u/Expensive-Cry-5219

Hey everyone, I’m a 21-year-old Black male and I’m in a really tough place right now. I have ADHD, which makes my overthinking and anxiety pretty intense, and I just really need some human perspective and advice on a situation with my best friend.

I’ve been friends with him (21M) since we were kids. Over the years, I’ve developed deep feelings for him and have had a crush on him since high school. He doesn't know about my feelings, but we've always been super close.

A few months ago, right before a christmas, he asked me if I wanted to go on a trip out of town with him. I was incredibly excited, said yes, and cleared it with my parents. They told me it was okay at first.

But on the actual day we were supposed to leave, my parents completely flipped. They started heavily guilt tripping me about bailing on family time during the holidays. I tried to compromise and make both sides happy, but everything fell apart and I ended up having to cancel on him last minute.

I know it left a terrible taste in his mouth. Ever since then, whenever I reach out, he is incredibly distant and cold. I recently texted him again just to check in. He gave a brief reply saying he was swamped with some personal projects, but when I tried to keep the conversation going, he left me on read.

I feel like an absolute monster. I've tried to move on, but he's completely stuck in my head. I deeply regret letting my parents guilt me into bailing on him, and I'm terrified that I ruined a lifelong friendship.

How can I fix a communication breakdown like this when I'm the one who messed up? How do I give him space without completely losing him?

TL;DR: Bailed last minute on a holiday trip with my childhood friend/longtime crush because my parents guilt-tripped me on departure day. Now he’s cold, distant, and leaving me on read. Feel terrible and don't know how to repair the bond.

Hey everyone, I’m a 21-year-old Black male and I’m in a really tough place right now. I have ADHD, which makes my overthinking and anxiety pretty intense, and I just really need some human perspective and advice on a situation with my best friend.

I’ve been friends with him (21M) since we were kids. Over the years, I’ve developed deep feelings for him and have had a crush on him since high school. He doesn't know about my feelings, but we've always been super close.

A few months ago, right before a Christmas, he asked me if I wanted to go on a trip out of town with him. I was incredibly excited, said yes, and cleared it with my parents. They told me it was okay at first.

But on the actual day we were supposed to leave, my parents completely flipped. They started heavily guilt tripping me about bailing on family time during the holidays. I tried to compromise and make both sides happy, but everything fell apart and I ended up having to cancel on him last minute.

I know it left a terrible taste in his mouth. Ever since then, whenever I reach out, he is incredibly distant and cold. I recently texted him again just to check in. He gave a brief reply saying he was swamped with some personal projects, but when I tried to keep the conversation going, he left me on read.

I feel like an absolute monster. I've tried to move on, but he's completely stuck in my head. I deeply regret letting my parents guilt me into bailing on him, and I'm terrified that I ruined a lifelong friendship.

How can I fix a communication breakdown like this when I'm the one who messed up? How do I give him space without completely losing him?

TL;DR: Bailed last minute on a holiday trip with my childhood friend/longtime crush because my parents guilt-tripped me on departure day. Now he’s cold, distant, and leaving me on read. Feel terrible and don't know how to repair the bond.

Hey everyone, I’m a 21-year-old Black male and I’m in a really tough place right now. I have ADHD, which makes my overthinking and anxiety pretty intense, and I just really need some human perspective and advice on a situation with my best friend.

​I’ve been friends with him (21M) since we were kids. Over the years, I’ve developed deep feelings for him and have had a crush on him since high school. He doesn't know about my feelings, but we've always been super close.

​A few months ago, right before a christmas, he asked me if I wanted to go on a trip out of town with him. I was incredibly excited, said yes, and cleared it with my parents. They told me it was okay at first.

​But on the actual day we were supposed to leave, my parents completely flipped. They started heavily guilt tripping me about bailing on family time during the holidays. I tried to compromise and make both sides happy, but everything fell apart and I ended up having to cancel on him last minute.

​I know it left a terrible taste in his mouth. Ever since then, whenever I reach out, he is incredibly distant and cold. I recently texted him again just to check in. He gave a brief reply saying he was swamped with some personal projects, but when I tried to keep the conversation going, he left me on read.

​I feel like an absolute monster. I've tried to move on, but he's completely stuck in my head. I deeply regret letting my parents guilt me into bailing on him, and I'm terrified that I ruined a lifelong friendship.

​How can I fix a communication breakdown like this when I'm the one who messed up? How do I give him space without completely losing him?

​TL;DR: Bailed last minute on a holiday trip with my childhood friend/longtime crush because my parents guilt-tripped me on departure day. Now he’s cold, distant, and leaving me on read. Feel terrible and don't know how to repair the bond.