u/General_Professor798

I’ve always heard it quoted in movies, shows, etc. I’d like to know y’all’s opinion is on this and what each term means to you!

AITAH for not helping my mother out because of how sexist she is and how much she favors my brother? Now for context, I live in an Arab household and have a brother. My mother usually does the chores around the house such as laundry, dishes, etc. and whenever I can, I try to help her out a little bit by doing the dishes sometimes or just picking up things left randomly in the house. I don’t have any problem with that, my actual problem stems from her relationship with my brother. My brother is basically what you could call a spoiled slob. He never helps around the house, he has NEVER cleaned a dish or done any chores in his life, and he practically gets praised for it.(he’s 18). Whenever my parents go away for trips, I am always expected to be the one tidying up around the house. This has been happening my whole life and whenever I try to express it to my mother, her response is basically “It’s a girls job, girls are the ones who clean the house.” and that boys don’t do that. My mother often asks me to help and I do because 1. I get that she needs help and I’m not opposed to helping her out and also 2. If I don’t she gets angry at me and basically takes away certain privileges like going out with friends, etc. I constantly tell her to ask my brother if I am busy to which she also gets mad at me for, she usually says “stop involving him in this.” She always plays the gender card about how women are supposed to do the housework and men bring the income in, but that doesn’t even remotely apply here because my brother doesn’t help with ANYTHING period. I have honestly had enough of this, my parents are Arab so they have very traditional values and I understand that, but they spoil my brother so much to a point he doesn’t know HOW to wash a dish or do practically anything around the house. (Also my father is almost always gone for work so thats why he isn’t mentioned) Recently every time my mother asks me for help I have told her that if my brother is not required to do the same, why should I.

I have told her so many times how unfair it is that I’m the one who is treated like a servant and I get in trouble for not helping out when it isn’t even expected out of my brother. He is also obviously happy with the situation, so even if I asked him to help me out he would probably just laugh in my face. After every instance she just gets petty and angry like refusing to let me go out with friends,basically just ruining my social life, and just finding any little thing to get mad at. I don’t know if ITAH and should just suck it up and continue helping out while my brother gets to do whatever he wants all day or if I should keep rebelling against her until she gets the point that I deserve to be treated with fairness and that she needs to stop spoiling and babying my brother.

I’ve been honestly struggling with my faith for a while, and the biggest thing on my mind at the moment is the whole moral thing. I recently went to church, which I haven’t done in a while, and the service was honestly going good until the pastor mentioned children being led astray from God’s path and what really got me was he basically—not word for word but still similarly—said, “God’s word states that it would be better to tie a rock to a child’s neck and let them drown then let a child be led astray” Now that’s not what has me questioning my faith but it made me think deeper into it. I just don’t see how someone, all powerful and all knowing while also being all loving can tolerate the hate and evil in this world, and I know many people make the argument of free will but (to my knowledge) it is also stated that God knows our actions and fate before we even commit them, so if he gave us free will but already knows our actions is it not a false sense of freedom and if he already knows that some will end up not being devoted to him, because it is literally impossible to make every single person on earth believe in the same god, how is it not cruel for him to let us be led astray if it will lead us to eternal torture since he knows it is already defined from the start.

I hope that makes sense, I tried to word it the best as I possibly could but somebody please let me know.