u/Hot_Fish5368

Second semester of nursing school officially kicks off Monday August 24th. This week the lab is open to get some practice and refresh on clinical skills etc but I am feeling SO UNMOTIVATED. I spend so much time dreading and thinking about starting to study and do absolutely nothing about it 😩 I don’t have any classmates I’d consider friends yet so maybe developing those friendships this semester will help this but I feel so useless and lazy and unable to lock in. I literally cleaned the entire house today instead of going over dosage problems, head to toe, literally anything school related. Summer break was 3 months long maybe I let myself have too much fun. I cannot continue this way I have pharm this semester!!!

Someone please tell me they’ve felt this way!!! How did you snap out of it? Any advice is appreciated I’m down bad :(

Back in 2023 I had an abortion. I got pregnant by a guy that was not my boyfriend, but the experience was very hard for me nonetheless. My life changed in so many ways after this. Fast forward to now, I’ve been with my boyfriend (whole different guy) for a year and 3 months, and we were in the talking stage for a year prior to making it official. I’ve had 2 abortions with him, one was a true abortion one was a miscarriage. I’ve had a deep fear about being connected with someone forever out of obligation and not desire, I was just not ready to have a baby and have gotten on birth control since. With my first abortion I saved the ultrasound photos, the pregnancy tests and bought a ring that had the baby’s birthstone. This signified the love I undeniably felt for this baby even though I could not follow through with the pregnancy. I did not have any keepsakes to remember the two abortions that I had later on with boyfriend because he told me he wanted to leave those memories behind and did not want to hold onto it since we made our decisions. I understood and respected those wishes. Today he brought up that he does not want me to keep the ring from my first abortion anymore- he wants me to get rid of it completely. I still wear it everyday, but I told him that I won’t wear it anymore but I don’t want to get rid of it. That’s a part of me that still holds so much love, pain, and also the transitions of life I went through. It means a lot to me.

Am I wrong for not wanting to part with the ring?