u/FootballGloomy3635

This has been a bad habit that started since they were 7 months. I have tried everything to break it, but nothing seems to work. I really need some tips. There are 2 main scenarios:

Scenario 1: high chair, even if they still want to eat, they will toss everything to the floor, ask me to pick it up, eat some, toss it again, and repeat. I have tried ending meal time when this happens, keeps happening though. They also toss food when they are done, so not sure what to do here.

Scenario 2: when we are outside (park, mall, etc), they will ask for their sippy cup, take 2 sips, toss it harshly to floor, and move on. I do not know what to do in this scenario other than pick it up, and give it back to them when they ask, it's not like we can leave it on the floor. A couple of glass bottles have been broken from doing this (my bad for giving her glass bottles outside).

I am at a loss, I don't know what to do.

It feels like I am posting every day but Reddit is honestly our only souce of tips, zero family help, so really appreciate your support 🙏.

My 17mo baby started with tantrums, tantrums for nothing and everything. The one in the morning before breakfast happens every day like clockwork. What we have noticed is that if my husband is there, my baby will not calm down, they will demand that he picks them up and will cry desperatily until he does. Since yesterday, I started asking him to leave me alone with them during a tantrum. The baby calms down in 30 seconds, all I do is sit next to them and offer some toys to play, and they start laughing, as if nothing happened. If my husband stays, the baby can go on having a tantrum for at least 15 to 20 minutes.

Ever since we realized this, he feels awful, he hates that he is the reason the baby can't regulate alone, and that he isn't a calming presence. I do understand why it happens, I love and play with my baby but I am usually also handling logistics (food, clothesz etc), and he is usually playing with them during that time, so I think the baby feels closer to him maybe (stab to my heart 🥲)?

He wants to also help them.to calm down but what can he do? How can he be a calming presence for the baby during tantrums?

My baby is 16mo and just started with tantrums for nothing and everything, throwing themselves to the floor, crying histerically, etc, fun times. My husband and I have different ideas on how to handle and we are not sure which or if either is best so really looking for tips.

My approach is if they are clean, fed and safe, I will just let them have their moment, I'll be close but not intervene. Eventually they calm down and we continue with our day. I was alone with baby for 4 days (husband on business trip) and they only had 1 tantrum for 10 minutes.

My husband's approach is to try to pacify them let it be trying to hold them (they try to break free), walking them around, offering distractions, etc. Eventually they will find something ti catch their attention and will move on. He has been back for 2 days now, and baby has had 6 tantrums, they look for my husband and he goes along with his usual way to handle them. Baby doesn't care I am there, they look for their dad. After a while (15 mins or so) we managed to move on with our day. I know he does it out of love but even he is tired of this.

He thinks my method is too harsh on the baby, I think his method is too exhausting and not really helping.

Maybe I am wrong, maybe we are both wrong. Any suggestions?

Extra details: we are first time.parents with zero support from family so not really anyone else to ask for tips 😅

Are there any parks (MTV or south bay anywhere) where I could take my small portable propane grill for a BBQ? The ones close to me have a sign specifically saying no personal BBQs.