AITBA for breaking up with my partner
So I was dating this guy long distance. But we spoke everyday and met up whenever we can. At first it was amazing. Then towards the end, plans tried getting made but they always ended up getting pushed back on his end. When I tried to remake the plans I kept getting answers like “we will plan something” after I questioned him if he actually wants to see me or not. He finally arranged a meet up again. During that time he was getting confused about the train times but he has done the journey before which I’m confused about. And then his mate said he’s not coming down for the weekend due to he’s playing games with them but then quickly retracted back after saying he was only joking. The day before he was suppose to come down he cancelled last minute at night, saying he can’t come down due to the fact that his grandad had a heart attack and is in hospital so he’s going to see him that night. I accepted it and wished him well, and hope his grandad gets better and so on. The next time he messaged saying he was seeing his nan and he will contact me when he’s back home that night. I again wished him well and hope everything is okay, he stated that he was thankful for understanding. I suggested instead of pushing the meet up till the next month which at the time was 3 weeks away I stated for him to come down after everything is okay and when he’s free he then back tracked his statement saying that he’s staying at his nans tonight (5 minute reply time) I accepted it as that. Now since he went home I tried being there for him and making conversation and he didn’t reciprocated it at all. But never stated he didn’t want to talk. This went on for a week. He then would leave me on delivered for hours on end but message other people at the time. I know this because he was streaming and he stated it live. I then broke up with him politely stating to him that I do like him but the relationship isn’t working if he doesn’t put in any effort. To which he replied with “yh” I feel bad tho for doing it due to incase he was telling the truth about his grandad but then he wasn’t putting in any effort into us anymore but will to everyone else. Since then he’s put in effort and then stop etc, but I did kept my distance as I can’t afford to get hurt more than what I am. He then announced to everyone we broke up but wouldn’t tell anyone why so I had been spammed by multiple people. I then receive a message today from one of his brother’s girlfriends that apparently his family was talking about how all I do is control my now ex boyfriend. But his family hardly knows me. I haven’t messaged him about it as I don’t know what to believe but I am hurt that if it’s true as all I did was support him and cared for him. I don’t get how I could’ve been controlling when I was asking if he’s eaten and okay and so on. As he doesn’t eat a lot. And that I asked for us to call at least once a week. As he stopped calling. He even agreed to that boundary saying that it’s completely fine. But I thought calling once a week even for an hour was minimum in a relationship. So I don’t know what to believe or do. I just feel like I’m bad one for breaking up with him and I could actually be controlling.. I still like him but am deeply hurt and don’t know who to trust… please help or give advice