u/Imaginary-Winner-335

Hello!!

I am due in a couple days with our first and my husband snores like a chainsaw. I apparently snore too!! 😭😂

Has anyone been a snorlax around their newborn? Does it bother them or is it like a natural sound machine?

EDIT: Thank you for the helpful advice!! We have a white noise machine and I will talk with my husband about his snoring. Most of the men in my family use a CPAP and I know his dad snores but doesn’t use a CPAP. I plan to keep noise going (TV, vacuuming, etc) when baby sleeps but at night it will probably be quieter when WE sleep - or try to.

Hi! I plan on an unmedicated hospital birth. I have not been doing the perineal massage because I wasn’t quite sure on how to do it and 40 weeks flew by. I tried a bit in the shower today and oh my lord it buuurns. I want to go unmedicated but after a bad OB appointment today my doctor left me with a lot of anxiety. She gave me a hard time for declining an epidural and told me all the bad things that I would be going through without it. (The office swaps the doctor/midwife you see each appointment - I have not seen this person at all except for last week and today)

Any advice to help would be appreciated or even good vibe stories. I have received a bunch or backlash for sharing I wanted to go unmedicated to friends/family and this specific OB. All of the other medical professionals in the office were super supportive of my choice except the one I have seen the past two appointments. I have never been this anxious the entire pregnancy and my due date is in a couple days now.

I am currently 38w and 5 days FTM. I just want to rant about my most recent OB appointment.

I had an appointment today at my OB office and we got to the office 15 minutes early but weren’t seen until almost 50 minutes past our scheduled appointment time. When we had been waiting for at least 30 minutes we heard a nurse outside tell the doctor on shift that we were ready for her in our room, she said okay and still took 20 minutes to start the appointment. I understand things happen, and it sounded like someone had a small emergency, but a check in from a nurse saying they are behind would have been nice. I was not angry to wait, just wish I was checked in on and told they were running behind. My husband and I sat for almost an hour confused and a bit worried they forgot we were there.

When the OB comes into the room, she introduced herself to me but completely ignored my husband sitting next to me. The office I go to rotates doctors/midwives each appointment because they rotate at the hospital - so that way anyone can help out when its time to deliver and the parents know the doctor even if meeting just once. This was our first time with this doctor because in the past she kept canceling appointments or calling out so we’d see someone else.

While going through the motions, she took the baby’s heartbeat but didn’t measure me at all like every other doctor did. She also never told me the baby’s heartbeat and when asked said it was sounding fine. She then asked me if I had taken any birthing classes, when I told her no she made a face at me and asked me why not. I mentioned timing and financials for them didn’t work out and she makes another face almost like she wanted to roll her eyes. I mentioned I am the aunt of almost a dozen kiddos and a few friends of mine have given birth in the past month so I have been able to ask my friends/family about their birth experiences and for advice - especially the ones who had kids a couple years ago. She sarcastically responds saying “Oh so you have talked to those who are professionals then” and it felt really shady.

She asked who is going to be in the delivery room to “coach” me through my labor. I said just my husband and the hospital staff, I didn’t have anyone else lined up. She again made a face and sighed.

After that she asked if I was planning on breastfeeding and I said I was and she asked if I took those classes. I said I had not for the same reason and she rolled her eyes. She asked me if I even looked through my folder… I never received a folder. I told her that and she gave me one with a bunch of information I never received and was supposed to at 34 weeks. She pulled out flyers for classes she thought I should have taken and when she got to the feeding class flyer she said it wasn’t much use to me anymore since I was already about to give birth. Another jab.

Maybe I was just grumpy from waiting 50 minutes, from her not greeting my husband like each other doctor had, from her comments, or the eye rolls. I just really don’t like this OB and I hope she isn’t who I am put with for delivery.

TLDR: My OB was a jerk today.

I found out today at work that I am only permitted 6 weeks of unpaid maternity leave starting the day I give birth. I was surprised at the time frame, I thought I’d get at least 8 weeks.

I am not really comfortable putting my six week old in daycare. I’d like my kid to have his vaccines before looking for childcare… but I honestly want to stay home if they are only giving me 6 weeks.

6 weeks after his birth date I will be on the schedule and if I am not there when I am back on the schedule I will lose my job. This got me thinking, what is the average timeframe most parents get for leave?

EDIT: I do not qualify for FMLA and I do not have PTO due to not being with the company long enough (less than 12 months) and I am due next month. I am on Medicaid because my company does not provide insurance. I am in VA and state mandated protections don’t start until 2028.