u/Foreverinsecuregirl

im a smaller girl and ppl tend to take advantage of that and treat me any kind of way because im not confrontational and they know i wont really defend myself. Other women keep pushing my buttons and im getting fed up. i’ve been in the gym trying to increase my strength and gains. However, i know the gym alone is not enough and wont magically teach me how to fight.

I had unprotected sex with someone new and ever since, I’ve been stuck in this cycle of convincing myself I have something. Every little thing feels like a sign.

Literally the other day I was deep in my own head, fully convincing myself I had it, and then out of nowhere a reel started playing on my dad’s phone and said the exact word I’m terrified of. It’s just fueling my anxiety.

I feel like I hear or see that word everywhere. Sometimes it’s not even there, but my brain thinks it is. If it is there, my eyes lock onto it instantly. I even catch myself avoiding saying certain things because my brain is convinced I’ll somehow manifest it.

I’m getting tested after the window period, but the waiting is honestly the hardest part. Just wondering if anyone else’s health anxiety is fixated on something right now too.

I don’t really know where else to ask this, but I haven’t felt right since a recent sexual experience and I’m struggling to make sense of it.

When I got home afterward, I felt so disgusted with myself that I wanted to cry. I sat there replaying everything in my head over and over. I couldn’t shake this overwhelming feeling of being dirty and unclean. Not physically unclean, but emotionally. It’s hard to put into words. I just felt gross, ashamed, and deeply uncomfortable in my own skin.

Before we even hung out, I was already on the verge of tears because of the way he had been talking to me. He would get mad at the smallest things I did and he would say things that made me feel small, dismissed, and like my feelings didn’t matter. Looking back, I ignored a lot of red flags because I was trying to see the good in him.

When we first started talking, he made it seem like he was genuinely interested in me. I was very clear from the beginning that I didn’t want my time wasted or to be led on. He acted like he wanted the same things I did and presented himself in a way that made me believe he was actually interested in getting to know me. Because of that, I let my guard down. I believed him.

When we got together, I told him I wasn’t ready to have sex yet. I said no multiple times, but he kept asking and pushing until I eventually gave in. Then during sex, I repeatedly told him I did not want him to finish inside me. I said no more than once, but he did it anyway.

At one point, he asked if he could record me. I immediately said no. Instead of respecting that, he grabbed his phone and started trying to record anyway before eventually putting it down.

The entire experience felt degrading. I didn’t feel desired in a caring way. I felt like I was being worn down, ignored, and treated like my boundaries were inconveniences rather than things that deserved respect. I felt more like an object than a person.

What hurts even more is how he acted afterward. The way he spoke to me changed. He talked to me like I was beneath him. He would make comments that made me feel humiliated and reduced to something sexual rather than a human being with feelings. There was this constant sense that I was somehow the problem. If he was rude, it was my fault. If he got angry, it was my fault. If he treated me badly, somehow I deserved it.

I’ve spent the last couple of days questioning myself. Part of me is angry at him, but a lot of that anger has turned inward. I keep thinking about what I should have done differently. I keep asking myself why I stayed, why I didn’t leave, why I ignored my instincts.

The strongest feeling, though, is this sense of disgust with myself, and I hate that I feel that way. I keep wanting to shower. I keep replaying everything in my head. I feel embarrassed, ashamed, sad, and honestly kind of heartbroken. I don’t feel like myself.

Has anyone else experienced this kind of emotional aftermath after a sexual experience? Is it normal to feel this “unclean” afterward, and if so, how did you work through it?

Hi everyone. I am a 22 year old female, and my 27 year old sister has schizophrenia. Our mom passed away a few years ago, so my dad, who is in his 70s, is now her primary caregiver.

Lately, I feel like she is becoming more and more unstable, and I am really worried. She showers with household cleaning products, has a very hard time remembering things, is terrified to be in the house or sleep in her own room, and sometimes walks outside naked. She also puts herself in dangerous situations by constantly getting involved with random men who take advantage of her, just to name a few of the things she does when she is having a psychotic episode.

She follows my dad around almost 24 hours a day and gives him an incredibly hard time. Watching him deal with it every day is heartbreaking. I find myself starting to resent her, and I hate feeling that way because I know she did not choose this illness. Deep down, I love my sister, but I also see what this is doing to my dad, and it is devastating.

I am also carrying a lot of trauma from growing up around her psychotic episodes. There were times I genuinely feared for my life because of the things she did to me, my parents, herself, and other people. She can become violent, and it is scary. She is not consistent with taking her medication and often refuses it altogether. She is in and out of psychiatric facilities constantly, and as awful as it sounds, those are the only times my dad and I get a break.

She has also been placed in group homes before, but because she still has the legal right to make her own decisions, she always chooses to leave. Usually it is because of paranoia or other symptoms that come with her illness, and she comes up with reasons why she cannot stay. It feels like every attempt at getting her stable eventually falls apart because she is able to walk away from the help she needs.

What scares me the most is that my dad will not be here forever. I honestly do not think I am capable of becoming her caregiver after everything we have been through, and I am struggling with the guilt that comes with feeling that way. I just want my dad to be able to have some peace, and I want my sister to be somewhere safe where she can get the level of care she clearly needs.

I have suggested that my dad look into becoming her legal guardian because I truly do not think she is capable of making safe decisions for herself anymore. We are also wondering if there are permanent residential care options for someone in her condition, especially since she can be a danger to herself and sometimes to others.

If anyone has experience with this, especially in Florida, could you please tell me what steps we would need to take for guardianship or permanent placement? Any advice or resources would mean so much. We feel completely overwhelmed and do not know where to start.

I’m 22 and I have a 27 y/o schizophrenic sister that has caused so much pain and distress to our family. Seeing what she has put both my parents throug, my mom who is now deceased and my dad who is in his 70s. I’m starting to resent her. She can’t live on her own, she refuses to be consistent with her medication and is in out of of the mental hospital every other week.

Im mainly worried about my dad he is all i have left and she’s putting so much stress on him. She needs to get out. I care about her and i know she can’t control it but i’ve grown a fatigue towards her because of what she has put our family through.

Are there any facilities she can go to that will keep her permanently and ensure she’s well cared for? Because the only thing the hospital does is dope her up and send her on her merry way and the cycle repeats over and over.

My dad won’t be here forever and i don’t want her to be left to fend for herself once he’s gone. I do wanna make sure she’s alright at the end of the day, and I wanna see if I can relieve some of the stress on my dad while he’s still here.

I’m 22 and I have a 27 y/o schizophrenic sister that has caused so much pain and distress to our family. Seeing what she has put both my parents throug, my mom who is now deceased and my dad who is in his 70s. I’m starting to resent her. She can’t live on her own, she refuses to be consistent with her medication and is in out of of the mental hospital every other week.

Im mainly worried about my dad he is all i have left and she’s putting so much stress on him. She needs to get out. I care about her and i know she can’t control it but i’ve grown a fatigue towards her because of what she has put our family through.

Are there any facilities she can go to that will keep her permanently and ensure she’s well cared for? Because the only thing the hospital does is dope her up and send her on her merry way and the cycle repeats over and over.

My dad won’t be here forever and i don’t want her to be left to fend for herself once he’s gone. I do wanna make sure she’s alright at the end of the day, and I wanna see if I can relieve some of the stress on my dad while he’s still here.