u/Few_Mulberry8572

I have no idea what sub to put this in so I’m very sorry that this probably isn’t relevant!

I've been heavily struggling with insecurities over my appearance for all my teenage years and am currently in my late teens(girl). About 5 months ago I got my first ever (celebrity) crush, who is a man and I gradually found my self fantasising about literally turning into him but still being me, with my life. I’m so sorry I have no idea how to word this normally!

Anyway I found that the desire to look like him became stronger and stronger to the point where it’s all I can think about. At the moment I feel very depressed mainly because I just wish I looked like him so badly and hate how I look so much. I always daydream about waking up with his body and am constantly wishing it will magically happen somehow. The more I think about it the more depressed I feel and I’m just at such a low due to multiple things but my insecurities are definitely the main cause.

The strange thing is though I have no desire become a man, I just want to look like him or similar. If I woke up randomly and changed gender I wouldn’t be happy at all I just really am jealous of HIM specifically.

Also I completely avoid putting effort in myself and have since forever because of my low self esteem, I feel a sick at the thought of putting effort in myself as a girl (hypothetically as a guy too I guess). The only way I could imagine not feeling so shit about myself is waking with the body of this celebrity.

I know all of this sounds absolutely crazy and very silly, probably irrelevant to this sub too but I’m just so confused about my feelings. I’m feeling so lost at the moment. yea basically I have no desire to just become a guy, I want just to be him!! I’m sorry this sounds insane.

has anybody got any advice to get over this or has felt a similar way(probably not lol). Thank you!

I don’t really understand the point of comm mode, it increases the percentage of each stat by like 0.1 when they level up.. I don’t see the point of it. it gets repetitive after a while, also what is the max level? thanks!

genuine question I hope I don’t sound like I just want the label haha, I also understand that being insecure is very common among teenagers. I’m not sure if this question is allowed on the sub but I couldn’t see anything against it.

anyway- I’m in my late teens(girl) and ive never put any effort in my appearance because i despise how i look so much, whenever i see myself i feel pretty depressed and try to avoid it (eg mirrors, photos). I hate seeing people because i just hate how i look and feel so embarrassed, i feel physically sick when i look at myself and prefer to not make any effort at all. I feel like even if i tried i would look absolutely terrible, when i do i feel extremely ugly and more depressed than before i just can’t explain how much i hate it and would much rather wear bad clothes and stay looking like ive not tried.

I think everybody around me thinks I don’t care how I look when it’s the complete opposite, I hate how I look and just feel so physically sick when I try make an effort (or not). I’m very curious wether this is BDD because all the examples I see are when you obsessively put alot of effort in you appearance instead of avoiding it