u/FuuraKafu

Common take: ​there is no real pleasure on​ camera, the creators only give a performance, they numb themselves so they don't feel a thing, their acts and positions are all uncomfortable, they are probably addicted to drugs and are coerced into it.

A lot of the language in these discussions ​suggests that the people making these arguments only know of "classic" studio porn. Long, drawn out scenes with wild angles, enormous dicks only, very rough sex only, guranateed deepthroating, ​actors taking drugs to keep them going, the males get shit injected into their penises...

The thing is that the porn landscape has changed a LOT over the past decade or so, there is now factually ​far more independent content​ on the internet than studio porn. There is​. I do not know how we could make sweeping generalisations about ​independent porn.​ How would we even begin to know if a ​scene shot at someone's home includes the kind of prep-work, drugging, and behind the scenes abuse as stereotypical scummy porn agencies​ (which do exist and used to be far more prevalent) ​do. ​Why do we think that this culture is an automatically​ self-generating given whenever sex is recorded? Does an angry misogynistic porn producer jump out the wardrobe when a woman decides to do​ solo content alone? And what, all women are incapable of actually orgasming even alone with a vibrator as soon as she records herself? Women are a monolith like that, are they?

I think this is a stubborn refusal to consider other ways of being, simple as that. For women who vehemently believe it's all 100% "fake", it may even be a defense mechanism probably mixed with a​ ​disdain for male sexuality. They simply have to believe it cannot be enjoyed, the thought​ is too subjectively uncomfortable​, and it validates seeing any man who enjoys it and has a more nuanced view on it​ as a loser, an enemy, even. It's misandry at this point.

​T​here ARE podcasts/blogs/videos/posts where sex workers talk about doing porn/erotic content in a different tone. It is a world that exists. In my opinion, the vibes of these people are not all that unlike from ​folks who like swinger clubs, sex parties, BDSM events with performances on-stage literally watched by people live. (and somehow kink culture is "l​ive and let live" category...). ​Some people even enjoy showing themselves off or feeling hot. It's a thing. It is.

I'm interested in different perspectives.

"​Women are weaker and smaller on average, and they get pregnant, which is a dangerous process for our species. Women are therefore more sexually selective, while men are more eager. This paints the entire heterosexual dating game and explains the pursuer-pursued dynamic."

What would you say to this?

"​Women are weaker and smaller on average, and they get pregnant, which is a dangerous process for our species. Women are therefore more sexually selective, while men are more eager. This paints the entire heterosexual dating game​."

Do you think this explains the pursuer-pursued dynamic?

Spoilers!

So Oz kills Vic. Obviously Oz is an absolute dirty scummy beast, and the ending is gut wrenching. But I disagree with all the folks who say that he was gaslighting the audience ​all along, that this is what he was all along, and that he never cared about Vic and was always going to kill him. I think Oz was a complex character. A twisted freak, but more complex than "just 100% ​evil".

A lot of people seem to forget that ​Oz was essentially as psychologically fucked ​in the ​end as it was probably possible for him ​to be. He was fucked. He was forced to see what he did and his mom's underlying hate, and imo he literally kind of broke. He wasn't just his same old self that he always was, his decisions in the end were not part of some grand rational plan he had all along. His ​world crumbled, and all he could do was to double the hell ​down.

​Until then, he did have a semblance of humanity in him. Heck, he let Vic go in episode 3. His self-image contained some degree of "I'm not a bad guy", except it was all built upon delusions. Because I do like the take that he was delusional, that he buried what he did as a kid, he legitimately made himself​ belive it didn't happen. He never admits to doing it​, he might ​know on some​ subconscious level, ​but imo it's open to interpretation. ​Like, the way he reacts when Sophia makes him face the truth, it legit looked like he was genuine. Like he did not understand.

Either way, he kills Vic *​because* he cared about him. And he can't anymore. It's his moment of no turning back. He is fucked, and he cannot deal with it in any other way than numbing everything out and doubling down on the core of his ​delusion he built, no matter what.

If gender by itself doesn't dichotomize, heterosexuality does. It means "I am one of two categories of human, and I am into the other of the two, which I'm not."

Like, can this be even done without some sort of gender roles? What even would that be like?