u/IiI_buddy

Im a 19f and I’ve been losing weight for the past year. at first it was intentional weight loss because I was overweight >!5’3 and!< >!188lb!< and I wanted to lose weight before college. So I started to workout and I was really under-eating thinking it would be fine once I got to my goal and I would eat normally. now I weigh >!90lbs!< and I can’t stop. I have lost my period and it’s been gone for the past 5 months and I recently went to the doctors and kinda explained but didn’t fully open up about what I’m going through. The doctor was concerned about my weight loss and the chest pain I was having and ordered a bunch of tests and all my labs are coming back and I’m pretty malnourished.

People around me are starting to notice and comment how I look sick, and I don’t even like how I look at such a low weight but there’s a mental block that won’t let me eat more. I kinda told my mom a week ago how I’m feeling but didn’t put a name to what I know this is, and she’s been trying to help me by planning out what I eat so I don’t count calories. but I keep not following the plan which I know is stupid but I feel I like I’m eating too much or if I eat then I will gain weight really fast and be back were I was, even though I want to get better.

Ik it’s not good if I keep losing weight but I don’t know how to get over the mental block I’m having. like I don’t have motivation to eat and I’ve been trying to limit exercise to just 3 times a week but I’m even failing at that because I feel like since I’m eating more now I have to not be sedentary.
I also feel like I’m kinda burdening my mom because shes trying to help and keeps urging me to eat more and I keep falling back into the same habits and I’m still losing more weight.

Can anyone give me any advice please or their experience?