u/I_Swear_Not_Bot

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Author’s note: WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT’S BEEN 2 MONTHS?????

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Previous Chapter

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Goemon and Hermes continued dancing with their blades. The god had gotten past the initial shock of his stolen technique, and the two were now mostly evenly matched.

“You fight well, oh god of speed! But can you deal with this?”

The ninja boasted, forgetting, or perhaps ignoring, that his opponent was unable to hear him. He readied his sword, and cut along a straight line, striking his opponent’s eyes, and stealing his vision. Simultaneously, however, the god managed to strike Goemon’s ear, stealing his own hearing back, but could do no more before his opponent ran off again.

“What a bother, this ninja.”

Hermes picked himself up, annoyed, yet still unable to hide his smirk.

“You humans are proving to be very, very interesting.”

He put his hand inside his own vest, and from an inside pocket, took out a golden rod, where curled around it were two equally golden, unmoving snakes, each one having a single wing attached to their backs. Holding the rod in front of his mouth like a microphone, he spoke with authority:

“Caduceus, I command you, search and be my guide.”

Suddenly, as if it was magic, the golden snakes springed to life. The golden skin cracked and fell, showcasing the green scales below as they started moving. They slithered off from the staff, and as one climbed onto the hands, then arms, and then shoulders, of Hermes, the other guided them forwards through the castle corridors.

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3 minutes had passed.

3 minutes of walking.

3 minutes of searching.

And yet, Hermes had found nothing.

But something had found him.

He received a signal from the reptile perched upon his shoulder, and managed to parry a blade coming from south-southwest.

“Nice try, thief, but it seems your advantage has made you sloppy.”

The god held the Caduceus in front of him like a microphone, and spoke:

“Caduceus, I command you, be the weapon by my side”

The snakes seemed to hear him, as they flew around the deity, orbiting Hermes like planets would orbit a star.

“Now, let’s do this properly, shall we?”

The deity took again a fighting stance, this time closer to that appropriate for a rapier, as the twin snakes circled around him.

“You’ve finally begun talking my language, oh god of speed!”

Goemon, too, took a fighting stance, ready for the battle to truly begin.

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“Finally, we’ll get to see some action!”

Robin Hood was, very noticeably, bored. He was not alone, although a few around him were a bit more optimistic. Nezumi Kozō was one of those few.

“You better not sleep now, Hood. Ishikawa’s techniques should be an honor to see firsthand.”

“I’ve heard of that, yes. What was his tale, again? Born to a samurai family, his parents were killed and he swore revenge?”

“No, I do not believe that to be the case. I was under the impression his story was a tad different. Born in the Kawachi Province, moving to the Kansai Region later on in his life, where he led a band of thieves.”

“Both of you are wrong.”

All looked towards the owner of that voice. He seemed japanese, with dark brown hair fashioned in a short ponytail. He wore a dark blue kimono and light blue hakama, and had a katana tied to his side via a white ribbon.

“And who might you be?” Hood asked, equal parts confused and impressed.

“A friend of Goemon’s, although just postmortem. Unfortunately, I never met the guy in life! Kya-ha-ha!”

The stranger laughed a strange laugh, yet those around him remained uneasy.

“Oop, sorry for my manners. I’m Sakamoto Ryoma, the Revolutionary!”

He extended his hand, which Hood took.

“Now, could you elaborate on our incorrectness, mate?”

“Ah, well, it’s not really that you two are wrong, really…” Ryoma paused, thinking with himself, before continuing. “It’s more a question of respect, y’know?”

“And what makes you say that?” Kozō asked, curiously.

“Well, I don’t think a man like him should be tied down to any one story, is all.” He continued, explaining: “I’m sure you all know this, but whenever someone asks about his past, he laughs, and tells a different story every time. Think it’s part of the fun.”

The others thought for a few seconds, before those thoughts were again interrupted by Ryoma.

“Ah, but don’t worry too much about it! We have a fight to watch, after all!”

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The two combatants resumed dancing with their blades. Although the god could hardly get a hit in, neither could Goemon. Anytime he got close, one of the snakes would intercept him, either taking the hit, or redirecting it.

“These reptiles are beginning to bother me a good bit, you know! Although…”

Goemon disengaged, retreating a few steps back. He watched as Hermes recomposed and once again took his stance, the twin snakes perching on his shoulders.

“What if I were to…” The thief remained thinking to himself, muttering: “Yes, yes… that might work…”

Suddenly, the ninja began running towards the god. But as he approached, he jumped to the side, running on the corridor’s walls. He cut along a portion of the screen he ran across, which seemed to trigger a trap, as ropes extended from the ceiling, towards Goemon. The ninja, however, threw them in the direction of the god. The projectiles, however, were intercepted by the twin snakes, who were caught in Hermes’ stead.

Goemon then jumped from the wall to the god of speed, aiming for his face. The target, however, was not simply standing still. Instead, Hermes was analyzing, relying on senses other than sight. And right now, the Ninja had not been very quiet.

“Got you!”

Both said the same words at the same time, and although Hermes had his right eye split open, Goemon had not come out unscathed, as the same could be said about his left. A fog came out of both wounds, moving to the other side, as both combatants had simultaneously lost and gained a sense. Both could only see out of one eye, as they stood only meters from each other, the tied reptiles between them. The two, previously well composed, were now maniacally laughing, barely able to breathe. Managing to calm down, Goemon said, almost involuntarily:

“Fighting you is more exciting than I thought, god!”

“I could say the same!”

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“Oho! It’s been a while since I’ve seen Hermes so excited!”

Zeus and Ares were watching the fight, though the older one seemed much calmer about the situation.

“Now that you mention it, that’s true! It’s been a while since I’ve seen him slip out of his calm facade.”

“I missed that side of him. We used to give him another name when in this state, you know? Outside of battle, he’s a very composed god, but fighting, he liked to take the name of…”

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GIGANTOMACHY

“Circle him! He won’t be-”

The divine soldier was interrupted by his body being crushed beneath an enormous hand, as the many eyed giant, Argos, fought against the army invading his cave, all 100 of his eyes, spread throughout his body watching carefully.

“You lot are starting to bore me, you know. Don’t you have anyone who’s strong enough to face me?”

“Well, if you insist…”

Hermes, god of speed, suddenly appeared on the entrance to the being’s lair, sword drawn.

“And who might you be, little one?”

“A dead man has no use for names.”

“I like your attitude. Dodge.”

The giant threw his fist towards the god, who jumped to dodge it, and advanced, walking over the member, and slicing beneath him, making many cuts, although only surface deep.

“Well, that tickles a bit-”

A black fog surrounded his arm, as all the eyes there present lost their color, and their sight, interrupting the enormous being’s speech. The mist then traveled the air, reaching the deity close by.

“What the-”

“Ahh, the sweet feeling of a guaranteed victory! Those eyes you were so proud of now no longer work! And in fact, my vision does seem a lot better…”

“Don’t get cocky, you-”

The giant was again interrupted, Hermes now appearing directly by his side.

“I could say the same to you! Now, try to last a little longer!”

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“Brother… Hermes?”

Ares slowly entered the cave, the sound of laughter getting louder and louder, as he saw the result of the battle that had occurred.

Hermes stood there, laughing, blood that was not his own smeared on every part of his body. Below him, lay the no-eyed corpse of the many-eyed giant.

Or at least, it seemed like a corpse.

For it still had air for one last, dying question.

“I must know… what is the name… of the one who bested me?”

“As I've said, you have no use for it… But since you insist, may the one who defeated you go down in history as…”

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“Mercury.”

Ares quivered.

“I still have nightmares about that battle.”

Zeus laughed, amused by the memories of bloodshed.

“After that, we received complaints from the common folk about his mania for battle. We wanted him to ignore it, but instead, he took it to heart. Took a vow to never give himself away to the thrills of battle, started acting exclusively as the servant of the gods.”

Zeus seemed to think a little, before continuing.

“But now, he seems to have finally loosened up again.”

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“Well, dear Hermes, I believe there is only one thing to do in this situation.”

Goemon covered his blind eye with his left hand, and with his sword, pointed at the twin snakes, tied up and struggling for freedom.

“Surely, you don’t mean…”

“What else could I mean?”

Hermes stared incredulously at his opponent, before smiling.

“Very well.”

Both combatants rushed down the corridor, striking at the same time, though neither of them was hit.

Instead, the only victims were the poor reptiles, who had their singular wings cut off from them. A black fog surrounded them and moved through the air, towards both of the attackers, each left with a large wing on opposing sides of their backs. Immediately afterwards, the combatants jumped, flying through ceiling after ceiling after ceiling, and finally emerging from the castle’s roof, illuminated by the light of the moon.

“Incredible, folks!”

Heimdall held onto a rope, which was tied to a balloon, watching over the fighters and the audience alike.

“It seems that our fighters have taken to air!”

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Afterword: I tried to 'reconcile' Hermes' portrayal between Shuumatsu and Apocalypse with the whole "Mercury" thing. Anyways, this has been the long awaited fifth chapter. See you for the next one in two more months.

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