I am tired communicating. I choose myself this time.
Thank you for letting me be when I said I needed some space, maybe for a month. I was so overwhelmed with the ongoing training for additional work in my corporate job and a very demanding side hustle (yet fulfilling).
You said, maybe I should try two or three weeks instead. I haven’t noticed that it has been two weeks already. Why? Idk. Maybe I’ve just been enjoying my own company. I got to take care of myself more.
Our dynamics really go well. Our communication is without a doubt. It’s so sad that even though we communicate all the time about our issues, concerns, and struggles, I am still here struggling with how to say that I want to be on my own moving forward.
Maybe I got tired of communicating my concerns with no actions afterwards. Maybe I am still in the moment when you forgot our first anniversary, even though we are each other’s first. Maybe I still remember the time when I said I didn't feel your love that much, but you always said that you have your own ways of showing love. Maybe I got tired of saying a thing before you act, then saying, “makiramdam ka naman” and you saying “I’d be better.” Or maybe I’m just too petty when I pointed out the time you chose to finish your food alone without offering me even a single piece of fries. Hehe.
I think I need to choose myself this time. Thank you for those five beautiful years.