u/Important-Gur-3322

I’ve made all the necessary preparations to leave my home country and move to the UK. I quit my job, started learning a technical skill related to the work I planned to do in the UK, and exchanged all my money for British pounds. And I transferred part of it to Hong Kong because I needed it to apply for a spousal visa in six months. I was also preparing for an English exam and went to Hong Kong last month to book our wedding for July. I paid for all these expenses myself because I never asked him for money. I’ve already bought a wedding dress for $463, I’ve paid for everything myself.

Then disaster struck. We had a fight last week, and he didn’t contact me for a whole week. When I reached out to him, I said a lot and explained a lot, but he suddenly seemed like a different person. He read all my messages but didn’t reply, then became cold and distant, said he wanted to break up, and started berating me. I was furious and devastated. So I told him, “Fine, then pay me back for all these expenses.” Then he started losing his mind—refusing to pay, refusing to split the bill, and even accusing me of blackmailing him in the end. Yesterday I sent him numerous messages, he didn’t reply. And today he just said a few meaningless things, claiming he didn’t want to deal with me today, and then blocked me. He blocked me on WhatsApp, Facebook, and WeChat. This isn’t like him at all; I could tell just by my gut feeling that he couldn’t even be bothered to talk to me. Especially since we were about to get married, I confronted him and asked if he was seeing other women. At first, he admitted he’d met up with other women, but later he denied it. My emotional journey went like this: First, I went crazy, grilling him and yelling at him. Then I calmed down a bit and told him I really didn’t want to fight with him—I didn’t mean to say those harsh things—so I hoped he could understand. But he flatly refused to agree and insisted on breaking up. I just feel that for someone to change so drastically, the only possibility is that he’s fallen for someone else and is dating someone else. Maybe that’s it; I don’t know. So later, he agreed to pay only for my flight to Hong Kong. As for the wedding dress I’d bought, he refused to cover it, and he wouldn’t compensate me for the losses I incurred from exchanging my money into pounds either.

In the end, I didn’t want to argue with him anymore. I just asked him to pay me for the flight and the 305 HKD for the marriage registration in Hong Kong, and let’s just end this. I made so many, many efforts and so many changes for him, but all he did was go back to the UK, find a job, and keep saying that this job was for me—because of the spouse visa. But he’d only been at this job for less than two months when he went crazy because he couldn’t handle the pressure of the job; he didn’t want to do it. Yet he kept saying that this job was for me, shifting the blame onto me. I don’t know—maybe this argument was just the perfect excuse for him to break up with me, since he didn’t want to do that job anymore either. He must have felt instantly relieved of all pressure.

My life has been ruined by someone like this, because we’re supposed to get married in less than two months. My family and friends all know about this. I feel utterly humiliated. All my plans have been thrown into disarray, my life has been turned upside down, and I should have been fully prepared and ready to move to the UK. Is there anyone in the UK who wants to get married? Are there any single men between the ages of 30 and 40?

TL;DR: we had planned to get married in two months. I had already made all the preparations to immigrate to the UK and live with him, but after a fight last week, he completely changed. His attitude turned so hostile that I didn’t recognize him anymore. I feel incredibly discouraged and frustrated.

I’ve made all the necessary preparations to leave my home country and move to the UK. I quit my job, started learning a technical skill related to the work I planned to do in the UK, and exchanged all my money for British pounds. And I transferred part of it to Hong Kong because I needed it to apply for a spousal visa in six months. I was also preparing for an English exam and went to Hong Kong last month to book our wedding for July. I paid for all these expenses myself because I never asked him for money. I’ve already bought a wedding dress for $463, I’ve paid for everything myself.

Then disaster struck. We had a fight last week, and he didn’t contact me for a whole week. When I reached out to him, I said a lot and explained a lot, but he suddenly seemed like a different person. He read all my messages but didn’t reply, then became cold and distant, said he wanted to break up, and started berating me. I was furious and devastated. So I told him, “Fine, then pay me back for all these expenses.” Then he started losing his mind—refusing to pay, refusing to split the bill, and even accusing me of blackmailing him in the end. Yesterday I sent him numerous messages, he didn’t reply. And today he just said a few meaningless things, claiming he didn’t want to deal with me today, and then blocked me. He blocked me on WhatsApp, Facebook, and WeChat. This isn’t like him at all; I could tell just by my gut feeling that he couldn’t even be bothered to talk to me. Especially since we were about to get married, I confronted him and asked if he was seeing other women. At first, he admitted he’d met up with other women, but later he denied it. My emotional journey went like this: First, I went crazy, grilling him and yelling at him. Then I calmed down a bit and told him I really didn’t want to fight with him—I didn’t mean to say those harsh things—so I hoped he could understand. But he flatly refused to agree and insisted on breaking up. I just feel that for someone to change so drastically, the only possibility is that he’s fallen for someone else and is dating someone else. Maybe that’s it; I don’t know. So later, he agreed to pay only for my flight to Hong Kong. As for the wedding dress I’d bought, he refused to cover it, and he wouldn’t compensate me for the losses I incurred from exchanging my money into pounds either.

In the end, I didn’t want to argue with him anymore. I just asked him to pay me for the flight and the 305 HKD for the marriage registration in Hong Kong, and let’s just end this. I made so many, many efforts and so many changes for him, but all he did was go back to the UK, find a job, and keep saying that this job was for me—because of the spouse visa. But he’d only been at this job for less than two months when he went crazy because he couldn’t handle the pressure of the job; he didn’t want to do it. Yet he kept saying that this job was for me, shifting the blame onto me. I don’t know—maybe this argument was just the perfect excuse for him to break up with me, since he didn’t want to do that job anymore either. He must have felt instantly relieved of all pressure.

My life has been ruined by someone like this, because we’re supposed to get married in less than two months. My family and friends all know about this. I feel utterly humiliated. All my plans have been thrown into disarray, my life has been turned upside down, and I should have been fully prepared and ready to move to the UK. Is there anyone in the UK who wants to get married? Are there any single men between the ages of 30 and 40?

TL;DR: we had planned to get married in two months. I had already made all the preparations to immigrate to the UK and live with him, but after a fight last week, he completely changed. He insisted on breaking up, and his attitude turned so hostile that I didn’t recognize him anymore. I feel incredibly discouraged and frustrated.

I’ve made all the necessary preparations to leave my home country and move to the UK. I quit my job, started learning a technical skill related to the work I planned to do in the UK, and exchanged all my money for British pounds. And I transferred part of it to Hong Kong because I needed it to apply for a spousal visa in six months. I was also preparing for an English exam and went to Hong Kong last month to book our wedding for July. I paid for all these expenses myself because I never asked him for money. I’ve already bought a wedding dress for $463, I’ve paid for everything myself.

Then disaster struck. We had a fight last week, and he didn’t contact me for a whole week. When I reached out to him, I said a lot and explained a lot, but he suddenly seemed like a different person. He read all my messages but didn’t reply, then became cold and distant, said he wanted to break up, and started berating me. I was furious and devastated. So I told him, “Fine, then pay me back for all these expenses.” Then he started losing his mind—refusing to pay, refusing to split the bill, and even accusing me of blackmailing him in the end. Yesterday I sent him numerous messages, he didn’t reply. And today he just said a few meaningless things, claiming he didn’t want to deal with me today, and then blocked me. He blocked me on WhatsApp, Facebook, and WeChat. This isn’t like him at all; I could tell just by my gut feeling that he couldn’t even be bothered to talk to me. Especially since we were about to get married, I confronted him and asked if he was seeing other women. At first, he admitted he’d met up with other women, but later he denied it. My emotional journey went like this: First, I went crazy, grilling him and yelling at him. Then I calmed down a bit and told him I really didn’t want to fight with him—I didn’t mean to say those harsh things—so I hoped he could understand. But he flatly refused to agree and insisted on breaking up. I just feel that for someone to change so drastically, the only possibility is that he’s fallen for someone else and is dating someone else. Maybe that’s it; I don’t know. So later, he agreed to pay only for my flight to Hong Kong. As for the wedding dress I’d bought, he refused to cover it, and he wouldn’t compensate me for the losses I incurred from exchanging my money into pounds either.

In the end, I didn’t want to argue with him anymore. I just asked him to pay me for the flight and the 305 HKD for the marriage registration in Hong Kong, and let’s just end this. I made so many, many efforts and so many changes for him, but all he did was go back to the UK, find a job, and keep saying that this job was for me—because of the spouse visa. But he’d only been at this job for less than two months when he went crazy because he couldn’t handle the pressure of the job; he didn’t want to do it. Yet he kept saying that this job was for me, shifting the blame onto me. I don’t know—maybe this argument was just the perfect excuse for him to break up with me, since he didn’t want to do that job anymore either. He must have felt instantly relieved of all pressure.

My life has been ruined by someone like this, because we’re supposed to get married in less than two months. My family and friends all know about this. I feel utterly humiliated. All my plans have been thrown into disarray, my life has been turned upside down, and I should have been fully prepared and ready to move to the UK. Is there anyone in the UK who wants to get married? Are there any single men between the ages of 30 and 40?

TL;DR: we had planned to get married in two months. I had already made all the preparations to immigrate to the UK and live with him, but after a fight last week, he completely changed. He insisted on breaking up, and his attitude turned so hostile that I didn’t recognize him anymore. I feel incredibly discouraged and frustrated.