Do you have something about you, something true to the way you feel and see the world that genuinely feels more like it is and forever will be yours?

Your perspective? Sound? Touch? Pattern? Way of being? Thinking? Moving? Expressing?

Virginia Woolf reminds me of the power of essence, the power in the signature of a voice and perspective - so true to her in all its gore and bliss (alike), that it continues to connect with people through words alone. My question is not about legacy, but thinking about Virginia just reminded me that not all people, moments, things, require altruism to validate impact. You can be absolutely great at being You, just as you are

Do you have something about you, something true to the way you feel and see the world that genuinely feels more like it is and forever will be yours?

Your perspective? Sound? Touch? Pattern? Way of being? Thinking? Moving? Expressing?

Virginia Woolf reminds me of the power of essence, the power in the signature of a voice and perspective - so true to her in all its gore and bliss (alike), that it continues to connect with people through words alone. My question is not about legacy, but thinking about Virginia just reminded me that not all people, moments, things, require altruism to validate impact. You can be absolutely great at being You, just as you are

Do you have something about you, something true to the way you feel and see the world that genuinely feels more like it is and forever will be yours?

Your perspective? Sound? Touch? Pattern? Way of being? Thinking? Moving? Expressing?

Virginia Woolf reminds me of the power of essence, the power in the signature of a voice and perspective - so true to her in all its gore and bliss (alike), that it continues to connect with people through words alone.

I'm overstimulated as I write this, but my hope is that I can open up a good-feely can of worms here. So much of our lives have a predisposed level of difficulty that can make everything (the true gifts that we are in every facet of the word) feel so heavy to live with. I am obsessed with literature, etymology, language and psychology, but not in any rational sense. I sometimes build up my repertoire for the sole purpose of having a thought make sense on my next walk. Or to build on an answer to a question I have been asking myself since I was 6 years old. I have no profound sense of what my 'purpose' feels, looks, or sounds like - but I've at the very least started to see something that resembles a 'Me' in the ways I write, paint and respond to life lately.

I am no genius, and have run myself amok in the depths of comparison. However, my curiosity has made me a smiling hostage to the questions of whether and how you on the other end of this glowing screen experience your most unique self through the traces of what you feel, do and say

(this is equally as open to advice as it is a discussion circulating the two bolded questions)

‘Psychology is where the artist goes to die’ - I had come across this hyperbolic quote and was immediately curious. For the life of me I cannot remember the source, so forgive me, but allow me to (briefly) dive into the perspective and why it piqued my interest. This may not do it justice, but alas:

In my immediate environment, as well as its larger context, psychology as a discipline and field has more social girth and merit than music, the arts, writing and creative fields in general. The underlying current between the artist and the psychologist is the sensitive person (archetypally); sensitivity is put to work in different forms here.

The psychologist, in attuning, listening, connecting, guiding - whether that be on an organisational level, scholarly level, or personal level.

And the artist, in attuning, listening, connecting, creating - whether that be with others, form, sound, space, light.

Not all artists create and not all psychologists guide through their careers. But psychology is often held in higher regard due to measurable problem-solving. 

1.) Why do many truly creative colourful people find themselves in the substrata of introspective disciplines?

This is not a generalised judgement, or an insinuation that the sciences and mathematic disciplines do not appeal to sensitive individuals, rather a query posed to explore motif.

TL;DR
To reflect: My interests are many. And I had recently come to a more complete decision to study psychology, specifically the clinical route to allow for furthered practice in depth-psychology and one day psychoanalysis - inspired deeply by my personal life experience and a resonance with the works of Marie-Louise von Franz. I aimed to study massage and somatics in my own time, and bridge these psychosomatic foundations with my longer term goal of studying ethnobotany and zoology. It is all a bit much to think about, because none of it has the formal outline (or even an inkling of a clue) for what my actual career might look like. Let alone my capacity. It is a lengthy, and quite frankly intimidating long term aim that has the potential to be deeply rewarding.

I have a heightened curiosity surrounding this (artist v psychologist) because of an envy that has surfaced the further into my twenties I am. I grew up loving nature, animals, bugs, crafts, was talented at art and drama. I have age mates who went to art schools and now create events, spaces, artworks and music that I am excited to see, but equally, drive me to reflect upon and question my own choices. We all know how deeply human it is to envy. Reflecting on what it meant personally and potentially professionally (future career may be unconventional) has been a rocky road.

2.) Has anyone had any experience in having multiple passions that extend beyond the discipline and found ways to bridge these in honest and coherent ways?

(this is equally as open to advice as it is a discussion circulating the two bolded questions)

‘Psychology is where the artist goes to die’ - I had come across this hyperbolic quote and was immediately curious. For the life of me I cannot remember the source, so forgive me, but allow me to (briefly) dive into the perspective and why it piqued my interest. This may not do it justice, but alas:

In my immediate environment, as well as its larger context, psychology as a discipline and field has more social girth and merit than music, the arts, writing and creative fields in general. The underlying current between the artist and the psychologist is the sensitive person (archetypally); sensitivity is put to work in different forms here.

The psychologist, in attuning, listening, connecting, guiding - whether that be on an organisational level, scholarly level, or personal level.

And the artist, in attuning, listening, connecting, creating - whether that be with others, form, sound, space, light.

Not all artists create and not all psychologists guide through their careers. But psychology is often held in higher regard due to measurable problem-solving. 

1.) Why do many truly creative colourful people find themselves in the substrata of introspective disciplines?

This is not a generalised judgement, or an insinuation that the sciences and mathematic disciplines do not appeal to sensitive individuals, rather a query posed to explore motif.

TL;DR
To reflect: My interests are many. And I had recently come to a more complete decision to study psychology, specifically the clinical route to allow for furthered practice in depth-psychology and one day psychoanalysis - inspired deeply by my personal life experience and a resonance with the works of Marie-Louise von Franz. I aimed to study massage and somatics in my own time, and bridge these psychosomatic foundations with my longer term goal of studying ethnobotany and zoology. It is all a bit much to think about, because none of it has the formal outline (or even an inkling of a clue) for what my actual career might look like. Let alone my capacity. It is a lengthy, and quite frankly intimidating long term aim that has the potential to be deeply rewarding.

I have a heightened curiosity surrounding this (artist v psychologist) because of an envy that has surfaced the further into my twenties I am. I grew up loving nature, animals, bugs, crafts, was talented at art and drama. I have age mates who went to art schools and now create events, spaces, artworks and music that I am excited to see, but equally, drive me to reflect upon and question my own choices. We all know how deeply human it is to envy. Reflecting on what it meant personally and potentially professionally (future career may be unconventional) has been a rocky road.

2.) Has anyone had any experience in having multiple passions that extend beyond the discipline and found ways to bridge these in honest and coherent ways?

(this is equally as open to advice as it is a discussion circulating the two bolded questions)

I had come across the hyperbolic titled quote and was immediately curious. For the life of me I cannot remember the source, so forgive me, but allow me to (briefly) dive into the perspective and why it piqued my interest. This may not do it justice, but alas:

In my immediate environment, as well as its larger context, psychology as a discipline and field has more social girth and merit than music, the arts, writing and creative fields in general. The underlying current between the artist and the psychologist is the sensitive person (archetypally); sensitivity is put to work in different forms here.

The psychologist, in attuning, listening, connecting, guiding - whether that be on an organisational level, scholarly level, or personal level.

And the artist, in attuning, listening, connecting, creating - whether that be with others, form, sound, space, light.

Not all artists create and not all psychologists guide through their careers. But psychology is often held in higher regard due to measurable problem-solving. 1.) Do many truly creative colourful people find themselves in the substrata of introspective disciplines?

This is not a generalised judgement, or an insinuation that the sciences and mathematic disciplines do not appeal to sensitive individuals, rather a query posed to explore motif.

TL;DR
To reflect: My interests are many. And I had recently come to a more complete decision to study psychology, specifically the clinical route to allow for furthered practice in depth-psychology and one day psychoanalysis - inspired deeply by my personal life experience and a resonance with the works of Marie-Louise von Franz. I aimed to study massage and somatics in my own time, and bridge these psychosomatic foundations with my longer term goal of studying ethnobotany and zoology. It is all a bit much to think about, because none of it has the formal outline (or even an inkling of a clue) for what my actual career might look like. Let alone my capacity. It is a lengthy, and quite frankly intimidating long term aim that has the potential to be deeply rewarding.

I have a heightened curiosity surrounding this (artist v psychologist) because of an envy that has surfaced the further into my twenties I am. I grew up loving nature, animals, bugs, crafts, was talented at art and drama. I have age mates who went to art schools and now create events, spaces, artworks and music that I am excited to see, but equally, drive me to reflect upon and question my own choices. We all know how deeply human it is to envy. Reflecting on what it meant personally and potentially professionally (future career may be unconventional) has been a rocky road.

2.) Has anyone had any experience in having multiple passions that extend beyond the discipline and found ways to bridge these in honest and coherent ways?

My iPhone will turn completely off, 4-5 times in a row. It does this at random times in the mornings and evenings. Does anyone here know what could be going on?

*Edited for clarity: it will turn itself off and then back on over and over again. I will be busy on my phone, the screen goes black. Then the white apple sign of the phone turning on will pop up. I will unlock my phone and it will turn straight off again. Repeats 4, 5, 6 times in a row. This happens many times in a day

Have you experienced a shift in your internal relationship and perception towards foods and substances?

Not just physical, but mental too — online intake and discourse, a general gentleness and openness? Emotionally less static or conflicted?

I’ve been microdosing (50-100mg) GT with recommended doses of saffron, lions mane and some Reishi in tea. And I mini-dose every second or third week (300-400mg soaked in lemon juice).

I was vegetarian from the age of 12 until 20. After that I ate meat on and off for 4 years. The tolerance for it was only there because of the high stress I experienced from being in the working world and drinking daily (alcohol) - it buffered my morale and interoception.

I’m now 24 and have had a hell of a journey dealing with my addictive relationship with food and alcohol.

I had given up all hope in my addictions and perpetual state of overwhelm, until choosing to hail-Mary my way into sticking to a microdosing routine. I’m not out of the woods, not in the slightest, but there have been some shifts in my perception.

For starters, I don’t drink alcohol or eat meat anymore. It is a physical impossibility.

Two months worth of microdosing has completely changed my sense of satiation, fullness, taste and preference when it comes to food. Meat and any excrements of animals (except for eggs for some reason) are a very loud internal NO for my body. It’s hard to explain, because it’s not even a feeling, it’s a full-on rejection. Without thought or judgement. The same way your body just knows not to consume petrol or hydrochloric acid.

I have the same full-body (loud and internal) NO towards alcohol. Also, not a feeling, just a flat out rejection of the substance. It’s not disgust, it’s not anger, it’s not shame… in fact it’s not fuelled by any meaning or emotion whatsoever. Just (and I cannot emphasise this enough) a neutral knowing.

For someone who has struggled with addiction and had no reference for a healthy, balanced understanding of my body’s cues - this has felt like the kiss of an angel

I’ve knowingly still neglected the larger part of embodied action in my life — but I’ve had this greater sense of “there is no rush”. The more I’ve taken each day at the pace of my own capacity, the more of me there is to have the space to feel the day, be present, make true choices. So far.

I hope I can conclude this thread with something that makes more sense — something true to me, more hopeful and loving — by the end of this year. Otherwise, the path is yet to come