A rough week
Hi everyone, I hope all of you are doing well. This has literally been the worst week of my life. I’m a teenage girl and I know a lot of you are wiser than I, so I need some help. Also, the meal attached is a seafood boil with garlic noodles—-if you’re ever in Hell’s Kitchen NY check out shaking crab!
I’ve liked a guy for six months. I met him through a volunteer organization and i always sensed something between us because of his body language and some of the things he would say in our conversation. We didn’t interact much outside of volunteering, but a couple of weeks ago, when I didn’t show up, he sent me a message saying “you really ditched me Friday” and attached was a selfie of himself frowning. I responded with something dumb which I thought was cool for whatever reason and the conversation ended pretty quickly.
At this point, I thought, ‘oh he must like me.’ All signs were kind of pointing to it but I’m also completely delusional.
I texted him a bit after that but I suck at texting so none of the conversations were interesting at all. A week ago, I saw my friend had followed him. He has 100 followers which isn’t many so I thought it was pretty bizarre. This same friend had previously been my best friend but I found out she dated her best friend and my friend’s situationship behind her back for two months… And when I confronted her about it she turned it on me saying “the first thing I think of when I think of you is you cutting people off” when I told her to dump him because she barely likes him. I still loved her though, even though she hasn’t been treating me well over the past couple of years. Then, I found out she didn’t invite me to a party she threw so I thought communication was the way to go so I called her sobbing and expressing how I felt about our friendship and she responded with a very fake tone of voice saying “noo I’m so sorry you feel that way!” And I was super offended because clearly I cared way too much and much more than her. After that, I felt a little better because I thought we were in a better place, but I still wanted to distance myself because of what she did to my friend.
I was hanging out with that same friend who is her best friend on Saturday, and she told me that girl had started volunteering at the museum a month ago. I was surprised it hadn’t come up because everyone knows I volunteer there and like a guy from there. And I’ve told her multiple stories about it. I was surprised because this girl also isn’t the academic or do things for the good of humanity type of person.
Then my friend told me she apparently (while having a boyfriend) really likes one guy there and asked him out. At this point I knew it but I was hanging onto hope, so long story short it was the same guy and she claimed she “forgot”
I kind of understand why he would agree to go out with her even if he did like me just because she’s super direct and confident and whatever we have is ambiguous and unpromised and I can’t give him anything more right now.
I didn’t speak to her after that, but the next day, I met up with a different friend to talk things through when my friend called me saying she had something very serious to tell me. I was caught so off guard and told her to tell me right then but she refused and told me to find a place to sit. I sat down, and she told me my other friend >!had passed away a week prior in a terrible, terrible way.!<
I was screaming and crying on the sidewalk and I was so in shock I couldn’t even have a panic attack. I still obviously haven’t recovered from any of this and this was just five days ago and I’m doing the best I can to be mature about it, but does anyone have any advice?