Am I (19F) being delusional about the most romantic interaction I had with the guy of my dreams? (19M)
This happened a few months ago but I’m still overthinking and trying to figure out what happened
I was visiting my home town during the holidays and i met this guy who was on his gap year at my home city for two months. We met through a very movie-like la la land romcom way at a bar a few times and long story short we hung out a few times afterwards. He was shy at first and was a really kind and sweet person, he had a meek and gentle way about him, which is exactly my type
I couldn’t tell if we were hanging out romantically or platonically, because it felt like he was just treating me as a friend to show him around the city. (He so perfectly my type and we had amazing chemistry, romantic or otherwise) On the second night, after countless very cute interactions where it started to feel romantic, I hinted at a kiss and he leant in. It was kind of bad but he apologised for this being his first kiss. (Aww so cute I genuinely loved this for him) I hadn’t felt this alive and with anyone ever, we had an amazing rest of the night, and we decided to meet again the next day
The next day, he didn’t have the enthusiasm he had before. He said he didn’t get much sleep and was exhausted because we had stayed out late the previous night. He still made an effort in conversations but I kept fumbling my words and stuff I was saying because I was thrown off by the difference in our energy.
The more we talked the more I liked him. He was emotionally intelligent, his outlook on life was similar to mine, and had an eagerness for the life that lays ahead of us. We still had insanely deep conversations about our futures, life, hopes and dreams. Which made me think he could be thinking of this more than just a fling. He didn’t seem experienced romantically which would explain the initial nervousness, and the way he talked about his perspective on life made me think that he’s not that kind of person. He’s kind of from near where I go to uni so I thought it could work if we really wanted it to
The place we had planned to go to was shut, and I suggested taking a walk around but he said he was exhausted so we cut the night short. Thinking I’d see him again (before I left for uni in two days)
When it came to saying goodbye, he said ‘thank you for everything and good luck with uni’. I was so shocked at the sudden permanent goodbye I visibly looked upset and said that I didn’t understand. He proceeded to say that ‘places would be shut for another day or two,’ and that he ‘wouldn’t see me again after I left’ but then he offered to see me again ‘if I wanted to’. I thought he only said it to make me feel better and I didn’t want to be that person that clings onto things that aren’t gonna happen, so I declined and pulled myself back to say goodbye. We kissed, and afterwards, he apologised as I walked away.
I later texted him on ig to thank him for the time we had, and he texted back warmly and that was that.
After all these months I still think about him and torture myself wondering if he ever really liked me or if I was being delusional. Because it was probably his first romantic encounter he was probably confused and conflicted as well?
Some of my friends said he must have liked me lots to have offered to see me again and have encouraged me to text him. I know it wouldn’t make a difference because I don’t know where either of us would be in a few months, and if he liked me that much in the first place.
I’d really like to get your opinions of how he was feeling then. Was a reading into it too deeply?