u/Fickle-Message-9995

Great idea in theory, sure. A subreddit people can post on when they have some moral dilemma and are conflicted over some confrontation they had. The problem is that it seems to have been taken over completely by trolls and people who look at human behavior as being completely black-and-white, ignoring any sort of nuanced gray area. Any sort of detail I add to provide context to the story gets downvoted. And even posters who aren’t completely taking my side (NAH, ESH, asking for my info) get AGGRESSIVELY downvoted. It seems to me that what started off as a genuine self help subreddit has been completely invaded by keyboard warriors.

My wife and I have a secluded river spot we like to swim at (Muchyedo Banks in NH. Giving the name of it for reference so that people can visualize the story better). Getting to the spot requires sliding down steep sand banks and climbing back out. It is not an easy spot to get to, but worth it cuz there is a small flat landing on the bottom. Kayakers and boats regularly go down that river and usually dock at the flatter beach across from us (which can’t be accessed by vehicle/foot).

We were there the other day and a family rolled right up to us on kayaks; a father, mother and two teen daughters. The mother asked if they can dock real quick. I assumed they just had to take care of something real quick before paddling back on their journey but they seemed to basically be settling in next to us. Swimming in the water RIGHT NEXT TO US, mother trying to make small talk with us, daughters playing in the clay deposit that is near our spot (covering themselves with clay and then jumping into the water). The father, however, had no part in it. He paddled across the river and waited for them on the flatter beach. He said he was gonna go “wait in the shade” but I think he felt the awkwardness of the interaction.

Eventually my wife pulled the bandaid, waited until her daughters were out of earshot and said “You know, we were kinda hoping to have a private beach moment” and she got super defensive “Well it’s a public beach!” Which is true yes. But I also feel like public use recreation areas operate an unspoken rule of first come first serve etiquette. Like you wouldn’t go sit at a picnic table in a park with a couple or a family who is using it.

The part that really frustrated us was that they had way more mobility with their kayaks and had tons of options of places to dock (including the flat beach across the river that dad was waiting at) and instead they docked right next to the small piece of flat land that we had to climb down to.

I feel guilty because that clay deposit must be somewhere her daughters like to go to all the time. It must be a regular stop on their kayak route. However, I also feel like mom could have taught her daughters an important lesson in flexibility and respecting others’ space by saying “Not today. Somebody else is there”. That is where I’m conflicted. She is right, it is public land, and that is where I’m conflicted. But it felt like we were intruded upon.

She eventually paddled away sarcastically yelling “ENJOY YOUR PRIVATE BEACH!”