u/FullBudget9111

30m, 7 months sober & gamble-free, living with parents, rebuilding financially/self-employed

After years of drinking, gambling, and generally escaping from my life, I finally decided to get help and make serious changes. I’m now 7 months sober and gamble-free, which has honestly been the best decision I’ve made in a long time.

That said, I’m still dealing with the financial aftermath of years of bad decisions. I currently have around $75k in debt, recently left a corporate job that was making me miserable, and moved back in with my parents while I rebuild financially and work on growing my own business. I’m making less money right now, but for the first time in years I actually feel aligned with the direction my life is going.

Recently, I started talking to someone I genuinely really like, and feelings seem mutual. My fear is that once the full picture of my situation comes out - the debt, recent sobriety, rebuilding my life at 30, it’ll completely change how she sees me.

I’m not planning to hide any of it, but I’m curious if anyone has dated during a major rebuilding phase in life. If you were on either side of this situation, how did it go? Was honesty and effort enough, or did the instability overshadow everything else?

I also know some people will say I shouldn’t even be dating while making this many life changes, but part of me feels like if I keep waiting until I’m “fully fixed” or perfectly stable, I’ll spend my entire life postponing connection and happiness.

30m, 7 months sober & gamble-free, living with parents, rebuilding financially/self-employed

After years of drinking, gambling, and generally escaping from my life, I finally decided to get help and make serious changes. I’m now 7 months sober and gamble-free, which has honestly been the best decision I’ve made in a long time.

That said, I’m still dealing with the financial aftermath of years of bad decisions. I currently have around $75k in debt, recently left a corporate job that was making me miserable, and moved back in with my parents while I rebuild financially and work on growing my own business. I’m making less money right now, but for the first time in years I actually feel aligned with the direction my life is going.

Recently, I started talking to someone I genuinely really like, and feelings seem mutual. My fear is that once the full picture of my situation comes out - the debt, recent sobriety, rebuilding my life at 30, it’ll completely change how she sees me.

I’m not planning to hide any of it, but I’m curious if anyone has dated during a major rebuilding phase in life. If you were on either side of this situation, how did it go? Was honesty and effort enough, or did the instability overshadow everything else?

I also know some people will say I shouldn’t even be dating while making this many life changes, but part of me feels like if I keep waiting until I’m “fully fixed” or perfectly stable, I’ll spend my entire life postponing connection and happiness.

30m, 7 months sober & gamble-free, living with parents, rebuilding financially/self-employed

After years of drinking, gambling, and generally escaping from my life, I finally decided to get help and make serious changes. I’m now 7 months sober and gamble-free, which has honestly been the best decision I’ve made in a long time.

That said, I’m still dealing with the financial aftermath of years of bad decisions. I currently have around $75k in debt, recently left a corporate job that was making me miserable, and moved back in with my parents while I rebuild financially and work on growing my own business. I’m making less money right now, but for the first time in years I actually feel aligned with the direction my life is going.

Recently, I started talking to someone I genuinely really like, and feelings seem mutual. My fear is that once the full picture of my situation comes out - the debt, recent sobriety, rebuilding my life at 30, it’ll completely change how she sees me.

I’m not planning to hide any of it, but I’m curious if anyone has dated during a major rebuilding phase in life. If you were on either side of this situation, how did it go? Was honesty and effort enough, or did the instability overshadow everything else?

I also know some people will say I shouldn’t even be dating while making this many life changes, but part of me feels like if I keep waiting until I’m “fully fixed” or perfectly stable, I’ll spend my entire life postponing connection and happiness.