My mom is berating me over this and it really hurt my feelings
So to start with, I'm 23, and I am a boy mom to two boys aged 1 year and 4 years old. Just this week, my husband and I bought the tickets to our second (anime) convention. We went to our first one in November of last year, and we took our two kids with us. It was fun! My husband and son dressed up in cosplay, and I didn't dress up because I waited way too late, like super last minute to attempt to look for a cosplay costume. My youngest was only 9 months old at the time of the 1st convention, so I couldn't dress him up either because there is no cosplay that small.
Now we are approaching our 2nd convention in August. My husband and I bought our cosplay, and we're both dressing up this time. I asked my best friend if she wouldn't mind watching our two boys while we're at the convention in the next town over for a day, and she agreed. I came up with a silly idea that made me laugh. I thought about if she wouldn't be able to watch them since she texted me that its not guaranteed. So I decided that if I had to take them with me and end up toting around a heavy wagon, then I should make it fun. I had the silly and ridiculous idea to dress up my 1 year old in a Strawberry Shortcake bow and tutu since its a convention, and no one dresses normal at a convention anyways. It's just harmless and silly dress up for a baby who doesn't know a circle from a triangle. My 4 year old however, will wear something like a Goku cosplay or some spiderman cosplay since there is something that can fit him, but there is still nothing that fits my little man. It's just for a couple hours anyways. It's harmless dress up. No one would even know he's a boy. He already gets mistaken for a little girl because of his long eyelashes, even when he's wearing all blue and very clearly has something like, "Baby brother" or "Momma's boy" on his clothes.
To clear up any confusion, I raise my little boys as boys all the time. They get dirty, play in dirt, fight with each other, etc. Today, my mom sent me a text. It was a bible verse saying something like I'm literally detesting God by putting my son in a dress. She then called me and lectured me that I'm cursing me/ my son's life by doing that, and I'm opening a door for the devil, and that it's demonic. She even went as far as saying that when he gets older, that he might develop a preference for wearing dresses because of this one little day that I put him in a bow and a tutu. Sheesh. That was so uncalled for and a bit extreme. He won't even remember any of this because he's only 1! I tried explaining to her many of times that it's a little harmless dress up, and cross dressing is extremely common in conventions and on top of that, that that's not how that works. My son won't suddenly decide at 12/13 that he wants to wear dresses because of ONE day he can't even remember! You think she listened? Nope! She even went as far as to say that God will curse me to never have a daughter of my own because I'm doing that. Like....ouch that really hurt my feelings. She knows how bad I want a little girl, and I think she's reaching and just trying to say anything to scare me from going through with this.
I know my mom is like this because she's a very devoted Christian woman, but that's just wrong and hurtful what she told me. Now me wanting a daughter has very little to do with the dress up because I absolutely love and adore my sons as they are. Everyone compliments my little family saying how I have such a beautiful family with my two boys, and I love that. One day though, I do hope for a daughter, but I never let that disrupt my bond I have with my two boys. It's simply a silly idea I thought of since literally no one dresses normal in conventions and there's literally no cosplay I could find sized 18-24 months. I've been to one convention already and I've seen two furries, and I personally love furries! Like there could be the manliest, most ripped, and buff guy there but he'll decide to cosplay as Strawberry Shortcake, but no one bats an eye or looks at him weird because it's a damn convention where people dress up and pretend to be their characters so no one would care about a baby wearing opposite gender clothing! Even if I did go up to people and tell them, they would probably just comment on how cute and adorable he looks in it.
Honestly, my mom can cry and lecture me about it until she's blue in the face. I'm a grown woman living in a whole different state away from her, so as long as I'm not abusing my kids, and I'm taking care of them, then it's not her business if that's what I choose to do with MY son. This isn't the first time I've put him in a bow and tutu! Last time I did, I didn't take him anywhere like that. I snapped a few pictures, my husband and I had a good laugh, then I took it off. I think she only thinks it's wrong because he's gonna be out in public like that, and I would be introducing him to people at the convention as a girl, using a fake girl name. I'm not giving people my real name either. I'm introducing myself with my fake name, Indigo, so what? I'm going to suffer in eternal damnation and suffering all because I had a little harmless fun at a convention? That's a messed up thing to tell anybody. Please tell me I'm not in the wrong for doing this, and is there anything I could tell her to get her to understand it better or at least not panic over it? I lied told her that I'm just gonna leave the boys with my best friend after all and that was the end of the conversation. Truth is, I already browsed Ebay and made a purchase for a matching bow and tutu. Obviously, I'm in a completely different state than her any she wouldn't know if I did or didn't take my sons with me. But I guess I'm just looking for advice on how to navigate this situation and reassurance that I'm not an awful mom for simply putting my child in opposite gender clothing. (One final thing to add, my husband feels the same as me and just thinks this is all a little harmless dress up, so he's on my side.)