even now and it's making me tired, im exhausted of always suspecting something or trying to play detective because she isn't responding.

i always thought it was my fear of abandonment/replacement that stems from trauma that made me this unsufferable, but now I'm thinking it might be R-OCD. i think it could be both or my ocd is feeding from my trauma to make my life worse.

i really need some advice on how to get over these episodes because in those moments i don't really understand if what im thinking is real or if im just overreacting.

hello, I'm 17 and i was recently diagnosed with OCD. i have a lot of themes and I'm starting to think that one of them might be relationship ocd.

i never fully acknowledged what ocd was for my entire life until i started to skip meals because of the fear of contamination or checking doors compulsively, then i started to see a psychiatrist and it all summed up to ocd (i am fully aware that it's a proper diagnosis because i know that i align with the symptoms of this disorder).

however, I've been in a relationship this entire time and my girlfriend has seen my ocd rise up until i got a diagnosis, now she helps me with fears and compulsions and she's very supportive of me.

this is the problem i wanted to talk about: my entire relationship I've been struggling with doubts and jealousy and this really messed up my relationship because almost everything that my girlfriend did or said was suspicious to me and i was convinced that there was something behind it. we had a lot of problem because of ex talks because i really couldn't let go the thought of her kissing her exes or even her crushing on them. i was mad and i would cry almost everyday because of this and it really affected my self-image and my relationship with my gf, which i value a lot.

i have retro-active jealousy, endless doubts and suspicion for this girl who really just wants to spend some time with me and loves me.

this problem is following me even now and it's making me tired, im exhausted of always suspecting something or trying to play detective because she isn't responding.

i always thought it was my fear of abandonment/replacement that stems from trauma that made me this unsufferable, but now I'm thinking it might be R-OCD. i think it could be both or my ocd is feeding from my trauma to make my life worse.

i really need some advice on how to get over these episodes because in those moments i don't really understand if what im thinking is real or if im just overreacting.